DEAR BELLA: My girlfriend gave me back my engagement ring

Dear BellaDear Bella,

I need some advice. I am 22 years old and my 25-year-old girlfriend, which I have been with for like seven months, wants to get married.

She recently asked me and I said I wasn’t ready. From that day we began having problems and she keeps throwing it in my face.

Some days ago, I finally made up my mind and asked her to marry me. She accepted and said yes and she asked me what date are we going to do it.

I told her in December 2018 and then she just gave me back the engagement ring.

What should I do? Please help.

Yours sincerely,
Confused Individual

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

Dear Confused Individual,

Keep your ring and save it for someone who can wait for your hand in marriage.

Apparently, this 7-month girlfriend of yours is seemingly more eager to wear the rock rather than to wait to grow in love with the man who will hand it over.

Marriage is not something to be taken lightly hence when two people decide to get married, it must be for all the right reasons.

Take your time my dear.

You want to know when you are married, that it is everlasting. You don’t want to spend the rest of your years questioning why you got married in the first place. That would be a nightmare.

As for this woman, I’m pretty sure there are many other eligible bachelors who would be willing to jump into holy matrimony with her blindfolded. Please do not be one of these persons.

Best.

Bella

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23 Comments

  1. Eliza Dushku
    June 14, 2017

    My boyfriend cheated on me even in public places and when I try to let him see the implications of what he is doing he threatened break up with me. after some while, my boyfriend fell in love with another girl, i was so heart broken.. I was in PAINS.. physically hurts in the chest. emotionally distraught. wish there was a pill or shot to take that would make you feel all better..i contact Dr.mack in regard of getting my boyfriend back and Dr_mack@yahoo. com reunited i and my boyfriend together with his powers, OMG this is exactly how I feel..I feel so happy

  2. Da4real
    January 13, 2017

    22 is absolutely not the time to be marrying anyone especially someone you met just seven months. Additionally if she is the one putting demands on you to be married, its time to run as fast as you can and dont look back. She is manipulative and controlling and thats not the way to start a relationship.. Twenty two is the time to be either in some college getting a degree or learning a trade. Its also exploration time. To test the waters. Im not suggesting you be a slut and screw everybody but you need to experience life my friend. How can you know you only like vanilla ice cream if you never had chocolate? Hope you catch what im saying. In order words dont marry the fisrt woman you meet unless ure absolutely sure its the one and please again 22 is not the time to be thinking marriage.. Ure still an immature kid… You still have some growing up to do.. Date as many women as you can and hopefully after you have grown and be in your 30’s you can think of marriage

    • young and ready
      March 7, 2018

      I dont believe that there is an age to get married as long as its your choice , your ready and you love the person nobody’s opinion should matter

  3. UDOHREADYET
    January 6, 2017

    She unknowingly did you a favor… this is a blessing, take you ring and run, listen to your instincts before you listen
    to a woman… if your instincts and what she’s saying are the same thing then its the right decision. If they are opposed then your instincts win!

  4. S.Rowe
    December 22, 2016

    Are you certain that she is not 8 months pregnant?

    • Da4real
      January 13, 2017

      I like that…. Lol

  5. Nurse JoJo
    December 22, 2016

    Boy I would just give u a set of blows…my brother leave mamzel in her business and fly away home! Ur little p…. just start growing size u letting woman rule your life already. Child go and pawn that ring to bring d money for you mother eh. That Dat good for u I would just bust ur head with d ring.

  6. young and free
    December 22, 2016

    22 is to young to get married and after 7 months got to be kidding me

  7. young and free
    December 22, 2016

    22 is to young to get married and after 7 months you got to be kidding

  8. Riviere
    December 21, 2016

    You should talk to your mother or your father or your uncle or your aunty or you Parwear or your neaneen about that. You can talk to your priest too.. I suspect you will be offering that engagement ring to someone else in seven more months.

  9. Me
    December 21, 2016

    If you refer to you girlfriend as a “which” instead of a “who” I am frankly not surprised.

  10. Shameless
    December 21, 2016

    Run partner run as fast and faaarrrrrr wayyyyyyyyyyy as you can in the opposite direction. She aint nothing but a gold digger who thinks marriage will lock her in and whatever serious skeleton thats in her closet will be exposed soon so thats the reason she is in a hurry. Been there and know the signs of romantic turbulence ahead. RUN, I SAY RUN until you can RUN no more 8)

    Always Assertive! :twisted:

  11. kalinago
    December 21, 2016

    Definitely. Move on. It is not wise to rush into a marriage.

  12. Daughter of the soil
    December 21, 2016

    Is she a christian ?

  13. December 21, 2016

    Every disappointment is a blessing.7 months and you are getting engaged ? Well ,you are immature ,I do not say that to hurt you; wake up and smell the roses.Run faster than bolt because that woman is too busy ;she does not worth it.Take this as a lesson ;never be too busy to marry any woman much less a man..It is much easier to break up when you are single than married..Hope you did not take any credit on your name because right now you will loose your money and someone else will have that woman while she is laughing at you.

  14. Gyaldem
    December 21, 2016

    7 months together and you popped the question?? Wow! That seems a bit hasty to me.

    Some women still waiting for de man to ask them and they with him for 17 years….

  15. Dominican
    December 21, 2016

    Why give an engagement ring out of pressure? She is right to send it back, seven months is still a friendship. She did you a favor buy her a Christmas gift and move on.

  16. December 21, 2016

    Dear Confused Individual:

    I agree with Bella. She has given you caring and wise advice.

    If you were seeing me for pre-marital counseling I would be probing to find out why your girlfriend wants to hurry up the wedding. She may have a reason or reasons. This may need to be worked on.

    Your girlfriend obviously wants to be in control. She has little or no regard for your feelings. This is not a good foundation to build a marriage on.

    You should both be willing to give such a serious decision careful thought and not rush into it.

    A love that would not last for two years of engagement would not last for a lifetime of marriage.

    Sincerely, Rev. Donald Hill.

  17. Simon
    December 21, 2016

    7 Months? awa

  18. Frank Talker
    December 21, 2016

    Boss, she dumped you. Get up, wipe your ………, and move on. Bye.

  19. Shortie
    December 21, 2016

    Please take THAT advice….. This girlfriend of your is kookoo… you do not need her!

    • Shortie
      December 21, 2016

      yours*

  20. zandoli
    December 21, 2016

    My friend, this woman did you a big favour. If I were you I would send her a big Thank You note, then delete her from your contact list.

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