Married man with crush

I’m a married man in a really tough situation.

A year before getting married to my fiancé there was this girl that I found very attractive.  I did not see her frequently (and still do not). But, I would go out, see her and try to ignore her presence but find it hard not to steal a look at her.

I think she observed that I stare now and then, but I guess she was probably shy and I, not wanting to be unfaithful to my fiancé had no choice but to leave it alone and personally deal with my attraction as a mature person.  At times I felt sick to the stomach with thoughts of her lingering in my mind even if I don’t know her.

I’m married for about two years now and I’m very happy.  But whenever I see this girl, I cannot sleep, she haunts my thoughts.  I dare not speak to her or make my feelings obvious especially if my wife is around.  I think she is aware of it by the way I might look at her if ever our eyes meet. But of course, I remain very composed. Like nothing is up.

I am a good, decent man so I’ve prayed about it.

But really Bella, just seeing her haunts my nights.  I’m a Christian, do not want this temptation, and been dealing with it for at least three years now.  I wonder if I should approach her maybe say hi casually some time. But I don’t know.
I’m trying hard, I do not think of her, I’m busy with work, my family etc., but once I see her everything falls to pieces.

What to do?

Husband with crush

Dear Husband with crush,

Feelings can be controlled and dealt with but we must first understand what we are feeling. At first you were attracted to this woman. Considering the fact that you never interacted with her it was a physical attraction. You suppressed what you were feeling because of loyalty to your fiancé and so it grew into lust or infatuation which has compounded the situation. We cannot switch feelings off and on as we desire.

Attraction to other individuals does not always lead to sexual relations. We become attracted to others for different reasons and ignorance of this fact can lead us to make terrible mistakes. You need to discover what you find attractive about this woman and why it turns you on. Having done this you can be decisive about how you should interact with her to get over what you are feeling. Staying away will only deepen what you are feeling now and it is not going to help.

Face this feeling head on and keep praying.

Bella

Editor’s note: This ‘Dear Bella’ was supposed to be published yesterday but due to circumstances beyond our control we were unable to publish it. Reader can expect Dear Bella every Tuesday and Thursday.

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83 Comments

  1. natural dominican
    March 20, 2011

    yo try to hit that then see where it goes from there…good luck

  2. Love
    March 20, 2011

    young man ask yourself is there any thing to hard for GOD. u say u r a christian so ask God to remove that person from your thoughts and i no he can and will.Don’t fall into satan trap. what if the table was turned,”what goes around come around”

    • am me
      March 21, 2011

      its not jus God who has 2 remove d girl from his mind he has 2 do it himself n pray 2 God for strength that he will…..GOD HELPS THOSE WHO HELPS THEMSELVES

  3. domcroix
    March 19, 2011

    I do not know what I would do… But suppose she is sick with some , suppose she has bad attitude, suppose she is a loud mouth, street woman who just look good? Temptation is not a sin and never will be. Rap with her and remove the blind fold… you will see if she is worth the trouble.
    If there is one doubt, in your mind, run like Joseph ran from portifer’s wife, Don’t leave your shirt, she could be a jazebel, run boy run, the power is in your hand… It will cancel out the crush and you can laugh.

    But do not tell your wife about that, especially if she is insecure and even a slightly jealous woman. She will hate your female friends and will assume you are being unfaithful, if your telephone is not answered. Do not open that door as suggested by the others… It will add sorrow and stress in your house. Use wisdom, on this one.

    I have been married 24 years, and other ladies have come and gone. They have complemented me and have set their bate, with gallows ahead to entrap me, but thus far, I have walked away each time. Read the story of sampson and delilah. When you are finished, read it upside down and side ways and ask your self questions.

    • DA Girl
      March 24, 2011

      tempation is not a sin but LUST is. GOD first always and for ever. Ask your self WWJD “What would Jesus do?”

  4. Mr.loney
    March 19, 2011

    Partner if I was u I would knock them boots ,and get it over with .god knows what crush or what ur wife does…I was so faitful then I found out she was not … No more mr. Nice guy .

