I am a 27-year-old lady who has been in a relationship for the past 5 years, with a guy who is one year and a few months younger than me. It was a wonderful two first years together. I loved this guy more than I ever thought I’d have ever been able to love someone who is not blood related to me. I believe the feeling was mutual. We did a lot together, basically everything.
But in the third year together things started changing.
I am a very attractive lady. Lots of guys are after me. And in our third year together I became very popular on the island because of my participation in an important event. My boyfriend cheated, and after confrontation he admitted to the act. We decided to remain together since he explained to me that I was so popular and he was insecure thinking that I would leave him for someone better.
We moved pass that though, because I assured him that I loved him and want to be with him, not anyone else. Things started getting back to normal when he was caught again. At that point, I decided to leave.
He assured me that if I broke up with him, he will kill his self, and I was scared that he would, so I thought if he is willing to work us out, let’s give it another chance. We stayed together. He has been caught several times after and I felt trapped since I care about him so much and would hate to see harm happen to him. With all the hurt and all the tears, I chose him and remained. He assured me that everything will be alright and I hoped it would.
Few days ago, I got his face book password and for some reason, I searched his inbox. I was shocked to see the kind of conversations he held secretly in his inbox. I know I’m wrong for going there, but I not yet regret I did. He holds constant dirty conversations with girls across the world including girls from my little hamlet that I come in contact with on a daily basis. I am so hurt and so disappointed.
I told him that it’s over. But I feel so weak. He told me that it’s a phase he is going through and it’s his new year’s resolution to sell his phone and do other stuff that will make his life a simple one again. And he is assuring me that we will be happy together again. But this time I am not convinced.
Bella, I need your advice. And if you are able to recommend anyone for professional help, I will greatly appreciate that, for I am on the verge of losing my head.
If you are not convinced, then let that be your final decision.
There is an old saying which goes “one bitten, twice shy” and this is probably what you are feeling right now.
It appears that your boyfriend thinks that he can do his thing, give you some sweet talk and everything will be alright. I believe that he is taking advantage of the soft side of you, your weakness.
If you are convinced that things are not working out, then move on. It’s all in your hands since you know what you have been through.
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