Bella,

My friend is with an abusive man and alas I have no idea how to help her. It seems she wants help one time and doesn’t the next.
Apart from the physical abuse, he tells her how to dress, what to eat and she must take home her entire salary to him so he can decide how she spends it.
She has been my friend since college and she has always been a happy go lucky, free-spirited woman.
We behaved like young women, liked fashion and loved life. Now, she met this rasta dude and he has changed everything.
She can no longer weave her hair, apply relaxers, use make up or even normal things like deodorants.
Her hair is now messy. She uses oils from the rastaman shop and she just dry and old looking.
No heels. Sandals alone and no food if it is not grown. She lost weight and everything for her these days is “the system”.
We decided to go out the other night and when she returned home, he beat her because we went to KFC. He says it means Killing Foolish Costomers (KFC) and had her drink bush to detox her body.
My friend almost died because she had a diarrhea for three days.
Bella I am sad because this man is killing her slowly and all she can say is “my king loves me”.
Should I stay out?  Because the little chance I get to see her, is all we have. I don’t want to mess it up.
Not A Rasta
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Hello Not A Rasta,
Sometimes, we just have to let people be. Especially if they are adults and already have their minds made up.
If after all that you’ve mentioned, your friend still classifies this man as her king then her mind is clearly towards him.
Pray that your friend sees the relationship for what it is.
I believe that’s the most you can do for now.
Bella