I am not from Dominica but I read Dominica News Online every day. I have a situation that I would like you to help me with if you can. Maybe your readers can shed some light on the subject.
Ok Here goes…
I am not married but has been with my boyfriend for some time and we have one child.
I do sleep around but not often. I have two guys, one my child’s father and he is a nice guy, good looking.
The other is a prominent figure in my community, has his own home and buys me all I need and want. We make passionate love and sex with no protection. He makes me feel like a queen.
The thing is I do not feel that way with my child’s father at all, yes he takes care of me and his child but all he does is nag nag nag. To get away from all that nagging I strayed, many times and now I am partly living with both of them. My child’s father does not know about the other man but the other man knows about my child father and he wants me to leave my child’s father but I will not.
What I am trying to say is Bella is that I have contracted the virus that causes AIDS and I do not know how to tell anyone one of them. I am not sure from who I got it but I have it. At first I thought I was under stress having two men and all but then I keep on getting fever and is always sick and tired. Finally I went to see a doctor and we did some test. I got the news three months ago that I have the Virus.
It can be treated but I am so sacred. I am telling you I am sacred.
I have NOT been with my child father from since I found out but I am still sleeping with my prominent man. I know what you all are saying but if I don’t give him sex he takes it anyway and tells me I am giving my child father and he is going to go see him and tell him about us. So to avoid any problems I give him what he wants.
I know that is bad but anyway I cannot sleep with my child’s father because I love him too much but I do not know how to tell the two of them I have the virus.
Bella What do I say to them, how do I say it to them. Can you advise?
Thank you and hoping to hear you and the people voice so I can get the courage to say something.
Desperate
Dear Desperate,
This is a very serious matter and the health of many people close to you are at risk. There is a lot that can be said to you but in the interest of space, I will keep it short.
First of all you need to tell both your child’s father and prominent man of your status. This should be done sooner, rather than later. Knowing that revealing your status to these men is going to have enormous impact get a third party who knows of your status to help you. It could be a counselor, a doctor, a pastor or priest. This could help ease or avoid ‘the heat of the moment’ when you reveal your status.
If you want to continue having sex I implore you to practice safe sex. You can prevent the spread of HIV.
Now it is important that you find a good doctor, possibly an HIV specialist – one that can monitor immune system and your disease. Build a good relationship with that doctor so he or she can give you the best possible care.
The key to living with HIV is to learn as much about HIV as you can. The old saying goes “Knowledge is Power” and never has that been more true than when you are HIV+. By understanding your disease you can take control of your life instead of letting HIV take control of you.
Being HIV+ is not the end of your life. Medication is available. The key is how you continue living your life.
Bella
Have a problem? Write to Dear Bella at [email protected]. Dear Bella is published Tuesdays. All letters are subject to editing and the editor has the right to not publish an article if it does not meet the company’s editorial standards. Also, the advice given is not necessarily expert advice, and is basically an opinion, therefore we accept no liability that result from giving any opinion. As such we encourage you to seek the advice of a professional counselor.
THis is just bad bad bad,you have got to say something cause they will find out soon, just make sure that you are not alone when telling either of them cause its not an easy thing to tell someone, i hope that you change your ways and protect yourself from now on,i feel sorry for that child, i would not want to ever be in that mess but keep the faith and give your life to god. god bless you.
i hope she telling the right story after you come and bend down for your child father. if both of dem doe give it to you you very nasty the men when you see you havr your faihful wife doe let them nasty give you that and spread that to your wife
IS MAN DOES CAUSE WOMAN TO DO DEM TINGS!..BESIDES, MAN TO DAMN DANGEROUS!!!!..IT’S OBVIOUS ONE OF YOUR MAN DEM SLEEPING WITH OTHER WOMEN..DUH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i sympathy goes out to you my girl….. you are not the first and you will definitely not be the last….. this is not the end of the world…. trust in God and he will see you through….there are alot of us that feeling guilty thinking that we are the only ones cheating in the relationship,think again….. him a cheat too…..how again would she have gotten the virus?……. one of her partners were not being faithful either…… My girl, all i could tell you is good luck and take care of yourself and your child.
hi
if u need someone to talk to about the treatment u can talk to nurse blaize at the outpatient department which is at the princess margaret hospital the number is 266 2102
My advice to you is tell them separately letting each one assume he may have given it to you. Go somewhere public. tell him you have been feeling sick lately and visited the Dr to be informed that you are now HIV positive and encourage each to be tested.