    • Yes !
      March 20, 2011

      So you are just assuming the person he has the crush on is just going to go along and be “knocked down”. All you just running to chapel, not getting to know who in heaven you are marrying to , then you on DNO giving adultery advice. Pitiful!

  5. TAINTED
    March 19, 2011

    Thank God it’s just a crush. If she’s the type of woman that I am I’d say she’s not shy she’s just not into you, involved with someone else or married. It’s a vast difference actually seeing someone, talking to them, and being with them. You have placed your feeling for your wife on theback-burner fantasizing about something that’s not into you or perhalps involed with someone else.It reminds me of the time I had that dream of being a millionaire. I laid in that bed refusing to wake up because I wanted it to be so reaaaaaaaaallllllllllll. Then I had to give myself a swift kick in the butt and accept it’s just a dream/fantacy and being a millionair does not make one happy. It takes more than money and for you it takes more than a crush. Accept what you have or else tell your wife de truth, get a divorce and persue your crush. I hope you get double crushed fool….sorry just my sentiments…Honesty is the best policy.

  6. da real hmmmmmmmmmm!!!
    March 19, 2011

    only ting u can say is da ur a very weak man …having a woman haunting u ,,, hm boi on tv alone i does see da

  7. outrage
    March 19, 2011

    if the other woman like you, then my poor man you have no chance, dominican woman like to sample other womans husband, and dont forgrt, those sorta woman like to then go tell ya wife while dey in town in front of everyone,,,,, forget the woman you married your wife because you love her, remeber that!!!!

  8. O.G.
    March 19, 2011

    for once this bella character startin to make sense!

    • Yes !
      March 20, 2011

      Yep I agree, I found the advice this time around rather mature and sound!

  9. Waitukubuli
    March 18, 2011

    I am going to be very honest with you – You are a Christian and you seeking advice from Bella? Your God is the one true and wise counselor, and Jesus said to pray “lead us not into temptation”. As a Christian, He should be the one you run to not Bella.

    Secondly, devote some serious time reading what the word of God say about adultery, lust of the eye and temptation. Just find these scriptures read and meditate on them and see how the Holy Spirit will start to minister to you in ways you never imagine and I guarantee you, your flesh will be subjected to your spirit so much that the next time you see that woman you will feel differently. “Is there anything to difficult for God?”

    One last advice “Blessed is the man who walk not in the counsel of the ungodly”. Always run to the God of wisdom.
    God bless.

    • yow yow
      March 21, 2011

      wat is so wrong in asking bella 4 a lil advice…..what make this so unchrist like….if she shoulnt come to bella for advice i dont think u should b givin advice either cus ur not God.. as u said “You are a Christian and you seeking advice from Bella? Your God is the one true and wise counselor, and Jesus said to pray “lead us not into temptation”. As a Christian, He should be the one you run to not Bella”…..And i dont think u should b readin this column on DNO

  10. Muslim_Always
    March 18, 2011

    Firstly, one cannot control how you feel but you CAN control HOW YOU ACT.

    Secondly @ husband with crush, It seems to me that this is an infuation. The reason I say this is these rush of feelings occur whenever you see this woman. However, when she is out of sight she is either out of mind or the intensity of these feelings fades. Thus, the first thing you do is to recognise what feelings you are dealing with. As I’ve mentioned before this most likely is an infuation.

    Thirdly, I really do empathize with you regarding this emotionally tough situation you are dealing with. I admire your courage to remain faithful to your wife and did not act on these feelings.

    My suggestion to you is the next time these feelings resurface, cancel these thoughts with a positive one; for example, say to yourself that this is just an infuation, this is not authentic or some phrase that would cancel out these feelings. Just as these feelings take time to subside, your wordings will take a little time to treat it so be patient. It is a mind over matter situation. I believe it may work with you because you echoed in your writing when you see this girl you ‘act maturely.’ Reassure yourself that she is just a human being who goes to the washroom and has to go 6 feet under just like you. In short, cancel negative thoughts with positive ones.

