Dear Bella:

I am in love with this guy for almost two years now. At first I didn’t want to be in a relationship because I am afraid of getting hurt. I love him and he is always telling me that he loves me.

But the thing is that his ex is still living with him and they have a four-year-old child. I ask him  why is she still living with him [and] he tells me that he don’t want to put her out because of the child, and it will look bad on him to put his own child out.

The thing is people keep on talking about both of them will get back together one day and I am afraid of that because I love him. He makes me happy and I make him happy the same way too. I am scared of getting a broken heart. Please help me I want to know what to do.

In love.

Dear In Love,

I have heard of so many stories where men who are living with their child’s mother claim they are no longer in love with her; however they are together because of a child. Why would you want to involve yourself in that drama? While I understand that sometimes one just cannot help their feelings, your lover needs to make a choice if he says he loves you.

The issue I find mind boggling is that if he and his child’s mother are living together and you are in a relationship with him then both of you share him in the bed? I would hope not. If he wants to breakup with her he should be living on his own because the closer he is so-called ex the more opportunities present themselves for them to be intimate.

My advice to you is to use your head. Of course you’d be concerned if a man loves you and is living in the same house with his ex. Tell this man to settle his relationship issues, and stop hurting you and his child’s mother.

Bella.

Do you have a problem? Write to Dear Bella at bella@dominicanewsonline.com. Dear Bella is published every Monday and Friday. All letters are subject to editing and the editor has the right to not publish an article if it does not meet the company’s editorial standards. Also, the advice given is not necessarily expert advice, and is basically an opinion, therefore we accept no liability that result from giving any opinion, and by reading this column you agree to indemnify us from any such liability. We encourage you to seek the advice of a professional counselor.