Chair of the Commonwealth Women Parliamentarians, Alix Boyd-Knights, has drawn attention to marital rape on the observance of International Day for Elimination of Violence Against Women today.
She has expressed concern that many Commonwealth countries do not demand that a husband be charged for raping his wife.
In a statement Boyd-Knights said, “I wonder how many persons have considered that countries where no legislation exists to allow a husband to be charged for rape, such countries may be actually condoning domestic violence, state-supported domestic violence as it were.”
The United Nations’ International Day for Elimination of Violence Against Women has been observed since 2000, to allow governments and organisations globally, to raise public awareness of violence against women.
Boyd-Knights, who is Speaker of the House of Assembly here, believes Parliamentarians have a major task in eradicating violence against women.
“Raising public awareness is not enough,” she said.
She has called for intensive and “tangible” efforts by governments and other private groups to eliminate violence.
If i report my wife rape me on a weekly basis everyone will think it is a big joke. If she say the samething to people, them everyone will beleive her.
Mrs. Boyd Knight, I love that you are raising awareness for women who are raped during marriage but awareness should be raised for the men as well because this happens to them as well although it is not vastly talked about.
Although I have no respect for the messenger, she is sending a good message.
Ms. Knight Is Correct In Her Statement.
Since we all want to follow America and destroy the fabric of our society.
The husband should just do the “right” thing and divorce his wife.
After all, she has refuse to have coitus with him.
let us turn the hands of the clock around,a few months there where a talk about gays,many agree on the christian principle,its not right!lev. 21;18 man shoulnt sleep with man,also in the book of mat.christ said man heart harden cause there are no divorce,man dont want to forgive his wife if she/he commits adultry,good that same book also said,woman submit to your husband( to submitt means unconditional surrender) so there are no rape,if a woamn refuse her husband,she sin,in Gen. a man and woman are one,pls dont believe me just read
I do respect everyone’s opinion in regards to Alix’s attempt to focus on marital rape. As she outlined in her statement that she encourage all entities to join in support of her effort to address the problem. I am quite certain that she is aware of the injustices that are caused to men. However, there must be a starting point. The topic of marital rape is very broad. Nonetheless, she chose at this particular Day of recognition of the need to enact laws protecting women to focus in particular on the women’s issue. If all of us who chose to address this topic respond in a positive manner,she can compile the information that will create laws that can be replicated to support the cause of men. There are in many countries the Women & Men’s Coalition groups that support the entire family. In addition, as noted by Ms. Knight the other governments and churches should intervene. Too many Families are losing their men and boys. However, we find the churches, in some countries and states are not intervening.Generally, it about church offerings. In essence, what I am trying to say that it is an issue to be elaborated upon by “All”. Not just Ms. Knight. Just like the scale starts at “0” (the point where she has initiated for women). We can increase the point on the scale on the positive end. It’s not about us who chose to comment, but abuse of women & men as a whole.
what is so wrong about alix statement. The lady is right. men must realize the woman is not your piece of property. Dominica has too many bad mind men with rapist tendency no wonder they raping everything that pass by them .so people protect your children , your mother your aunty ,even your sons they behind your boys also and hide your cat and your dogs.Shame on those wicked men.
@ vip
They love sex too much.
It is not love at all or that they love the women or so much. This is only to satisfy their sexual desire; no control whatsoever. It is for this reason why contraceptives were devised in the first place, also to have as much as sex as possible without the women getting pregnant or not wanting to father a child or another one. It is all sex and nothing more!
JUSTICE YOU MUST BE A SAINT
YOU ARE SO RIGHT RIGH RIGHT RIGHT
isupport;
Your thoughts are clear as day. Dont be ashamed of the mind set of people….circumstances can create victims emmasse.
While we are in the process to progress be prepared for the dull and ignorant…they too have their say. In the meantime, dont be discouraged; keep lighting a candle in the dark.
I know a true story of a married woman being raped and became pregnant. It was the mother’s duty to nurture and care for the child as the other children.
On the other hand, her rationale was to never refuse her husband’s call in the future. He still was unfaithful in the relationship.
Why should the main option be to legislate against the man…I suspect it will eventually be legislating against family.
There should be a more humane course to take while we try to save the marriage.
A senuous and true relationship is what serious individuals should attain to…by this quarrels will be less common.
Violence in the home is another sad reality…I agree that our discussion should be broad enough to tackle all family issues so that Alix could be more confidently embraced.