THIS IS TERRIBLE!! YOU HAVE TO TELL THEM AND AND CONCENTRATE ON LOOKING AFTER YOURSELVE AND YOUR CHILD AND STOP DE NASTINESS!! YOU SEE WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU PLAY WITH FIRE!!!
do u have any family did u fall from the sky
You are in a dilemma. I would not want to be in your shoes. It is said that it takes 10 years for HIV to surface. You could have had it for a long time.
Promiscuity will do it. This is one of the causes of HIV. It does not pay to have more than one partner. In this case you are unable to determine how you got it and who gave it to you. You did get it from someone.
You will have to tell them. I urge you to say a fervent prayer prior to doing so. Only God knows what will be the outcome when you tell them.
You should know if you are aware that you contracted HIV and willfully have unprotected sex and transmit it to your partner(s), you could be arrested, charged and imprisoned? This is a serious matter.
Seek medical care immediately. Miracles do happen and who knows? If you get proper care you may get better or it could be stabilized.
I wish you and your child all the best. Keep up hope and keep up the spirit. God bless you!
I’m afraid that you have been misinformed, Justice and Truth. HIV can be contracted anywhere from 3 months and more. This is the reason why ppl who are exposed or vulnerable are advised to test every 6 months (3 months being the window period for infection). What you were probably trying to say is tht it takes 10 yrs for the virus HIV to progress into the full disease AIDS. My intention isn’t to discredit you in any way but rather to correct what may be an unintended error. Allow me to commend you on bringing to the attention of the young lady who claims to have the HIV virus that she could face criminal prosecution for exposing her partners to HIV without telling them that she is infected. This is where I believe that society and the Caribbean judicial system fails us. This is an example of manslaughter or 2nd degree murder. We need to revisit our laws to make provision that would discourage infected persons from transmitting the disease because of selfishness, negligence or just plain vengeance. Too many ppl have passed on diseases to others knowingly in an attempt to “get back” at others when in fact, the only ones we should blame are ourselves for not taking the proper contraceptive measures. It would be biased of me NOT to say that some spouses (married)end up getting CAUGHT because the love, trust and respect that they have for their partners overpowers their instict to protect themselves during intercourse. We need to prosecute infected persons who knowingly and willingly transmit HIV. As the saying goes, “misery loves company”. Fellow Dominicans, take care of yourselves and I do not only refer to eating the right foods, getting exercise or dressing well; it extends to using SAFE SEX PRACTICES. My dear young lady, do not make anyone else victim to your greed and selfishness,inform your partners, seek counselling and pray about your situation. Remember that your daughter is involved. I pray that her father does not have HIV. After all, who will she be left with? Who will provide for her?
check this out!
http://usnews.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2012/06/14/12226274-man-makes-safe-sex-argument-to-overturn-conviction-on-hiv-exposure
hey if she had sex with these two guys,which one did she get it from
well my dear do the right thing and tell them cause i am also HIV too and i am having sex but safe sex that not the end of your life
I sympathize, but at the end of the day, God is in control, and If you call on Him He will answer you and save you. Trust the Lord, Surrender your life to Him, in the meantime, be upfront with those you have to be. do the natural and God will do the supernatural.
Hmmmmmm sick people.
speak the truth!!! if you are not Dominican why are you so interested in Our NEWS. It sucks.
I mean your dishonesty SUCKS!!!!!
@ may
You also read it. Shame on you!
That’s not nice. I ama dominican and o chrck
Out all orher news.
Brilliant advise from Peacock tell both partners know.
Is promiscuity that causes AIDS plenty woman have man that faithful to them and they sleeping with others.. is nastiness that causes that.. so that day must come!
That is why having one partner is right! All those that have more than one partner take heed!
Having more than one partner is not kool! First you sinning,next there is a possible you might get the virus HIV.
WHAT A MESS …END OF STORY…
Goodness ,gracious..wicked woman. Maybe you should take a life of celebacy. Poor guys, they have aids and who else might have gotten it too because of your way of life. You should go where they won’t be able to find you, write each of them a (nonreturn address) letter telling them you have aids.