    If you apply these basic techniques and keep out of harms way like avoiding flirting, seclusion etc with this woman, these feelings will subside the same way they took sometime to creep in.

    In summary, human body is made up of three dimensions thus deal with this from 3 angles:

    1. Physical – avoid physical, seclusion etc with this woman.
    2. Mind/emotional – cancel all infuated thoughts with positive ones like the love you have for your spouse.

    3. Spirit – constant prayer to the Most High, fear of Him is the beginning of wisdom.

    I hope this helps… Oh by the way, do you have images of this woman whilst you are having relations with your wife? Hope to get a response from you.

    • outrage
      March 19, 2011

      my goodness muslim always my online friend, i am impressed not once you mention you know what,and i for once i agree wit you, must be the full moon lol

    • ?????????????
      March 19, 2011

      Muslim_ Always … this indeed was very good advice… husband with crush take note!

      • Muslim_Always
        March 19, 2011

        @ Outrage: Thank you for your funny comment. It’s not about the full moon :-D , I am a person who reflects, accepts constructive criticism, and rather flexible.

        @ ????: Thank you for your feedback

        • outrage
          March 21, 2011

          muslium, it is called a sense of humour, the moon comment was also part of the funny,lol

    • HMMMMMM(the psychic)
      March 20, 2011

      Excellent Muslim…Everyone should read and take note

    • sweet pum pum
      March 21, 2011

      Hey I’m also a fan of yours I look forward to reading your comments you always have some
      good and positive advise :)

    • sweetness
      March 23, 2011

      Boy you are doing a good job,keep it up.Are you a trained councellor?If not you are gifted.

    • Dominican
      April 16, 2011

      “infuation” is that a new word? or did you mean infatuation? This is good advise however

  11. Opinion counts
    March 18, 2011

    this is a normal thing to be attracted to someone else however you shouldnt let this attraction grow further keep on praying about it when ever thoughts of her comes to your mind and dont encorage these thoughts try to wipe them off.. you should maybe speak to your wife about it a little .. you should also talk to the girl but not flirtatiously just to find out the main cause of your attraction and try to get over it maybe after you speak to her you might even get turn off by her personality but then again it might be the other way around lol good luck