Honestly, I question my heart on whether it would be good for my children to see their father go through the justice system( including jail time) because of issues that I am sure that we can address without the strong hand of the law.
hey people – stop changing your names and putting the same comment up – nonsense – stop wasting my eyesight
First of all, I’m a man. I’m married. Been married well over 20 years. Never raped my wife. Never will. If she won’t have sex with me for months, I don’t force her to. Never will.
Now, this subject, no doubt, is controversial. It’s interesting that I’m reading this piece just about an hour after ending a meeting here in London with a young Caribbean woman, where we discussed gender equity, including gender violence. It was instructive that this young woman noticed – and I agreed wholeheartedly – that, unfortunately, when reference is made to gender violence, we instinctively think of the woman and forget the man. She observed that the UN global development programme does not mention men at all, and asked how can we a development programme that ignores men? How can we expect it to work?
She also was worried that we are losing our men and that the women are worse off for it.
I’ve said all this to state that, while I agree that there should be laws to protect women from rape, including rape by their spouses, these laws should protect men as well. Yes, there are women who rape men. So let’s make these laws gender neutral. The UN has failed in this regard. It’s had its year of women, its decade for women, etc. Where is the attention paid to men?
I think I’m a progressive man and so, let me repeat that I agree with Boyd-Knights, but only to a point. Come on Ms. Knights, start pressing for laws that will protect all our citizens from violence, including rape. Anything else is tantamount to helping further destroy the family structure and our society.
Technically correct, in that men can be raped by women, and rape statutes should be gender-neutral in writing, but it is such a comparatively rare occurrence. Given how many women face violence in their marriages and other reltionships, and how many men think they have a right to force sex on women, you’re not being constructive here to say “but what about men??”
Man in Dominica, you’d be surprised at the level of domestic violence against men. Unfortunately, men have been cultured to keep it secret because they fear what the society might think of them if they complain. So I’m not trying to be an advocate for men here. I love my wife and family too much for that. What I’m advocating is that, whatever laws we seek to enact ought to be gender neutral. Rape – whether it is by man against man, man against woman, woman against man or woman against woman – is wrong and ought to be treated as such. As part of the law, there ought to be mandatory counselling, particularly for the children – if there are any – because they will know what’s going on and it will affect them. First offense should probably not include mandatory prison sentence, again, for the children’s sake, particularly if the evidence shows it really is a first offense and not just a first conviction.
I can go on and on but I’ll stop here for now. Let’s keep the debate civil and useful
Anon, you so eloquently put it. You fail to mention man and sheep/cow /goat even chicken i hear occurs in DA which has become the flavour de jour.How about that Madame Speaker et Anon??
@ Anon Again
I guess that you are in London, England not London, Ontario, Canada.
I expect as in Canada that Great Britain has legislated that a woman must give consent to her husband. Otherwise he could be charged for rape.
If you are in G.B. and it has the identical legislation, you are fully aware of it. This Law came into effect some years ago.
One of the better comments on a news item I’ve read here in a while. Like you, I was hoping that The Speaker would declare her intentions to either call on the government she serves to propose new legislation, or challenge them to declare publicly where members stand on this vexing issue.
Belive me, sex abuse, even in the married home, is rampant and causing much pain in Dominica.
Anon: interlectually igot your pt but when you introduced the issue and commented about yourself I had second thoughts.Moreso when you said you would go for months without sex (with your wife).Then you stated you were discussing with a young lady bla,bla,bla bla.There i became susupicious.
Are you getting some elsewhere?Level with me/us here Anon.Anon 3 days is a long time for me.I like you will not rape my wife but i will as for it and get even if not the very momen she might often say okay alittle later when am done doing xyz.But i guess all relationships are different but months Anon?? That would become solid from the viscous state in ur waist Anon as we would say in Brickston.
@St. Elsewhen, I’m pleased that you got the point. So let’s keep the the discussion at the level it was intended. For clarification, well over 20 years of marriage has taught me to understand and appreciate my wife more and more everyday, and to learn that there are things we can do together to help build and maintain and strong marriage.
The young woman I met is doing her dissertation on young Caribbean men in British society and what she sees as the lost generation of Caribbean men. She sought my input and I was happy to give it.
Since you got the point I was making – and I take it you’ve accepted there’s a need to enact gender neutral legislation against domestic violence, including rape – why the less than subtle attack? This is a very serious matter. Let’s keep the discussion civil.
Rape weather married or not is wrong. I am male and I said it if a woman says no she says no. Not to contradict myself but it is also wrong of women to use sex as leverage and a bargaining tool in marriage. Women who do this are also wrong. The fact remains is if a woman says no or she cannot take it then that’s that. no need to force her because if I make a little girl and she gets married and I ever hear that d partner better not sleep cuz hot oil does burn and scar.
