DEAR BELLA: I cheated with my sister’s boyfriend

Dear Bella

How do I come clean with my sister and tell her that me and her boyfriend are now an “item”. My sister was stricken with diabetes a few years ago and she has been very “cold”. She and “Danny” (not his real name) have been together for a few years. They have two children.
Anyway to cut the long story short, she has been withholding sex from him because she claims to have no feelings.
I have heard diabetes can do that to you. Once he came over to drop off my niece and nephew because my sister wasn’t feeling well. They were upstairs watching TV and he was talking to me about how things are between them and how it had been months since they were together. I felt sorry and held him. When we released each other we kissed and we ended up in bed.
I feel horrible. I love my sister. I made a mistake. Someone told me to just die with the secret but it torments me. I don’t sleep at nights and I want to be free from this bondage. What should I do?
Sad sister
………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………
Hello sad sister,
Everything you have just explained to me should really be told to your sister. If you believe telling her is the only way to be free from the “bondage” then I guess you must move towards obtaining your freedom. If you are truly sorry, I believe you sister can forgive you but the backlash is something you must prepare for.
You see; all the odds are against you. Your sister is sick with diabetes and that alone makes you seem very wicked.
But I’m not here to condemn you because your mistakes are no worse than many of the critics who will come and bash you here. What you did was bad. Terrible, actually, but confessing to your sister is probably the first step to right the wrong you did.
I would made a remark about her boyfriend but right now, you are the one who appears to be struggling with your  disloyal behaviour.
Best,
Bella

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20 Comments

  1. waypapa
    August 22, 2018

    Well this one takes the cake with sister coming here to answer. I bet is not any sister but a beffy person. First time I approve of Bella’s response. All you calling her names and judging but some of you even your step father you will slice :mrgreen:

    Best I can say you made a mistake, move on and try not to repeat it.

  2. Look it
    August 22, 2018

    Just the other Day my panda tell me How he knock up with his girlfriend sista. I wonder If is the same dude. He did not feed any remorse so my dear If is you….. live your life. My panda say he Saw Stars.

  3. playboy
    August 22, 2018

    Why all the great sympathy because the sister has diabetes? You would think the woman has terminal cancer or something!!!!
    And BELLA, it is not “mistakes are no worst,” it is mistakes are no WORSE. Simple English that 99% of Dominicans can’t seem to get. Bad, worse , worst.

    • Amour Green
      October 31, 2018

      Bella said mistakes are no worse!!!! you are correcting something that does not need correcting well papa
      smdh you well sort. Ease up on yourself pal :mrgreen:

  4. zeb
    August 21, 2018

    why is she so guilty and remorseful when in the first sentence she plainly states “me and her boyfriend ARE NOW AN ITEM”

  5. marie-claire R Skerrit
    August 21, 2018

    Sal to Sel. You’re a nasty woman. Nuff said

  6. My name
    August 21, 2018

    You should be helping your sister to better health. This sickness causes depression help her with her diet and exercise and prayer and sisterly love. She can feel better just needs help. Telling her is going to make her feel worse

  7. Moi
    August 21, 2018

    I feel horrible. I love my sister. I made a mistake. Someone told me to just die with the secret but it torments me. I don’t sleep at nights and I want to be free from this bondage. What should I do?

    People say if something makes you sick, take it again. So give him some more and then run for your life

  8. Horny
    August 21, 2018

    Look like you do not have a man u NUT lol!
    if you do does your guy have high blood pressure diabetes and gout?
    so the only two who have feelings are U and ur brother in-law? what about that big German Sheppard dog you have there? It has diabetes too. Your brother in-law must got test himself for doggy diseass.

  9. Trevon
    August 21, 2018

    Bella must be a roots girl. She real as ever. I like her vibes. We don’t need no psychological shinanagan…we want it Dominican palance. Great job bella keep it up. We need a free up

  10. DA Fails
    August 21, 2018

    Bella always trying to get the juiciest stories, keep it up :lol: but me and u kno D/a have even better toro than dat :wink:

  11. Peace
    August 21, 2018

    Sad Sister, I am not going to bash you for sleeping with your sister’s boyfriend. You’re grown! He grown! That’s was your choice and his. BUT … if I am reading this correctly, are you saying you did the deed with your sister’s kids upstairs .. in the same house?? If yes, then you have much bigger issues.

  12. Sister not
    August 21, 2018

    I knew something was goin on with you all..I really had to find out here..Then you call yourself a sister? Pathetic!! You should be ashamed of yourself, the both of you. You really have no heart seeing my children were there smh. YOU ARE NO SISTER OF MINE!

    • ??????????
      August 21, 2018

      “My sister was stricken with diabetes a few years ago and she has been very “cold”. She and “Danny” (not his real name) have been together for a few years. They have two children.”The article should have been edited. Too many leads so if you are the sister I am sure you can identify .. Anyway to cut the long story short, she has been withholding sex from him because she claims to have no feelings.I have heard diabetes can do that to you. Once he came over to drop off my niece and nephew because my sister wasn’t feeling well. They were upstairs watching TV and he was talking to me about how things are between them and how it had been months since they were together. I felt sorry and held him. When we released each other we kissed and we ended up in bed. So many leads that the sister can identify that it relates to her.

      In future Bella, edit the stories. I am sure that the sister knows it through your column as indicated by Sister Not. Sister Not please forgive her as she is…

      • Zortoesot
        August 21, 2018

        So allu dunno bella making up her own stories den

    • ?????????
      August 21, 2018

      Also do not hate your sister. Sympathy to someone and in the twinkle of an eye, things can happen as she said. but the most important fact is she is wretched so ease up and do not carry anything that will cause you to sick more than you are. Foolishness happen but God forgives us so you must forgive them. That is why we have to be linked in with Christ. The temptations will be thwarted just as it comes thru the Holy Spirit. I do not condemn them but I say to them Repent and do this no more and let this be a learning experience.

      Bella edit in future. Please do not leave all those leads. Example it should day sick instead of diabetes. The upstairs of the house should not be mentioned. The number of children should not have been mentioned. Neice and Nephew also and other leads.

  13. Ya Boy
    August 21, 2018

    Choops! Allu Getting Worse Wi. :-?
    Bella You Aself, Need To Take It Easy,Smh :roll:

  14. roots
    August 21, 2018

    Aahhhhhh fire ohhhhhhh firrrre,aaahhhhh how can you do that to your sister,aaaaahhhhhhh

  15. zandoli
    August 21, 2018

    Has anyone encountered a more judgmental advice columnist than Bella? I would be surprised if Bella had any training in that area.

    • Peace
      August 21, 2018

      Did Bella ever said she was “trained”? Bella giving it to you the way your aunty would give it to you. Ease up on Bells.

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