  12. Truth, Justice, Love, Peace and Unity
    March 18, 2011

    As always, Bella gives excellent advice as best as she possibly could.
    Those of you who make silly comments, get to the top and bottom of this case. The man wants advice. Cease your silly comments which are of no use to him. I do not know why you waste your time in such a manner.
    Temptations! They surround us. I will admit, affairs of the heart, this one is difficult to give advice and to solve. One has to be extremely strong and of faith to avoid temptations. Even then, those who think they may be strong in spirit and are also strong of faith succumb to temptations.
    He was not yet married. Throughout the years dating back to, no doubt, the ancient days, many people have broken their engagements for all sorts of reasons and this will obviously continue until the end of time.
    Even though he was engaged, he should have spoken to the lady. I do recognize that he would not want to hurt the feelings of his fiancée since he made a decision to marry her. However, this would have given him an opportunity to talk to the other woman and to ascertain if he really is in love and want to get married to his fiancée.
    People are not perfect and they do make mistakes. When they realize it, they should be honest enough to admit it and to pursue their dreams; hopefully they will bring them life-long happiness. Most of all they should pray to God to guide and assist them.
    The problem with some people is they may not have been ready to get married. There are some people who get married for all sorts of reasons and the wrong reasons. Consider the numerous separations and divorces in the world.
    I am emphatically stating this: DO NOT RUSH INTO MARRIAGE! Ensure that you are in love and this is the person whom you wish to get married to. Marriage is for life. Do not get married for convenience as some have done.
    Your life is precious. After God, it belongs to you and you alone. When you make a decision you are responsible and you have to bear the consequences.
    Marriage is supposed to be a happy union no matter what the obstacles and struggles of life. If a man is in love with his girlfriend/wife he will not yearn for another woman and her companionship.
    Those who feel differently about their decision to get married and have feelings for another woman it is because some people married the wrong people and not for the correct reasons. This is a grave mistake. Please do not tell me differently.
    Just ask some of them and listen to their stories and there are many. You will soon find out why they got married in the first place.
    My advice to this man is he is married. Consider the reason why he got engaged and married. Was it for love or for lust? Was it someone who was financially off and held a certain position and could financially assist him? Was she a popular person? Was it because she is attractive, is popular/well-known or of a certain status? Again, I could cite other reasons. Look into your conscience and sincerely consider why did you get married and are you in love with your wife?
    Generally, a man who is engaged is assumed to be in love with his fiancée. He does not look upon another woman as he has stated.
    There are times he may be attracted to another woman and has visions of being with her if you know what I mean. However, he cannot love two women at the same time and have the same feelings for her. Keep this in mind, one woman at a time.
    May he be honest with himself. Do not torture yourself. I am stating that he may be married to the wrong partner. Does he want to live a miserable life and consistently think of this other woman? In this case, it will not be easy for him to forget her. He has to do something about this. Approach her and talk to her. Then he will surely find out who she is. This should set his mind at ease.
    He should be honest with himself. At this stage, I am not insinuating that he should strike up an affair with her knowing that he is married. This would be swimming on chartered waters. What more can I say?
    Keep in mind we are not God. Therefore, we can only surmise. I always say that God knows why people get married. He knows if it is for the correct reasons or not and if one party or both were sincere when they took their vows.
    Those who are adults should be realistic and not knock/criticize people if they decide to end a marriage. Furthermore, we have seen many of these. Do the parties want to remain in an unhappy marriage or not? I do not endorse being married and having a girlfriend/mistress on the side. It is absolutely wrong!
    I for one opt for a happy marriage if my partner is a loving, caring person. Life is a two-way street.
    The finality of it all is he must continue praying to God, have patience and wait for the Lord’s answer. After having done that may no longer have any illusions about the other woman. God heals in many respects. However, do not deceive yourself. May God assist him.

    • HMMMMMM(the psychic)
      March 19, 2011

      You yourself always there trying to be sarcastic about other people’s comments like yours is any better or you want to be the only one other than Bella to give advise. Can’t you see that Bella says whatever is in her mind which sometimes causes her to say the wrong things? If I ever have to seek advise I will not consult neither you nor Bella . Bella is crazy and a drunk and we don’t need a swaying novel from you. Just a few sentences with the main points are ok. By the time I’m done reading your post I have forgotten everything.

    • No faith
      March 19, 2011

      This is an oxymoron of thought . why then does ur religon permit more than one wife? Go give urself ur advise muslim_never.

    • Anonymous
      April 4, 2011

      Great advice there

  13. Dominican Man
    March 18, 2011

    Man you`re guilty as sin a hard muscle does not discriminate this is your forbidden fruit go fot it`~` it might cure whats ailing you. Dont play with the pastor rod. There`s so much hanky panky going on in our lovely Dominica its spreading like wild fire every body is innocent untill they are caught. You must be praying to the wrong God or else you would not be struggling with your lust. Hope your wife hire a good lawyer. I`m one contact me.Just joking!