Stop talking nonsense.. are you a child or an adult..
Thanks, T Wilson. I don’t comment often, but when I do I try to ensure it’s measured and adds something to the discussion
Granted, this is a subject to be adressed, likewise many other subjects of equal importants, however i wander if this lady is in it for her perfessional intrest or from the goodness of her heart.The welfare of the children that are being abuse and neglect is a good way to start, then work your way to the married couples, then i can see with you.MADAME SPEAKER.(just a side bar)Do not abause the men in the house.
Instead of adding more bitterness to a marriage that may already be fragile ask the couple to seek counseling nah. Why on earth would a husband rape his wife. Lord help us all
It seems that our percstption/meaning of rape here is different. Weather you are married, boyfriend & girlfiend, comonlaw couple etc. as long as you say no or you are NOT interested in doing or performing the act of sex at that particular time and the other person does not adhere to you wishes, it is RAPE!!
This is one time ignorance (of the situation that so very many women are going through in Dominica every night) is NOT bliss.
Married for years. It is obvious that you do not have an indepth knowledge of what “marital rape” is. You’re probably experiencing it and don’t know. Otherwise, your response would have been different and in support of the cause. Living a a curtain-drawn room I listened, along with my sisters the abuse of my mom. I deeply miss her. But, I know she is out of her pain. In those days you kept it all to yourself. She saw us all through college, with important positions, and yet she is not here for us to spoil her. Her spirit lives on. As for my dad, he celebrated his 90th Birthday, last week, and even that I couldn’t enjoy fully because of the mentally abuse he has imposed. I forgive him, but forget. I wish it never happened because I live with the memory everyday;especially, because I miss my mom. Yes, I am crying now because it still hurt. She was one of those helpless individual that kept her pain to herself. So, if all is well with you. Do support her decision to help other women and children like me who still suffer the pain.
@ Candie
Down through the ages many women suffered in this manner and they could not say a thing. In addition, some of the men still had mistresses on the side. Women have gone through a lot and at the hands of men also namely, their husbands.
Your mother obviously thought that she was performing her wifely duty. It depends on the size of the house some children heard their parents and others did not. Pertaining to your memory, I can imagine it has somehow left a mark on you. God took her out of her misery.
As for your father, pray for him for God took note of his actions, as He does every one else. One day, every one will receive their fair and just recompense from God as they deserve. Therefore, pray that God has forgiven him for his probably ignorance of his marital right. He too has to pray for himself and ask God forgiveness. Someone should make him wise about this even though he would not like to hear it. Better to die wisely and ask God forgiveness with a humble and contrite heart.
St. Paul said, “Whatever we do, do it with love.” We can add to this whatever we say.
Your mother is praying for all of you. God bless you!
Candie, initially i thought you were of some quality but here you lose ur support with us.( I take the liberty to speak on behalf of a few who might think the same) What does the high /top/low positions acquired by U & ur siblings have to do with RAPE in marriage? You went off at a tangent there Candie.I guess it was the opportunity(like one minute on TV 4 you).Everyone wants to be on TV DNO is like TV for you eh? LMAO
Give us a break Candie.
Abu, you have to experience it, to really have a genuine comment. I deaply applaud her. I am not 60 years old and our living conditions were not as today, and night after night my dad would come home drunk and “rape” my mom. I detested him. If she refused he would threaten her with his rifle. Even to the point where I had to fight him. He would tie her and drag her from his old pick up truck, and still she did not leave because of her 6 daughters. You don’t know the many nights I still cry recalling the pain of my mom, who is now deceased. Thanks for the Women’s Coalition, women are now better educated on places to go. My mom didn’t deserve being raped and more… So, I applaud this move to support all women.
Sweetie/ Candie/Candy wow! You know what you just did? You exposed the old police to all of DA.
Alix sounds like a bitter old woman.
She is
Are you two bitter men?
Abu, you sound like a worthless idiot. Are you actually a bad person, or merely stupid?
Nah Abu is a Sulayman, take your time and pronounce the letters. A man that is drunk, who drinks a lot of rum (Sulay-man) Sulay is drunkard in patois terms – nonesense you talking sulay, is drunk you drunk
@ Abu Sulayman
Now who are you with that name? A non-Dominican or a Dominican who turned Muslim? I do not expect any better of you and it will not please you for obvious reasons. In this case, call all women bitter. Consider if they are all bitter they have very good reasons to be based on their experience and with men like you.