You can not call the woman wicked. There is more to the story than we reading into it. Don’t judge.
is nastiness that cause that.
@ Anonymous
Probably the other boyfriend has it and gave it to her which is why she is still having sex with him, unprotected? Sometimes they do not tell everything. Not everything can be printed.
i believe so to
She did not force the prominent man to have sex with her. If the man was faithful to his wife, he would not be have sex with her….Some people never learn. he said that even if she don’t give him, he takes it anyway, as though she is his prpoerty. Some men too like to have what is not theirs. The woman is wrong, but the other man or men are also wrong. It is not your wife, leave her alone. Some of them cannot see a woman pass, they acting as though they never had sex and their lives depend on it. And they will not learn until something drastic happens. A guy told me yesterday, that any time a woman offers him sex, he is taking it. I mentioned about aids, but he still does not get it, and he has his woman. Men will still have unprotected sex while they are being unfaithful, and then bring the sickness to their wives. Lord have mercy.
just tell them. the reality is one them probably gave it to you. i speculate it to be your prominent man because if he is sleeping with you unprotected and “taking it anyway” he is doing the same with others
MY GIRL……..
how you make ur bed so u will sleep on itt…… but come on i knw it maybe hard for u to tell them but for once in your life u need to be honest with the people you love….
Girl i most say u made me scared these men just dont know how to stay faithful. Lord have mercy.
wow i am taken back,there’s a psalm in the bible that pertains to that type of living,yea psalm 50,you need to read this psalm so you could get a grip on yourself and life in general,then read 51 for your redemtion,those are my two main psalms,to respect my creator and to beg his forgiveness,because i been no saint myself,but when one get’s a major affliction it’s time to pull up your socks and check your way of life,there’s a way that seemeth right to a man,but the end is death.
sad anyway you watch it. i have been dating this guy for about 3 years now and he lie like hell.somebody tell me that he still sleeps with his x girlfriend and he keeps denying it…well i went to do my papsmear and my doctor called with bad news saying that i had some form of std,which he say is currable as long as i take my prescription and use condoms.well that was easy because i just tell mr its over .three months later i went back to doctor ,took another smear and voila,all is well.let him kill himself but he not killing me
she is from dominica she was to nasty now u going to lose everything money and material things is not important as ur life dominicans learn a leason from that life is sweet without sex if u want sex protect your self be faithful to your paterners am sorry for a child involve but not u u put it on yourself
She was loose, but the men are alcso loose. It took two of them, and she did not rape them, they all enjoyed it. She is wring to live that way no matter what, but they all share the blame. They have their woman, they have to learn to be faithful. Temptation is always there, but men have to learn to walk away Honesty is the best policy. A girl/woman walks from on road to another, and men will call her and say all types of lies to get her, some even curses when the girls/woman ignores them, so why do men do those things, they have their woman, they get sex. When you speak to tthem, they say”is man eh”. Some of them are not even capable of performing 100%, but they still act like a playboy. It is a shame. I am always speaking to my son about those things. It is wrong, and that is that.
Some of us parents see nothing when our sons have many girlfriends, but when they get sick we blame the girls, well I blame all of them, because they all participated in it, and now reality has set in. I hope men gets the message. Aids and Std’ are all over the place. PLEASE STAY FAITHFUL TO YOUR PARTNER…… For GOD’S sake.
Bull crap….your story makes no sence at all…if what you’re saying has a bit of truth! you should be jailed…one question….how many men do you sleep with….? girl you need prayer….you nothing but a big foolfool…saque matea…………….attention you want just turn your face when you see my family passing your way….