    • Truth, Justice, Love, Peace and Unity
      March 19, 2011

      The power of the tongue can be a dangerous tool, offering bad advice. Never give ungodly advice for what goes around comes around.
      It is nothing unusual whatever type of relationships are occurring in Dominica. Some of you act as if Dominicans are more guilty and sinful than those of other countries. This occurs all over the world.
      Oh yes! Lawyers get rich defending people. They charge too much especially when the government is paying them for defending those who do not have the means.
      Let me inform you, just stating the above paragraph gets me angry. People commit crimes and at the expense of taxpayers – no exception Dominican taxpayers – the government pays for their defense.
      As one thing leads to another, you speak of demonstration! This is one demonstration which should be conducted. Not demonstration when the Prime Minister is doing what he possibly could to enhance Dominica and build it up for Dominican residents to be proud of. In the end they will be proud of it and boast about it. It is not for him for he will only serve a few more terms if elected. In the future, whenever that is, there will be another Party in power who will be making use of the building. Consider that.
      Pertaining to being a lawyer if you are really one or not, did you ever hear this story? Probably not. I read it.
      The Gates of Heaven fell. St. Peter said it is Satan’s fault. He went to Satan and accused him of it. Satan denied it. St. Peter said he is going to find a lawyer to settle this case. Satan replied, “Tell me St. Peter, where in Heaven will you find a lawyer?” :lol: Did you comprehend this? There are no lawyers in Heaven. Probably very few. I do not want to insult anyone but the moral to this story is: “Lawyers are liars.” You should know how they could defend criminals and others. Especially criminals/murderers, who get away with murder. God is not blind, deaf or sleeping. In the end, people will get just what they deserve.
      Those lawyers who make exorbitant sums of money should assist the poor and the government too. You know the saying: “You can’t take it with you” .

  14. Your P#n$s is your wife own now
    March 18, 2011

    why can’t a man just be faithful…u might not forget about the other woman….but don’t increase the pressure in ur pants…be faithful to your wife…i think u should mention it…so that …first u are being honest…no matter how much she runs her mouth in anger she is still happy u told her…then when ever this woman comes to ur mind… imagine ur wife… fantasize about ur wife…it’s not wrong…it’s ur wife…when u go home put those fantasies into reality! okk…cool…

    PS…AM A 19 YEAR OLD VIRGIN MALE! HA…BUT SERIOUS MAN BE FAITHFUL…LOVE HER SHE IS URS AND U ARE HERS…ALLOW NO ONE…NO ONE TO BREAK WHAT LOVE U HAVE FOR UR WIFE…HECK IF U HAVE TO BECOME ENEMY WITH THE OTHER WOMAN DO IT!! CONSIDER HER THE DEVIL TOY…BUT NOT LITERALLY…HE WILL USE HER TO GET TO U!

  15. mouth of the south
    March 18, 2011

    my boy the only solution is to tell ur wife,,, the more jealous she is the better,,,, then when she’ll hit the woman in her face with a chaufette bien chaud the problem solve,,,, if not by then,,, simply invite her to a threesome n all parties happy

    • kixxer
      April 5, 2011

      looooool

  16. EMPATHETIC.
    March 18, 2011

    Guess to some extent I know how you feel.

    This can happen to women too. However my advise is this. Always honour GOD first. Speak to Him at evEry opportunity and in the silence of your heart. He knows what it is like to be tempted, but he never sucumbed to temptation and this is the best example that one could follow.

    Secondly Honour your spouse – you chose her and she accepted you for who you are. No spouse deserves the heartbreak that the consequences of bad choices bring. You as well do not deserve a guilty concience – women have an ease with which they detect those things.

    Thirdly be prepared. You never know. An opportunity to speak to that person be come upon you unexpectedly. Discipline yourself. Ensure that your first words will be genuinely wholesome. If you are unsure of this, ask the Lord to place the first few words on your tongue… He knows our hearts and will help us if we are genuine.

    Be careful, the devil is a subtle one. This will not be his only attempt to distract you.

    ALWAYS KEEP CLOSE TO GOD. LET HIM KNOW OF YOUR FEARS. TRUST HIM AND HE WILL PROTECT YOU. A DAILY CONCIOUS EFFORT TO FOCUS ON HIM AND WHAT HE EXPECTS OF YOU IS ALWAYS A WINNER.

    YOU’LL BE FINE. BEEN THERE AND DOING GREAT – ALL THANKS TO GOD.

  17. Lizavier4Jesus
    March 18, 2011

    Husband with crush

    Your letter to Bella sound so much like a song I know from the man named Conway Twitty. “It is called Linda on my mind”

    In that song he talked about being engaged to a woman, but in love with the lady called Linda. And so he said in the song: Now I am lying here with Linda on my mind; and next to me my soon be (his wife) the one I left behind.