Women want their rights and have to fight for it but they will all get it in time and put a spoke in those men’s wheel, as yours. 
Women are to be loved and respected. They have as much rights as men do. I realize that it is not so in the Islamic world. Well, we are residing in the Western World and we have Laws to protect them. I hope this type of Law will come into effect in Dominica and the West Indies of all and soon enough. This calls for a prayerful and peaceful demonstration or rally.
lady………i am so upset right now……….so a woman who have has sex thousands of times with a man who is also her husband is going to be so damaged if he forces himself on her her right? i agree that it is wrong but what about those numerous young girls that is being sexually assaulted by family members……….do you know how common this is ………..much too common what is wrong with these leaders…..lady if you have nothing better to do you better go clean the gutters of Roseau …..VIOLENTLY FORCED? ….please……..if a man violently forces himself on his wife …the main problem is not the sexual assault here… it simply means that he is a violent man to begin with and he has been violent towards her in other ways……….
@ tiny
Why do you not stick to the issue? It appears that you know nothing. There is a Law to protect children/teenagers against sexual abuse or abuse of any nature. If the abusers are known and are caught they will arrested and hauled before the Court. Do you not know that? Surely you should know that.
There is no Law to protect women, married or not from rape, be it by their husbands or live-in boyfriends or as it is called today, generalizing, their spouses. Smarten up or are your pretending.
Many of the comments here prove that we are just a bunch of narrow minded people, walking down our narrow minded streets! It’s always amazing how quickly we run to the bible to justify our intolerance! They are one flesh you say, yet, no one says that husbands should love their wives as Christ love the church. That would include not beating her; not tearing her down; not raping her; not treating her like she is a second-class person since – after all – she is “flesh of his flesh and bones of his bones” … right?
Many women are in abusive relationships. Some of you commenting here have friends, siblings, parents and children in these situation. Men coming home drunk, slapping you around just because and yes, rape! We cannot accept one type of wrong and condemn another! Home is suppose to be the place where you feel love and secure. For way too many women it is anything but! Wake up people!
@ Reader: I couldn’t agree more. People forget that these things happen infront of our very eyes. To hell if u dont support Alix. these are real life facts!
What about the part that says a woman should submit to her husband?
I hope am wrong but have Alix ever been married?
It seems she is a mission to destroy men especially married ones….divorce cases is one of her biggest income.
Marriage is a union a coming together to be one, some women have to stop using sex as leverage.
the same part also says, husband love ur wives as urself, and as Christ loves the church; meaning that if he wouldnt like something done to him against his wishes, he shouldnt do it to his wife. submission doesnt mean u hve to allow urself to be abused. a loving husband loves his wife enough to respect and agree with her decision not to have sex for a reason that makes sense. still a wife isnt suppose to withhold intimacy for petty reasons so as to lead her to b abused. it all boils down to, on what foundation that people build there marriages.
What about the part that says women submit to your husbands?
Marriage is a union a coming together to be one,women must stop using sex as leverage.
News flash women tear down worst than men ,much worst.
Can anyone tell me have Alix ever been married, cause it seems she has something against marriage and married men.
Divorce cases is big business for her
@ Guiness
Obviously, you are not a woman. You may stand to lose if there was such a legislation.
Maybe you should have a Guiness beer in DA and go to sleep and hopefully wake up refreshed with a clear mind.
I know Alix. Alix is a very nice person and an advocate of general rights of all.
All I will further inform you is that she means well for women and would like to see a Law enacted whereby women, especially the wives could be protected from rape in their bedrooms. Women know too well about that and what they have gone through and some are going through. No exception our mothers, grandmothers, etc., some of whom have since departed. Let us not hide it anymore and pretend that it has never occurred and is not occurring.
It is time for a change. This Law will protect all DA women, married or single. Dominica is presently behind in legislating it. DA women, some of you are in agreement with Alix. Others, I do feel that you as well. Therefore, stand up and be counted and lobby for it. Let your voice and views be heard, be it on paper. It is an important and necessary one which future generations of women will also benefit from. We must live the world a better place than we found it. It is a priority. May this Law be considered and legislated soon.
amen friend some ppl just pure stupidos. stop hitting on the lady she is speaking to protect your daughters, moms, aunties, grand mothers and cousins so shut up. mrs boyd knight job well done dear. when your daughter will be raped by her man or a man you will run to alix boyd knight to defend her in court. ……
@ Reader
It goes without saying that as contained in the Holy Bible, “Men must love their wives as Christ loves His Church.” The problem is that some of them do not read/study the Holy Bible. In any case every one is obligated to love and respect each other, whatever their status.