You do not have to disclose this yourself to your partners, I am not sure of where you live, but in places like the US a medical team will do the notification without even disclosing who you are. They will simple send an unanimous letter asking all your sex partners to go and get tested because they may have been exposed to the virus. Secondly you must seek treatment immediately, your life depends on it and you will feel much better after treatment. There is a lot of help out there, take advantage of it before it is too late, think about your child. I have worked in this area for many years, and trust me,there are so many just like you. “One love”
this is a very desperate moment for but hiw can u enjoy sex knowing three n=months ago u were diagnosed,,,come on man,,,tel ur child father first,,,tell him among friends and family who could support u and safeguard you,,,ur child life is at stake too so seek care for ur child when bringing this message across to ur man,,,,this prominent man i know should have a family so u should tell him too life is not a joke…we need to own up to our responsibilities bad or good,,,,,,,,nad remenber jah is always there
wow u say u keep on haveing sex with the man thats not ur child father so wat if is ur child father that give u HIV i would tell the both of them they have a right to no and maybe them too have orther pple they haveing sex with wow that is bad
remember she only found out 3 months ago.all before she had it and was sexing these men and all the others she have not mentioned
people who cares if she is from Dominica or what, she has a very seroius quest on her hand to deal with, now is everybody business out there in the world where ever she maybe, its indeed a felony to knowingly having the HIV virus and willing sleeping with other individual unknowing to them, the best advise to this wo/man is to come clean with her sex partners, that they can all seek medical help which can help prolong their lives because one can live anormal life with HIV on medication.
DESPERATE you’re lying about where you from, you’re lying about the reason you cheat (and continue to do so), you lying to all the men you (about your medical condition). You’re even lying to yourself about why you’re still having sex (unbeknownst to your partner) while carrying the HIV virus. For example if you get your period today and your partner wants to have sex you would tell him stop you have your period, but you have AIDS and you cannot even get yourself to stop having sex. Stop lying, face these truths, please tell those men about your condition because you are spreading death.
This is a longshot but based on how certain women think and the fact that you are lying so much; I have a feeling that you want to give that man the virus. That way you can keep him and have someone with the same virus to have sex with in the future. It’s because you love your child not the father you don’t want to give him the virus because you want the child to at least have the father in case you pass. Truth hurts.
who knows you may have given it to your child father already,so why not allow them to know so they can get treared as well. you say you love them so why not tell them, one mght stay with you to take care of you when things get bad.
OMG. I still believe you are from DOMINICA. It’s scarry business out there, and trust me anyone can get the HIV virus these days. You don’t have to be running about, but nice and innocent men/boys/women/girls bring it straight to the bedroom for you, whether you are Baptiste, Methodist, Catholic, Hindu, Rasta, SevenDays,Jehovia Witness, etc…IT’S SCARRY, BUT YOU HAVE TO TELL THEM BOTH!
I am reading some good advise ,no one didn’t really say nothing bad about her .That’s good from my country people, love you guys and stay safe, no condoms no sex.
@ shy
And vice versa.
YOU TOO DAMN WICKED!! WHETHER YOU TELL THEM OR NOT THEY WILL SOON FIND OUT WHEN YOU INFECT ONE OR BOTH OF THEM! YOU ARE A SICK WOMAN!!! YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT LOVE IS!
IS “LE-MEH POR-CHAM” YOU HAVE TO EVEN HAVE THE GUTS TO TELL THE WHOLE WORLD YOUR WICKED SECRET EXCEPT THE TWO MEN IN YOUR LIFE WHOM YOU CONSTANTLY PUT IN DANGER!!
Young lady please do yourself a favor and come clean like bella said have a third party present, because after breaking this news there might be violence. And from now on have all your partners wear a condom . Young people please learn from this experience, not leaving myself out.
Hmm, this is a serious matter. Firstly, I would advise you to seek a councelor or a therapist for that matter, to find ways to tell both men. Your child should be your main priority therefore you should get her tested as well, No matter how much it will hurt or how hard it will be, you MUST tell the men of ur situation Or else it will become worse. HIV is a serious thing even though it is not fatal anymore, Learn to practice safe sex my girl. I wish u luck!
Alas plenty people going and die wi That AIDS thing in dominica just a plague…… any man that loving woman with child or children think it might be you!
ohh damm…you give your “promiment man aids” now he going to give it to his other women (please dont be naive enuff to think you’re his only girl) and those girls gonna give it to other guys…and those guys gonna give it to more girls and on and on…look at how many people u just killed just cause you want a little money and nice cloths
it might not be she that just killed them cause she wasn’t born with the disease but if she said she only sleeping with those 2 men then she got it fr one of them? N idk y she say she not sleeping with the son father cause because she started getting suck now don’t mean she just contracted it! Now might just be the time where the HIV is full blown aids! n maybe is that sugar daddy give it to her n like said uf she has her man most deff dude has other girls he doing! Well look the whole of Dominica die now! lemme go take myself n my man lafaleise eh!