    Sound like you are not the only one who has been faced with that dilemma. Don’t know how men like Conway Twitty, who sang the sentiment, would advise you to deal with it though.

    But gee! After two years of marriage to your wife; you say that you are happy with your family; you say that you do not think of the other lady; just that you fall to pieces whenever you see her–even if you do not see her often. Are you sure that you are trying hard enough to get rid of this thing in your mind?

    I am not a man, but I feel that if I was happy with my husband and family, that aspect would overcome all temptations that would come against my happiness with my husband and family, yes! Unless you have not told Bella the whole story.

    You said that you do not want this temptation in your Life and you said that you are praying. Well the effect of pray depends on how you speak the words of prayer–pertaining to your attitude of faith and trust, in God’s authority in the name of Jesus Christ. You said that you are a Christian man.

    Perhaps, if you truly do not want to nurture that passion that you experience towards that lady when you see her, you should start praying with deep faith, forcefully speaking the words of rebuke against your feelings of the flesh–if that is what it is. Unless the situation with you is that you are in love with that lady.

    Speak, in the name of Jesus Christ, and command Satan to get behind your back–pertaining to your passion of sex toward’s that lady. Speak like that, every time you see that lady, everytime you experience this passion towards her. But you can only have victory, if you want it.

    • Anonymous
      March 20, 2011

      Well said Liz

  18. cleanbowled
    March 18, 2011

    Bro, dealing with such matters of the heart is never easy for men or women. Attraction to the opposite sex will not end suddenly because you are married. However, you must continue to pray to God for help in strengthening your mind and heart to resist this and all other temptation. As you stated, you are a decent man trying hard to do what is right concerning your marriage.

    Please don’t be fooled by the tricks of enemy that is trying real hard to lead you down a potentially dangerous and tragic road. You are definitely not alone my brother in your struggle for God,s word says that we are not afflicted with any suffering uncommon to man. Remember, once you pull the trigger, you will not be able to put the bullet back so fight hard to avoid taking an action that will leave many, including you, emotionally hurt. I am pulling and praying for you and me and all others trying to press on against temptation…..Love God first then loving your wife and others will be a lot easier.

  19. dreadlocks
    March 18, 2011

    man tok to d woman let her no how u feel dats how it is if she a woman wen u tell her u married she will say to u Congrats dat lady got a good guy Respect d lady just like u would want a man like me to respect yr wife

  20. Hitman
    March 18, 2011

    that girl is a fool

  21. Nervous Rex
    March 18, 2011

    Mister is de fella dat ask his wife for a 3-some. I like his determination stii. He doesn’t give up.

  22. ok
    March 18, 2011

    being attracted to someone this way is really hard to get rid off

  23. Understand
    March 18, 2011

    Such is life. Full of challenges and temptations. You just have to be strong.

    Both men and women deal with this, that’s why there is so much cheating and break ups in relationships. Not only marriage.

  24. dominica abroad
    March 18, 2011

    Nothing is wrong with having feelings for someone other than your wife or husband, its how you act upon those feelings is. I honestly think you should talk to her, who knows maybe when you do, the stuff that comes out her mouth might be a complete turn off and all your hunting dreams will disappear. :-D :-D am just saying ……

  25. HMMMMMM(the psychic)
    March 18, 2011

    Oh boy…you are in a difficult situation. Love your wife more and pray to God that you forget about this other woman because the more you think of her the more you are likely to be miserable and thus will turn your frustration toward your poor wife . Pray my brother, pray and let God take care of the rest.

  26. Sparrow idol
    March 18, 2011

    Line(6) ought to read: thoughts of her in LINGERIE keep lingering on my mind. Not your stomach liar it’s your pants on fire.Sacawy maco.Chrisitian you say? You guys are the most souef. Man you should have sowed your oates assez before you got married.Then you’d not be lusting after the flesh.it would have been done that been there can do without it.Now you are hurting in your pants. My advise to you.Bella might not approve.Tackle her and do the both of them like Sparrow said in his song.De both of them.Do it,do it de both of them.