If men love their wives they will treat them with also the dignity which they are entitled to. Women are not animals to be treated as such. Men should have more intelligence than animals.
There are certain days and/or Sundays this Chapter of the Gospel is read. Those people, as the men, did not make it their mortal and spiritual business to study it as well and to practice what is contained in Holy Scriptures as also taught by the Church. They are the ones to be blamed if they do not know that. They had a wrong notion of what a happy married is. They made a vow when the got married. Therefore, they should be well-acquainted with the teaching of Our Lord Jesus Christ and as the Church teaches. There is no excuse whatsoever.
Do you think that God will make excuses for us if we failed to read/study and practice what is contained in Holy Scriptures and I reiterate what the Church teaches? You bet he will not make excuses for anyone nor exonerate them.
If what you are saying exist then why attact men >if the women is the ones who stays in abuse and refuses help(for all kind of reasons).saying he is nice most of the times.well he takes care of us .the list goes on not even the police dont have a case .So why not propose support programs first and raise the awareness to women .right now here is a lot of bitter women saying men are dogs and wicked.who is really wicked .the one who stays in the abuse or the one doing it
This topic is very controversial!
In this day and age that we live, women want to surpass men in everything! Women want to act like they are the head of the home… when God clearly states that the husband his the head of the home as HE is the head of the church.
Let’s not get it twisted.. there is so much that can be said….
I’m just not a supporter of Alix Boyd- Knights.. I believe that she is a feminist and she supports divorce… she encourages women to divorce their husbands…. I could go on and on and on, but …. let’s live it and that
She is a lawyer and that is how she is getting paid – looking for trouble
Why is it that Caribbean men have their heads in the sand? They have this marcho image…”men are the heads of the household” yet their personalities show different. They are out there all night,with someone else on the side, selfish,leaves the child rearing, housework etc. to the women; yet they espect to be the head of the homes. What is the woman to do??? Men get with it!! Pull up your pants and be the man that you are supposed to be if you want to be looked upon as the head of your homes!
This has nothing to do with the fact that she is a lawyer. She is also a woman.
Chris are you for real??? Can’t believe men still think that way in this day and age!!!
Yes I am for real!
A husband is the head of the home – OK. Well not in our house. We BOTH worked hard , made sacrifices, raised 2 children, so we are on EQUAL footing (sentiments echoed by hubby). No I am not a feminist, just someone who values and respects herself.
We all know of men who think that their wives/women are their property and can use/abuse them when they want. Deep down we know its wrong, but still try to justify it. I’m sure if it were to happen to a loved one, we would quickly change our views.
@ Chris
How old are you? Women want their rights. Men expect their wives to work. If both are working, bringing in the bread, bacon and ham, etc., both are the boss. The man is not superior over the woman and vice versa. Both men and women have to assume their fair share of responsibilities. Times have changed and the men must treat their wives according to the times. It is a simple as that.
I could also state that there is a reason why women want to act as head of the home, if you feel that way. Consider in bygone years wives were at the mercy of their husbands and dependent on them without a cent in their pockets. Those wives bore children, nurtured them, cooked and cleaned and catered to their husbands and children and more… Due to this, today, women want their identity and independence and to be treated as human beings.
The marriage could work as long as the men understand that they are not only the breadwinners. It should not diminish their role as a husband. Likewise the women, it should not diminish their role as wives. Need I say more?
Here you are again, a couple weeks ago, when the two guys from your village, pointe mitchel were caught for the robbery at the gas station someone asked you to comment on the issue since you always challenge others and acting Godly for which you are not,you run and hide coward, here you are again,@ this at that, wondering if any of the pointe mitchel thieves are your relative, agree to disagree, be brave and post your real identity, what about children rights, where you have a guy marrying a woman and raping her kids, or living in house with her and having kids with her under age children, this should not be women only, we need to include girls under age girls and also young boys and men, remember that men are being abuse as well, too much stereotype and one sided
Married or not the woman up until actual penetration has the right to say “NO”, she is not being a tease and any self respecting husband would not want to take it by force. What pleasure is there in having marital sex with your wife against her will. Making love rather than sex should be the goal that way your animalistic instinct would be curbed. It is not because you have a wife that she should be treated as an orifice for your satisfaction. Make love all day long instead of when you get to bed. Be nice and respectful to each other throughout the day. What man or woman would not respond to sensual touch after they have been loving each ather all day? To experience the love and security of a marriage is a gift to cherish and appreciate even if it is “your right” Slavery/subserviance/servitude takes several forms, certainly you don’t want that in your home,do you?
