I have been in a relationship with a guy for three years and eight months.

I can’t remember three compliments that he has given me in these years we have been together. To me, it wasn’t a problem, until I went through his face book profile and saw the number of compliments he is giving to this particular girl.

Since he wasn’t anywhere near me when I saw these, I wrote a message to his inbox telling him how I felt about his compliments to this girl. I was hoping he would at least talk about it, but he completely ignored it. When I mentioned it to him, he told me that he ignored it because I only want to cause a fight, and is taking a little thing and making it a big thing. He told me that I am just being jealous because he compliments his friend, that the girl is just his friend and he see no reason why he can’t compliment her.

Bella, I sure don’t mind him complimenting his friend, but what is hurting and is being a bother to me is the fact that he never compliments me, his girl friend. I am wondering if I am asking for too much of him.

I look forward to your response.

Concerned

Dear Concerned

Compliments are important because they strenghten a relationship. You feel on top of the world when the person you love tell you are a beautiful, sexy, intelligent and so on. They make you feel you loved and admired.

He knows it would make you happy, yet he makes no effort. Hmm. Giving a compliment isn’t hard. It doesn’t cost money or require sacrifice. I wonder how he would respond to you needing something that did require a bit of effort on his part?

You’re not asking him to lie. If he really loves you, why can’t he vocalise that?

You are not asking to much of him. All you want to know is how he feels about you; your looks, your intelligence and so on. If your boyfriend doesn’t compliment you, he is not really into you.

You need to seriously rethink your relationship with that guy.

Bella

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