Love is blind

Dear Bella: I’m a 24-year-old female and have been in a relationship for the past six years. My boyfriend andI have been living together for the past four years. We have had our issues but now I think it is getting out of control.

I forgave him once because he lied and cheated; it’s only because I love him. But now I realize that he has an 18-year-old female friend calling him every day. Keep in mind that he is 38 years old and has a 15-year-old daughter. He can be this child father.

Bella, I have told him about it and he refuse to tell this child to respect our relationship since she have been calling him all odd hours of the night.

What should I do since he don’t want to put an end to it?

Please help.

Dear Miss:

My simple advice is that leave that man if he persists. It shows he has no respect for you and he probably has gotten tired of you. He has cheated on you before. Apparently he is having an open affair right in front your eyes. It is probably a nice way of saying “I don’t want you anymore”.

Miss if you can’t see the signs then you must be love blind.

It is time to do a new transition: a transition out of this house and out of his life.

Bella

Do you have a problem? Write to Dear Bella at bella@dominicanewsonline.com. Dear Bella is published every Monday and Friday. All letters are subject to editing and the editor has the right to not publish an article if it does not meet the company’s editorial standards. Also, the advice given is not necessarily expert advice, and is basically an opinion, therefore we accept no liability that result from giving any opinion, and by reading this column you agree to indemnify us from any such liability. We encourage you to seek the advice of a professional counselor.

Disclaimer: The comments on this page do not necessarily reflect the views of DominicaNewsOnline.com/Duravision Inc. All comments are approved by DominicaNewsOnline.com before they are posted. We never censor based on political or ideological points of view, but we do try to maintain a sensible balance between free speech and responsible moderating.

We will delete comments that:

  • violate or infringe the rights of any person, are defamatory or harassing or include personal attacks
  • are abusive, profane or offensive
  • contain material which violates or encourages others to violate any applicable law
  • promote hatred of any kind
  • refer to people arrested or charged with a crime as though they had been found guilty
  • contain links to "chain letters", pornographic or obscene movies or graphic images
  • are excessively long and off-message

See our full comment/user policy/agreement.

23 Comments

  1. mamo
    January 1, 2012

    Run gal ,see this man knows that you don’t have the. balls to leave him,you are a reserved cake thats gone stale and he eats eat when he cant find fresh cake

  2. queenie
    May 25, 2011

    woman
    in your case, love is not blind

    you just retarded………dats all………

    living with a man all that time with no commitment? living in sin?
    the first time he cheated, you should have kicked him out, so u are 2 blame

    “if a man deceive you once shame on him; if twice shame on u”

  3. borndominican america
    January 19, 2010

    love is blind..a true statement, espeacially for the 12-17 years babies ,these hard back adults sexually abusing and raping in dominica and no one coming forward or doing anything about it.
    i visited dominica last year for canival for the first time and was shock to see so many under ager kids drinking berr and at clubs.the government is looking at the unimportant stuff in dominica and not forcucusing on the future generation in dominica.the adult are brain washing these kids mine with “I LOVE U “shit. i visted meny village , such as laplain, carib territory, morne jaune , paix bouche , the valley and lord, i pray for a change.
    hard drugs, are sold to kids.what the hell the cops doing….raping of an under age is not accepted in any part of the world, which means the government is close eyes to such and i wonder y.
    i hang out with guy who i told this is wrong.

    tell me dominican if i am wrong to care for my people since i consider myself a dominican?

  4. Anonymous
    January 19, 2010

    A watttttttttttttttt? i can’t believe my eyes women out there no more time 2 take man crap LOVE WHAT!!! love blind and letting him use u as a door mat women out there all the females we aint gonnah b taken advantage of no more nah nah nah not this day and age

  5. SADAM HUSSEIN
    January 19, 2010

    lol.i dont know anything about the story i just try to add a little salt and pepper

  6. January 19, 2010

    Sweety LOVE with you eyes and ears………….Never become too complaisant in any relationship…………make sure that you are INDEPENDENT………and always ensure that you remain MARKETABLE………..

    • March 21, 2010

      I think i have some suggesttions which are useful such as : You can overcome all problems if you try to be patient, sensible and sincere with each other. At first you should calm down and assess the situation. Remind your first date, wedding, moments you were happy together and try to write down all things and features that you like and dislike into your partner. Don’t lie to yourself; this list is only for you, so you should be honest with yourself. Try to find main reasons why you want to save your marriage and what caused problems into your family life. It’s rather difficult task to save your marriage, so you should be ready to hard work.

      how to get your ex back

  7. January 19, 2010

    Only because you love him? LOVE………There is no way im taking this crap from a man ……..i would be gone with the wind long time…………….This means all through the relationship he was doing the same thing………..no respect………gurl just pack you bags and go……..u deserve better.

  8. January 19, 2010

    IF HE DONT WANT TO PUT AND TO IT———.END IT FOR HIM! LICK UR WOUNDS AND MOVE ON.HE CANT HAVE HIS CAKE AND EAT IT! BUT ALWAYS REMEMBER ” HE WHO CHEATS WITH U WILL CHEAT ON U”

    ALL THAT TIME HE WITH YOU A NEVER MARRY U! mY GIRL ANYTIME A MAN WITH YOU FOR MORE THAN 2 YEARS AND HE DOH MARRY U …hise ur anker and move on……….SIMPLE AS THAT!