What is there to possibly dislike about this comment. No wonder!The Dominican culture once cherished is blatantly debased. Okay the focus of today’s comment is marital rape deal with it. Don’t negate the gravity of this problem by bringing up an even greater ill tolerated by many i.e. child sexual assault/molestation. Many will lambase me for the fact that I am a Dominican living abroad but I feel for and long for the gentler side of us. Maybe I now understand why some ex-patriates claim to be from another country. I use to boast of Dominica, how much we love each other and others but now I am embarassed and don’t want any of my coworkers to find this DNO comments and begin to judge me by a few ignorant,savage minds. Be nice to each other, men and women alike- in and out of the bedroom this is my stance. Enough said.
@ isupport
Some women have been murdered, injured and maimed because they failed to perform their so-called wifely duty. Some have gone insane as well and due to their husbands’ maltreatment of them. There is still a lot you and I do not know about those situations.
Sorry and sad to say, when a man wants sex, he wants it at any cost. A man refused by his wife/a woman, not giving in to him is no easy matter for a woman to deal with. A Law will protect her from this and a guilty conscience because she is married.
Marital rape occurs in many countries – however it involves two adults. Alix focus on the rape of the children of Dominica. My fourteen year old niece was impregnated by her mother’s boyfriend. She and her mother have children three months apart – for the same man. I called social services, called the police, screamed at the top of my lungs -nothing happened to this man. Now I heard that he has another young girl pregnant – and both my niece and her mother last week accosted this young woman in the market, making noise for this man. Lord help Dominica. EDUCATE THE MEN AND WOMEN ABOUT RAPING YOUNG CHILDREN ALIX, AND LEAVE MARITAL RAPE TO THE ADULTS!
@ Fed Up
Why did you not seek legal advice and take the man to Court? Surely the DA Law should have stepped in. I suppose if it was consensual and not reported as a rape, the Law cannot help. On the other hand if your niece is underage and it was reported, the man could have been arrested. The mother should have tried to prevent this situation from occurring.
I would not say leave marital rape to the adults. None can handle it and also well enough.
From what you stated, I visualize that DA is in dire need of a good, considerate and reliable Police Force who will take their paid duties seriously and perform them adequately. If they fail, we need to put some sense into their heads without harming them of course. No kidding! There is a way of approaching this situation.
Therefore, do you see the necessity of enacting such a Law? It is a serious matter.
wat a ting
This is getting out of hand. We have some many other more important problems to deal with in D/ca, and this is what this so highly educated lady is finding to bring to the table.
How the hell are you going to decide when what happening between a legally married couple constitute as rape.
Imagine this…… A married couple make love/have sex, soon after they have a disagreement for what ever reason….she call police claiming rape… there will be no way for the husband to defend himself since there will be all evidence to prove sexual intercourse from the wife in question.
How are we going to be able to say when the boundaries of a married couple has extended to rape? ….This is just crazy madame..
No wonder you are seen as a crazy feminist ayatollah.
I find your comment un-informed and your awareness larking.
A legal marriage is not a consent to accept abuse by one partner. When two individuals are married it dose not mean that they give up all their rights as an individual.
I am please that this topic is up for discussion because often times abused women remain silent because of comments like yours.
Yes a husband can rape his wife when he forcefully engage in sexual intercouse with her. When the wife says no not tonight or today, No means No.
For your information there is always physical evidence left behind when those types of inhumane acts are carried out on unwilling victims.
Women let your voice be heard. You have an right to protect yourself and that of your family.
I applaud Mr Alex Boyd-Knight
@ Anonymous
Are you being prejudiced? This is a highly important issue which should not be ignored or caste aside. Women are people too. If they are treated with love, dignity and respect they will be happy and therefore contribute to the happiness of their husbands, home and the world. Give this a thought.
If you become one flesh when you are married and your husband’s body becomes yours, and your wife’s body becomes yours, how can you rape yourself. I do not condone domestic violence but i do not think that there should be marital rape
Poetic metaphors such as becoming “one flesh” are a poor basis for law. Married people are still individuals with rights and wills of their own.
@ Married for years
Who are you, a man or a woman? Are you sleeping? I hope that you have been happy for years and that you did not boss your wife or husband for that matter, whatever gender you are.
Women are not to be used by men whenever they feel like, as if they are a doormat or a piece of furniture. Throughout the years women or rather wives were not treated as they deserve. A Vow was made before God and many men broke that Vow. Their attitude was/is that the wife is their personal property to be used as they so wish. This is what this article is about so that women should be treated as they deserve to be treated.
