Dear BellaDear Bella,

Someone who is close to the situation brought my attention to last week’s letter to you concerning a Dominican girl trying to locate me. It broke my heart when I read it because the young lady in question is a very nice person.

At first, when we started off it was a simple friendship. She talked to me about the issues affecting her and I was like a shoulder. I helped her the best way I could.

When I realized we were getting close I told her I had my wife and family. She said she understood and she didn’t mind.

On many occasions, one thing led to another and we slept together. Then she told me she was in love with me. I told her don’t forget I had my family. Again she said she didn’t mind. We kept it on and I fell in love with her too.

I had to return and I knew I couldn’t let this love affair continue so I gave her a fake number because I didn’t want her calling me. I did this for her sake and mine.

I wish I hadn’t gotten that close with her because I know she is hurting. But she needs to move on. My distance from her wasn’t to hurt her but save her from me. She deserves better than being second.

I think she should move on. I won’t jeopardize my family. She shouldn’t hold on to me.

Soldier Boy

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Hello Soldier Boy,

You started jeopardizing your family the moment you became intimate with this woman.

Some women agree to be in relationships with married men claiming they won’t be offended by the wife but that’s just a cover-up.

I’m not saying that she shouldn’t be in love with you, or you in love with her because really the heart isn’t always smart.

What I’m saying is that precaution is always better than cure. You knew you couldn’t have a future with this woman, yet you allowed this to go so far.

And if you claim to be in love with her; then you are cheating your wife out of your love. You’re sharing it with someone else.

You can’t just ask her to move on like as if this never happened. Perhaps it’s easy for you but clearly she’s devastated.

Soldier boy; the next time you are assigned to any foreign land; stay far from the island girls.

Best

Bella

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