Bella,
I think you have been duped. The individual who wrote this story is only trying to access your readers response….I know who she is…. and yes she is Dominican.
For some reason, reading her story I had a strong feeling she was D/can just by the way she expressed herself,but the senario is serious,people get life sentences in prison for knowingly endangering others with the virus #justsaying!
@ Anonymous
You must have a sixth sense. Are you are spirit?
Dear, you have no choice but to speak. The fact that you are aware imposes that responsibility on you, which is different from if you did not know.
Sadly, someone else might know he is ill and you are going to take the blame because you owned up. In any event you need to free up your mind and conscience in order to move on and best continue to provide for your child. His safety and care are your top priority now so you must do what’s best for you so that you can be there for him.
What’s done is already done and the hands of time cannot be turned back. Now it’s take a deep breath and move forward.
my advice to you is to tell them one at a time soon. , who knows maybe one of them gave it to you. just face it head on . it’s better to tell them now , And also do you know, if you know you have HIV and spread it, it is a criminal offense? And Please you have a child so start taking your treatment. don’t blame yourself now , maybe you did what you had to do to survive ,it’s too late now to be blaming yourself just try to move forward from there .Good luck
Be real to the guys !! Tell them what’s going on .. Don’t distroy orther life . Cuz from what am reading that’s. What you doing .I bet u ur two orther men have woman out there to .. So what u doing here darling is just speading it . And u say ur child father keeps nagging . Here u are nagging ur nonce sence to us . When u can do what is best bye talking the truth ! And little do u know , u going let that virus drain u out bye keeping it a secret.. Didnt u know that AID and stress is not a. Very Good combination…….
LORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRD BELLLA OH MY GOD>>> WHAT IS GOING ON WOMAN>> PROTECT YOUR SUSON>>> I KNOW WHEN YOU IN THE HEAT OF THE MOMENT BUT PAL COME ON>>>> YOU KNOW YOU HAVE IT YOU SLEEPING WITH YOUR SIDE MAN WEAR A CONDOM…LORD
Papa God! What am i reading here? You have HIV and you having sex unprotected?
People Protect yourselves out there. AIDS is not written on people’s faces!!! Alot of cute,sexy men and woman out there and they spreading it!!!
STOP making sexiness and prettiness fool all you into sleeping with people!! you don’t know who have the virus!!! STOP and i repeate STOP having multiple sex partners!!!!!
STOP Risking your lives for temporary pleasures!!!
you see what going on here? This woman has HIV and still sexing unprotected!! It could be you being the victim here!!!
AIDS KILLS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I BELIEVE THAT PERSON FROM DOMINICA
lol i believ dat too
awa! dont have to be! alot of grown people from other Caribbean countries come on here to know whats happening!
You should tell them that you have it who knows u could have gotten it from either of then and one of them probably was not being honest with you in the first place maybe they knew they had the virus. Just sad that u were going around with more than one person now you do not know whom you got it from and based on ur words it is all because of materialism. It is wise and loving on your part for u to inform them and let us hope u find out whom u got it from. In the meantime you need some counselling and help on how to cope with this having HIV is no longer a death sentence just get the proper help and treatment for you and also for your kid. You can still live a normal life let us hope that there was a lessoned in this which is Have one partner so if you do contract this virus you know exactly whom you got it from.
GIRL ALL U DO JUST START UP ONE PIECE OF CRYING WITH YOUR HAND ON YOUR HEAD BUT MAKE SURE THAT YOUR CHILD IS NOT HOME WITH U AT THE TIME JUST YOU AND HIM. WHEN HE ASK YOU WHAT U CRYING FOR BREAK THE NEWS TO HIM BLAME HIM FOR GIVING IT TO YOU DO THE SAME TO MR PROMINENT CASE CLOSE.MEN DUZ LIE ALOT THEY DUZ SAY IS ONE WOMAN THEY HAVE AND BY THE TIME IS A DOZEN.SO IS ONE OF THEM THAT GIVE IT TO YOU.AND DON’T GO SPREADING IT EITHER CAUSE YOU WILL BE CLASSIFIED AS A MURDERER.AND MAKE IT RIGHT WITH GOD SEX IS NOT ALL.ALL NOW I DON’T KNOW WEN LAST I BREAK A WATER AND AND AM A WOMAN THAT LOVE SEX.SO TAKE A BREAK.GIVE GOD YOUR LIFE K ALL THE BEST.