Life is not a one-way street. It is not solely a man’s world. The sooner men of today comprehend that, the better, i.e., those who object.
my advice to all women BE INDEPENDENT ……….that means don’t get married ;never know when the man will turn sour on u cuz when sugar gets old it tastes real bad!!!!!! think about it ppl.
@ juice ….u need some sugar in ur juice
@ Chris
I got a good laugh about this one.
…And a spoonful or more to sweeten it very well. There is nothing better than sweetened juice. If preferred, honey could be used which will also be healthier. 
@ juice
You make me laugh.
I would not give such an advice. The trend for some people today is cohabite. This is not a good idea and by no means a respectable one.
God ordained marriage. What has happened is that some men have abused and used their wives and maltreated them as if they were/are nobody and are inferior to them. The young men are doing the same. Due to their attitude, manner of thinking and actions, they have turned marriage into what it is not instead of what it should be, namely love and respect for their wives. Everyone should know the definition of “love” and “respect” for others and what it entails.
what is this world coming to.. how can a husband rape his wife when she has agreed in the presence of family, friends and god to love in good and on bad till death..
alix you are a feminist with a ungodly agenda, i have heard you bring up this case on numerous occasions, what would you believe would happen to an already fragile situation when not enought people are not committing to each..
prostitution would be on the rise since men would even more frightened to commit, i pay for and that is ok..
WOMAN GET A LIFE
The woman agreed to “love” in the presene of many. She did not agree to be a man’s slave or rag. Let us not get “love” and sex twisted.
Even in marriage, the woman has the right to say no. That right is sacred.
Good going, Mrs. Knights! I am with you.
Thanks you! Finally some common sense!
Love and sex are 2 completely different things. If a man truly loves and cherishes his wife or partner then there will be no need for force but if he is constantly treating her like dirt, she’s not going to have any intimate feelings towards him. That’s where force comes in. AND DON’T BE NAIVE THERE ARE SOME REAL WICKED BASTARDS OUT THERE. They will slap and kick their wives, bash her head into anything and while she’s still bleeding he will force her to have sex with him. THAT IS RAPE
So forcing your wife to have sex with you when she doesn’t want to is “godly”? Men like you are ridiculous. You want to live like animals, with no self-control or respect for others, and you have the audacity to pretend that it’s God’s will. Being a man isn’t about taking whatever you want, from your wife or anyone else. It’s about earning it and letting it go when someone says “no.” Otherwise, you are not a man, you are a spoiled child.
@ BULL-IT
I know what this name really means. They both made a Vow. Nowhere is there a stipulation in that Vow that a husband is to use and abuse his wife and make her have as much sex with him as he so wishes. Comprehend! Men in those days and today have a strange notion of a wife’s duty to her husband. Sex many times a day, week, month and year whether she likes it or not is not one of it; not part of the VOW. This is not what God meant when He blest your marriage as you made the vow, if you got married in the Church you were baptized in. This is not what marriage is all about, to have as much sex whenever they feel like. DO YOU GET IT! Men do not curb their selfish sex drive and desires. They need to pray to God to assist them. Pray to God for enlightenment.
madame speaker has a very good point!! and those women who are now members of government should represent the interest of women in dominica.
Mrs KNIGHT in the marriage ceremony we are told the 2 shall become 1. In that case how can one rape oneself? In a case like that is a he say she say how do u know who is lying? since they would have been having sex before. Lastly why are you not also concern with the wife raping the husband? Maybe this is just a disgruntle female ranting coming from you.
Would you say that if it were your daughter (or mother) being violently forced to have sex while married to some low life?. I make no excuses for the fact that any man married to my daughter and behaving like that MUST FEAR for his life – law or no law. The country may just do itself a favor by putting him beyond my reach in jail.. but that would be the least of his worries!
@britbob,
you sound like an imbicile. Violence against anyone is downright wrong. Violence against man, women, children, dog or cat is wrong. But lets be practical..an in depth analysis would have to be conducted to ascertain why sex had to be forcefully taken, if it was.
Some women uses sex as a weapon against their husband, note I said husband, I am talking about legally married people who has given full rights to and sworn their bodies to their partner.
Should a wife be charged for stealing and sent to jail if she is found taking monies out of her husband’s wallet without his consent? Absurd isn’t it?
If by law you are legally charged to supply the man’s sexual needs and are found guilty of not doing so, then what should the man do. Get another woman so you can legitimate your cause? Whether it is to have another man or what.