  27. dominican will always represent for the parrot on the flag and jus REPEAT anyting they hear
    March 18, 2011

    hmmmmm

    • HMMMMMM(the psychic)
      March 18, 2011

      8-O including you

  28. young & frustrated
    March 18, 2011

    when u see the woman, u must say “u want to tempt me” and don’t yield to the temptation.

  29. sweet pum pum
    March 18, 2011

    Next time you see this woman walk up to her with a smile and say hi. Have a decent and harmless conversation with her without coming on to her . Play it safe, after talking to her this may slow down or neutralize your strong heart palpitations every time you see her. We all see attractive people out there that we may even have crushes on, but after speaking to them for even 5 minutes we find that they are not so hot after all. No harm in talking to her, these feelings are like quicksand the more you wriggle the deeper you sink. Its all well and good for us to tell you to ignore your feelings but at the end of the day you are the only one facing the agony until it becomes an obsession and emotionally eats you alive.

  30. Dr.Finger
    March 18, 2011

    Grown folks make grown decisions. Be a man and say hello to the lady. A casual conversation will not hurt but careful with those night mares because they can lead to daymares if your wife find out especially if she have a little Carib blood in her :lol: :lol: . Whatever you do after that will be your own decision.

  31. citoyen
    March 18, 2011

    if you wife is understandable talk to her about it.

    • sweet pum pum
      March 18, 2011

      I don’t know citoyen…how many women are going to be understanding about their man obsessing about another woman ?

    • hmm
      March 18, 2011

      hA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! u best stop lie dere..NO woman wants to know that even if she is the most understanding woman in the world..so wheel n come again

  32. Anonymous
    March 18, 2011

    I know that woman not from Grandbay because all jean gwabay tellment led ….

    • 999
      March 18, 2011

      You have met ALL women from Grand Bay to make that kind of a statement?!? I think Grand Bay has some of the most beautiful women. I married one! Maybe they don’t want you! LOL

    • lol
      March 18, 2011

      lmfao

    • Anonymous
      March 18, 2011

      Oh please…you need to shut your face barboon. Maybe you saw your reflection when you were in Grand Bay.
      That is why they need to enforce “don’t look in the mirror whilst driving in Dominica”.

    • woooshhh
      March 18, 2011

      isb yrue g/bay ppl ugly well most of them and they cant speak well either..hahahaha i would never love a g/bay girl

      • hmmmmmmm
        March 18, 2011

        Or maybe a grand bay girl never wanted you when you wanted her go all over dominica and you will find ugly girls but you must be BLIND when you say all grand bay girls are ugly a%$#holes and yes we do speak well dumb a%$.

    • toujour wed
      March 18, 2011

      I would never love a grandbay girl ever.

      The day I do that regrettably I’d be known as pasa hard. These girls so ugly it not funny.

      And st thomas they lie down thinking they is beyonce and rihanna with their yam gwa jam.

      • ce-el
        March 20, 2011

        jealous u jealous of Grand Bay girls……….I will pray for u cause thats one of the things we can do best!

    • Sweet
      March 18, 2011

      nous led kon moda mamaw, ki plisay eveh pyha!

      • Anonymous
        March 18, 2011

        sakway sot

    • HMMMMMM(the psychic)
      March 18, 2011

      Alas….did somebody from Grand Bay break your heart? Why all of a sudden you decided to land on Grand Bay girls , saying that they tellement led. I have travelled all over Dominica and I’ve seen some good looking people as well as ugly people. And, if I was a trouble maker like you or I would say immature I’d tell you where to go look for ugly girls. You just want to start some trouble in here and if you think that’s the best you could do, well go ahead. It only takes a fool to make such statement. You really need to do some growing up

      • Anonymous
        March 19, 2011

        let me tell you…grand bay girls sweet weh ,cause i had one we dated for almost a year we finish ..cause she had her man n i had my gual…but we still arie but not intimate we always talkin about goin back but that will be cheatin although we did it before but i can tell you dem guals dere sweet ..so i don’t know wat mister sayin’ n i nt from gb wish i was cause i would be pipin alot of them dey 2 sweet..n let me tell u ner if u don’t kno girls with gwa jam thick n nice down dere so i guess mb u hav one inch thats y u sayin dat…lol

    • chemist
      March 19, 2011

      ahahah ….this is funny…but on a real someone from GB give u a gwo pwell man??