You are a wicked girl to cheat on your child’s father and bring HIV to him.
For sure I would not turn the other cheek for that one, sorry!
Lord, do not test me with a situation like that because I don’t think that’s a burden I’m able to carry!
Because she is honest to say that she cheats does not say she brought HIV to any of the two.How are you so sure its not her child’s father or the prominent man who gave it to her???Oh plzzzzzz.Hear d name ino…Muslim always.STUUUUUUUUPES
THAT IS A BUNCH OF LIES AND STUPIDNESS, PROMINENT MAN AND IF I DONT GIVE HIM HE TAKES AND HE WILL TELL HER MAN? THAT IS A BUNCH OF CROCK, NONSENCE, LIES LIES, TELL THE WORLD I SAY SO
AH!!!!!!!
So sad…..
but i’m angry with you for having sex with your “prominent” man and not telling him. Just so you know – you are endangering his life – and what if youyou gave him the disease after you knew you had contracted it?
MANSLAUGHTER.
Be very careful of both these men because this can turn into a volatile situation quickly.
I’d advise you to do it with someone else around – most likely the doctor.
Sorry to read your sad story, I would say that if you write both of them a letter and explaining to them the situation you are in and advice them to go have some test to ensure they get the right medical help that is required. DO NOT LEAVE IT TO LATE, the sooner he better.
What you are doing is a crime. last year the Canadian court prosecuted and sent two people to prison for doing what you did. They charged them with manslaughter. You are very selfish and playing God with people lives. The minute you found out, you were obligated to inform everyone you are having intercourse with, along with those you had sex with in the past. I pray you do the right thing because that’s how aids spread am sure these men are putting other women lives at risk too.
I WILL ADVICE YOU TO TELL YOUR CHILD FATHER FIRST THEN THE OTHER MAN AND ASK THEM TO GO TAKE AN AIDS TEST AND TAKE YOUR CHILD FOR ONE ALSO PRAYING THAT THE LORD KEEP HER PROTECTED AND SAFE FROM ALL DISEASE,AND PRAY THAT THE OTHER DONT CONTACT THE GERM AND ALSO PRAY WITH FAITH FOR YOURSELF CAUSE THERE IS NOTHING IN THIS WORLD THAT THE HEAVENLY FATHER CAN MAKE POSSIBLE AS LONG AS WE GO TO HIM IN FAITH AND BELIEVE THAT HE ALONE CAN DO THIS FOR US….GOD BE WITH YOU….
Goes to show again that nice guys finish last. Would be curious to find out why was the baby father nagging so much. Is it because he suspected something? Material things again.
My suggestion would be to say that you are not feeling well and have them come to the doctor with you individual. At that time, they will learn their status.
Unforturnate if true.
This is a sad situation and no amount of blame can reverse the harm that is already been done is spreading rapidly.
Without further ado, you need to sit down the men in your life, and tell them in a short and simnple sentence…. I have the HIV virus .. not sure how I got it ..but I have been tested, and I have it .. you need to get tested … I am sorry. Prepare yourself for verbal and even physical attack – but prepare ….
Next, get your child tested .. that is crucial. In the meantimne, find your local AIDS committee or whatever name it is called and seek advice as to how to handle the disease, your health, your child, your sex life…..
In all of this, you need to seek God. Pray for his blessings, forgiveness and courage to deal with all this. The disease is life threatening but if dealt with, you can live a long and normal and happy life.
Stop being promiscuous and from now on, practice safe sex.
All the best.
Very good advise.
….you see dat sex thing dere……. good thing I give dat up
hello
, if every one now about wat she is saying
she can be charge with murder knowin that she has the virus and still sleeping with this man can cause him to spread it in the community so who knows how many people these two men sleep with
everyone knows that both men going to fleep and maybe get violent.