  9. blackheart
    January 18, 2010

    Respect to one´s mate is one of the pinnacle of a successful or unsuccessful relationship. but then again many times in relationship people do what makes then happy. so let s be a a little realistic. and 18 year old woman in the Caribbean , is well beyond mature, a 38 0r 43 year man , well lets talk midlife crisis, proving he still has it. although he has no need to disrespect you to show that. there are a few things we can take into consideration. 1.is the man content in the relationship.2.have you asked him if he wants to end it or not. 3. confrontation in these situation is gonna make him more adamant about what he wants to do. 4. have you seek mature or professional help in this situation.one of the things that you should also be aware , if what the above statements say , are true , you would have already know exactly at what point your relationship with this man is at , you can either fight it or accept it, you are the one to decide.

    blackheart

  10. JAILBIRD
    January 18, 2010

    girl “wat goes around comes around”. you didn’t think when you took him form the other woman six years ago he wouldn’t do you the same thing? well bien! now you see when the dog bite you in the ass..chile he was cheating on you the whole time.SOT..just ask SADDAM HUSSEIN..HAHA…o well leave with it now..now your ass is in the hot seat..well d woman you take him form is on the side line laughing at you now because always know he was a low life..anybody just ask me

  11. unknown
    January 18, 2010

    aaa

  12. unknown
    January 18, 2010

    but tm bear in mind dat they have been together for 6years so dat means d guy was only 32 and this young lady was 12 and yes u right the girlfriend was indeed 18 my advise to d 24year old is bit this 18 year old A** make her repect ur man lol
    dont do dat na my girl u will get in trouble and im sure this jack a** is not worth it. you are young im sure in due time u will get a man to love and respect u like he is suppose to.
    So park ur bags and just walk out on him tell him its ova u dont have time for this games.
    Good luck my girl hope u get someone better!!!!

  13. tm
    January 18, 2010

    But honestly, I don’t understand why you are complaining about your boyfriend being with an 18 year old girl. Your situation was no different since you claim to have hooked up with him six years ago. You are now 24 so for those of us who can do math well, it means that he had you at 18 too. Apparently, the number 18 is getting a bit boring so the low-life you are so crazy about is amusing himself with younger girls right now.

    Yound lady, do yourself a favour. Respect yourself and love yourself more than you love a man.

  14. January 18, 2010

    it looking live love is blind, deaf and dumb wi. how u want it again nuh? smoke signals?!

    you have been replaced! He don’t want to see your face!

  15. Irie
    January 18, 2010

    eh bien mister coal pot have plenty fire, you 24 and he still go and get one even younger than you to demoutay his donkey….eh bien that man must be a sugar factory, for you to be still there making your life miserable when its is clear de man doh want you again…..epay femme toh sot eh. All you have to do is get a man younger than him and let him make his eyes boil his peas.

  16. ha
    January 18, 2010

    well the gurl is 18…shes not a kid n e more shes a woman….stop acting so premature in the mind becuse the gurl he is clearly cheatin on you with is grown! secondly yh idk y u ra *s still der wen he clearly cheating and your hurting. u must love the hurting feeling he is giving you for ur stubborn self to stay…..

  17. Sincere
    January 18, 2010

    If this man has no repect for this young child, what makes u think he is mature enough to respect u and how u feel about him. Also, he is having relations with a child that is almost as young as his daughter. this man has no respect. i hope he is not looking at your daughter in these ways too.

  18. steve
    January 18, 2010

    Where in the world can any woman find a man that will never cheat ????? Even the men thats tough on the eye cheats.

  19. $uper$aver
    January 18, 2010

    Well girl 1) you know the saying, “why but the cow when you can get the milk for free” 2)never date a man for longer than three years without a commitment, and 3) kick him out.. you may love him, but until you leave him and find you a man that will love you only you will never know what it is to love a real man. Child that man is lying to you through his teeth.. just listen to SADDAM HUSSEIN apparently SADDAM konws him so see he is even lying about his age and his daughters age.

    next this little dominicans girls like men that can be their father they never know when to back off and if you beat her **then people will talk..so call me and i will beat her for you and teach her a lesson she will never forget.. D LITTLE POLOKET..trust me i have been through my share

  20. Heh
    January 18, 2010

    well sadam how you know all that, I guess this story is fake because u seem pretty much like a man to me.

  21. SADAM HUSSEIN
    January 18, 2010

    correction ..he is 43 years old not 38 .he is not only a cheater he is a liar to, and his daughter is 16 not 15

  22. mouth of the south
    January 18, 2010

    bella i believe u must write an article on “the perfect man”,,,,, cause i sure know i am lol n i single,,,,,, ladies keep falling for the wrong guys over n over,,,,,, but u know maybe dem man know d game better,,,,,,, so i guess u must write an article about the characteristics of a man u’d suggest to ur daughters if any and/or relatives n friends

    n also u can do one on women also,,,, for us men who may not see somethings that u do!!!!

Post a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

:) :-D :wink: :( 8-O :lol: :-| :cry: 8) :-? :-P :-x :?: :oops: :twisted: :mrgreen: more »

 characters available