  33. Niceness
    March 18, 2011

    Leave the woman in her business – don’t you think your wife find other men attractive? I wonder what it would be like for her to introduce herself to each one of them. Huh???

  34. forkit
    March 18, 2011

    wood dem wood dem

  35. :)
    March 18, 2011

    think happy thoughts! :D

  36. del
    March 18, 2011

    This is an almost natrual situation. However, what i would advise is that everytime you see this woman, turn the attraction you feel towards this lady to your wife and pray consistenty about this. God will see you through. Feeling attracted to another lady besides your wife can lead to disaster if you alllow what you feel to fester in your mind. Any sin committed first begins in the heart and mind.

    • Sparrow idol
      March 18, 2011

      Well well! then all these christians pastors priest , nuns are sining every minute of the day.
      because it is certain they do daily in their hearts & minds.

  37. shatta
    March 18, 2011

    imposter stop use my name , i say go after the woman and see whats up ,after all things happen

    • Justice
      March 18, 2011

      You trying to make people believe you are mr. nice guy all of a sudden. PAH TRY SA.

  38. Shatta
    March 18, 2011

    Invite her to a threesome with your wife and then decide who you like best.

    • EaSiLy
      March 18, 2011

      @ Shatta

      GROW up!!!!!!!!!!!!! u little idiot!

    • Sparrow idol
      March 18, 2011

      hahahahahahahahahaah you is not good! is for effects peeps not a gramatical erring here!

  39. Piper
    March 18, 2011

    Garcon,
    I will give you one piece of advice, DO NOT ACT ON YOUR FEELINGS. Whenever sex is involved with anyone besides your spouse, the end resulot is almost always disastrous. Be it with the person who you found irrestible or worse, the relationship with your wife.

    Sex is like fire. It can bring you great joy and comfort. Used the wrong way and it will burn you.

    • Sparrow idol
      March 18, 2011

      Sex is like fire. It can bring you great joy and comfort. Used wrong way and it will burn you”
      Boss sex is like being on fire if that’s your point but to say it can bring great joy etc ,etc then can burn you if used wrong.tell us how.It can cook your food boil your water keep you warm if you in the outback banging toutounee. more so in laudat trafalgar etc.Isn’t that the objective with your wife or your concubines? Piper go with your philosophy of paradox.You must be a chrisitian too LMAO

  40. hmmmmm
    March 18, 2011

    papa met oyyee hmmmm.

  41. Margo
    March 18, 2011

    This is natural. Pray about it and try to think of all the ways that your wife makes you happy. I am sure other men see your wife as sexy as you seeing this other woman. Good Luck ma man.

    • Christian backslider
      March 18, 2011

      Ya you are so correct Pray about it and TRY the functional word there.Good luck trying .A stiff memeber is mightier than a sord. It will coupe’ anything in it’s way. Wife or concubine for some even cole females locally known as mal l’homme( ha ha ha ha)

    • Christian backslider
      March 18, 2011

      Margo ! is that you?You of all people should not be talking about praying you pray then do your thing.You making me laugh my Margo.You like your thing too much to give advise.

    • D/CAN
      March 18, 2011

      I agree with you totally…and it is just normal human behavour to see someone other than the person you’re with and fine them attractive….and I think he needs to understand that…I also think that the mere fact that he avoids that girl makes it worse..maybe if he spoke to her he would even see that she has nothing on his wife..pretty face ….bad character.
      And as you said another man could have that same issue about your wife..it’s normal ….don’t let the sight of another woman haunt you…yes pray …talk to her ..talk to your wife if you can…if she has a jealous streak like me…be careful what you say…best not even say anything….But you done good…keep it up!

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