well get a priest a doctor and a police
good luck
true but she stated that she stopped having sex with her child father and the other guy would still ‘TAKE IT’ if she tried to deny him…it sounds to me like this other guy is controlling and probably abusive..if this story isnt fabricated…
i advise u to tel ur child father that so he would go look 4 another woman probably d other guy gave it to u who knws i suppose they all have it.dats wat u get 4 nt being faithful’
like u so being faithful lmao
even if he found a new woman he will still be spreading the virus…there are 4 lives being ruined in this situation lets not add any more…and i also believe it was contracted from the other guy rather than her child father but u never know
Desparate, the good thing, as Bella said, is that an HIV diagnosis is no longer a death sentence. We are at the point where HIV is becoming more of a chronic disease and with proper treatment and care, you can live a very long and productive life. Having said that, I’d suggest you contact your local HIV/AIDS office. They can actually help you with how to have that difficult conversation – telling your partner about your positive status. They can also direct you to free treatment and care (in the event you are unable to afford it) – and for those who didn’t know, treatment is free in Dominica. Most importantly, you need to stop having unprotected sex. By doing so, you are only helping to fuel the spread of HIV … and posibly setting yourself up for criminal charges (check the case law). Remember, we are greater than AIDS. IF we are all willing to do our part (abstain, be faithful, use a condom, avoid drugs and alcohol and educate ourselves) we can put an end to HIV.
My dear that story is somewhat confusing. however, gain some courage that only God can give and let the people know. but first you need to get some counselling to deal with you first. Get your child tested and just do what’s right. i know it is very hard but you will not be the first.
you are wrong in all that story, u sayin that u love ur child’s father and u will not leave him for the other one . If u really had loved him u would never had been unfaithful to him what ever the situation at home. HIV is some thing that anyone can have, but there are means of protection . the first mistake you did wasto be unfaithful, the second is not havin used protection with that man ,a man maybe u don’t know nothin abt his life.
i suggest i you tell both , stop lying, you are living on lies. be honest with you. It is true that somewhere somehow there will pains, sorrows, but it is now or never, knowin what will be the consequences when they will find out. But i all that double life of yours you never thought of your child. Now you need to take courage and talk, it will be hard but asking God his help he will give you the strenght needed. And what ever may happen after you tell both,accept and assume what u see. We are not there to judge bcoz we don’t have the full story, but all i can tell is your child and your health first , they such be you priorities
You’re paying the price for sleeping around.What you like best kill you fast. Be honest and tell both men before them have the virus and go spread it around to other innocent women.
I think this woman from Dominica guys beware.
This is not the price to pay for sleeping around. Thge fact of the matter is we are all capable of contacting HIV. There are persons who got it from getting a tattoo. Those who got it from someone who intentionally gave it to them. Those who got it from their partner after having been faithful. To me this is really scary because the bf could be having sex with someone else who is having sex with someone else who is having sex with maybe ten others and in between innocent persons who dont run around get caught up in the process. I think we should all just take a stand and get tested with our partners. Speak to each other about what will take place if you have it and if you dont. HIV is not as terrifying as they put it. IT all comes down to you taking extra care of yourself if you have it and if you dont have it take measures to prevent it. Talk to your partners about HIV.
no need to go throwing stones and discriminating. it can happen to you.
i just have one question. DID YOU GET UR CHILD TESTED TOO?? if not you should.
@just looking you focus on the pastor part alone eh i find.. didnt notice counselor.. priest doctor… lol we dominicans are truly special….
But i agree with “……………..” i strongly believe that this person is from D.A and is scared of how ppl will react to this situation.
However, i am not judgmental just saying that this is why no one should have more than 1 sexual partner. its ridiculous.
PRACTICE SAFE SEX
Father Lord I ask for Wisdom, Guidance, Protection and a Spirit of Content. Let me learn to live within my means and not beyond. Let me learn to be grateful for the Life you gave to me and have pride in it. Let me learn that my body is your temple and I should take care if it. Help me father!!!
And that is helping the woman, how? Stupes! Darn pharisee! Go pray in your closet if is nothing you don’t have to add to the blog.
Prayer can be said and done ANYWHERE, in any medium and form..this is a lesson for both u and i…and even the young lady too..Be WISE and Seek wisdom fo yourself too
Bondieu hoye READER you have limiere portcham man! karmem thanks for the comic relief. Dominicans are special
You see that. When people dont know what they want. You running around, have two men, what you expect? You could have easily avoided that, noone else to blame but you. Some people may think im harsh, but im just being real.
but she cud have been with one individual and contracted it as well… the other patner cud be the one running around.