Once the woman is not sick or depressed or whatever, she should attend to her husband’s sexual needs. Just as once the husband is employeed he HAS to attend to his wife’s financial needs.
i couldn’t agree with you more…any low life who would think to do such things to my daughter or any female member of my family would have to thank the judge for sending him to jail because that would be the safest place for him as far as i’m concerned.
@LMAO
I cannot believe you would call someone an imbecile (note the spelling) and in the same breath want an in-depth analysis into the reason one human being would rape another. And this nonsense about sex being used as a weapon. Point 1. A guy would NEVER run his car without oil and water , good tires, regular servicing and EXPECT the car to run smoothly.. the same guy ignores his wife’s concerns (messy rowdy kids, unfair boss, unhygienic husband, threadbare clothes, empty fridge ,leaky roof, bitchy friends) and EXPECTS a perfumed pornstar in bed EVERY night.. hello??? .Point 2. If a woman is able to use sex as a weapon against a guy … it is he who has armed that weapon by his own lack of self control imho.
God gives a man a wife as a gift to help and love him him and he MUST take care of that gift .. To abuse this gift (especially in this way )is the most ungrateful sin imaginable. And I repeat .. if my daughter were to undergo this kind of torture I would be too impatient to wait for His retribution.
@ Good Ways
It goes without saying. Think beyond and not one-sided.
If per chance a woman rapes her husband, forces him to have sex with her when he is not in the mood, then he is entitled to call the Police or file a complaint against her. The Law is there to protect both the man and the woman. In most cases, the women are the ones who are oftentimes raped, forced to have sex.
I could expand on this. There must be a good reason why a man will not want to make love to his wife. Think, as women, he may also be tired. He may have a girlfriend and there are other reasons.
Interesting how women never encourage other women on this international day for women to stop the nagging, verbal abuse and insults towards their men and children! Women think it’s their right to quarrel about everything and make demands about everything. Chillax! Yes, I am female. Let us ALL improve – men and women.
Havn’t you ever hear a man quarrel with his wife and children? Well I have,right in my home,my husband used to pour on me in the presence of the children or to the children and even if I would try to defend them or me his voice was the loudest,am not saying women doesn’t quarrel with thier man but it’s a visi versa thing,that should not be
Alix Boyd-Knights I am supporting you 100%.I am a woman who do suffer, not physical abuse but financial,emotional,mental,pyschological,abuse from my estranged husband.I need help ,tell me the places to go and the people to talk to.Thank You Very Much.
How about reading your BIBLE and going to GOD! thats a great start
What is mamselle problem??! Stupes! Why she cannot talk about women unemployment, women cant feed thier children,cant send them to school for the whole day because no money for lunch, cant provide educational needs for children. Get real woman!!
women who are not employed, do not want to be,those that cannot feed their children,cannot send them to school for a day because no money for lunch,can’t provide educational needs for children does not want to yet is these type of women who has the most expensive cell phones,marpin or S A T at their home,sexiest dressing with makeup and hairdo’s always at KFC,Perky’s,Subway,Patty Shack or Pizza Hut. When SALE,TOPUP, where they taking or getting money for that yet have no money for thier own child let them fool all you.Is what they want to do with money they do,they doesn’t care about the children,they use the children for excuses.
why u straying from the subject? keep to the subject at hand please so that you can make a constructive discus
I know a woman (married living with her husband) who did not but a single uniforms for her kids last year; send them to school in short tight uniforms that washed once a week cause they only had one. Yet still every month she doing her hair and nails, both of them have blackberry; they have cable, always out for lunch.dinner, liming…all kinds of things. And trust me, none of you dressing more sexy than the woman. Some of them women just plain wicked. All they care about is looking good for man and not about the children.
She DOES talk about these things and DOES advocate for women and children generally. Today, however, being a day set aside by United Nations to reject violence against women, the lady was giving a message on that specific topic in her capacity as Chairperson of the Commonwealth Women’s Parliamentarians (CWP). Please go to the Commonwealth Parliamentary Association’s website http://www.cpahq.org where you can read her entire message. You will find her message as you open the site. Thank you.
karma thank you help me make sense in those bougarars head. where ignorance is bliss it’s funny to be wise.
@ RAW
You speak of women who cannot feed their children? How many children do they have and with how many men – out of marriage? Do not blame others for their negligence and sins. Women must also be responsible. They have only themselves to blame and if they have children out of wedlock with a man or with different men who are irresponsible.
If the men do not bear their fatherly responsibilities, the women should take them to Court. Furthermore, there is the DA Social Services where they could get financial help.