First off, sorry about the prognosis, but you need to stop having sex; you are making the situation even worse by not telling either guy about your health! It sounds very complicated for EVERYONE involved, but YOU can somewhat retify this by telling your sexual partners. Best wishes to you.
Are all the other pastors better than B.J? Stop with it people, the man is moving on with his life, church and family, so you do the same. YES she can tell a/her pastor that she figure she can trust. Remember fingers pointing back at you. No one is a SAINT
Wow, tough one.
Firstly, it appears that only you seem to be willing to own up. If you’ve been sleeping with the two, and have been feeling ill for some time, they too may be feeling ill, and are either aware or not aware of their status as well.
This is the tricky thing about having multiple partners because no one really knows who gave what, except if to yourself you know that you’ve been loyal to your partner.
A child is involved.
I think you should speak to your child’s father first, and get that ordeal dealt with. Then face Mr. Prominent Man, only God knows how many other women he has already given it to.
He may threaten to destroy your life, but I think your main concern should be your child’s dad, so focus on him, especially if you think to yourself that he is a good man and might have been faithful despite your problems.
At the end, there’s no easy way out. You have no choice but to face the battle.
KEEP IN MIND YOUR TWO LOVERS MIGHT BE SPREADING THE VIRUS TO OTHER PERSONS.
PLEASE TELL THEM
BY NOT TELLING THEM YOU ARE GUILTY OF MURDER INDIRECTLY.
You are so so right. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Criminal_transmission_of_HIV
People don’t understand the risk of having multiple partners nowadays. I am a young Dominican man and I have a girlfriend who I have never cheated on. My friends make this seem like the most unusual and strange thing. It’s like there’s an unwritten rule that says a man must have more than one woman. I am extremely attracted to my girl the same way as when I first met her and she satisfies me in every way possible so I see no reason to cheat even if lots of opportunities to do so come up. Besides being in an exclusive relationship is so much safer than running around. We get tested together so we know our status. If every man was like me the world would be a better place but what am I saying?…there is no hope. Btw I think this person is Dominican but is afraid creating a scare
Limited edition, i like your choice to be with one woman. Especially when the two of you get tested together and decide to be faithful…nothing better than that! I hear woman say all the time, oh all man does cheat. I refuse to low down my standard and accept that from a man. I dont cheat. Life is not a game of chance. Im not rolling any dice. Thanks for keeping hope alive.
oh lard contact me i”ll help u. email me at [email protected].
You’re a mess; seek counselling for the sake of your child. Look deep in yourself and the advice your seeking you will find.
How can you have unprotected sex with anyone after finding this out, are worldly things more important than your dignity and your child’s welfare?
Lord have mercy. are you kidding me? This must be really hard on you. you need to tell the both parties before its too late. think and build courage….
advise your child fada and d oda to have a hiv test so u could no from who u got it from den u could talk to him and let him no dat u hve d virus also if not get someone real close too u to step it up its not d end my girl !!!
By now, most likely both men could be infected and she would not know from which of the 2 men she got infected. It may well be possible that she got it from the “prominent” lover, because pregnant women get tested for HIV?AIDS, and if she did not have it during pregnancy, chances are the child’s father was not infected….#justsaying.
the woman could have gotten it elsewhere and not necessarily from them! Now if she was with one partner, she could know exactly where she get her thing from!!
Good advice Bella
This is some crazy stuff! Only God has the answers my people!
Papa…. hold strong my dear. all is not lost… there are different forms of sickness. and i can tell you that HIV is not the worst…one thing i dont do is discriminate because we never know where we end up in life we can aslo be innocent vitims. just make sure that you family/friends that you can relate to everyday and feel normal… one love
that’s some great advice
You from Dominica u LYING!!!
sorry i know its a serious issue but that person comment take me. Boy boy boy allu on DNO not easy he.
READ
it said am NOT from Dominica!!!
you se what happpens when we dnt kn wht we want.. if you love your child father ust b with him than hving to be with two men.. now look wht happened.. hmmp hmmp
but it may not be the other man that gave it to her.. whether she loe the child father or not is get she get it
Bella you would really advise the woman to tell a pastor she have HIV……..? Think of it, would you tell “B.J” you have HIV?????
‘just looking’ i totally agree with you. i would not tell B J i have HIV. the whole congregation going to know and by extension Dominica. smdh
it just might save you from being umm, sod.. om ized.