Please shut the hell up

I am back and so what? And I never asked for the applause.

Anyway, I want to talk about women (well that’s all I talk about anyway).  I remember telling you guys in a post last year that you can’t trust anything a woman says, but more so I would like to touch on the topic about women and their mouths. Yes, their bocas. No, not about their teeth, tongue, breath…

Women simply chat too much.

Never believe a woman when she assures you that she will keep a secret, because she cannot, at least for long. Somebody has to know – her mother, sister, cousin, best girlfriend or some maco (man who act like woman).

Yes, and I say this because women get me in trouble so many times because of their mouth, and even with evidence they will tell you it “wasn’t me”. So who else if it’s only you I tell? Gees.

On top of that, women like to twist stories to suit their audience (yea a group of girls who have nothing to do but “pung beff”).

Once, I was communicating with this girl. Yes she had a man. It was just light communication, nothing serious. But knowing who her man is I told her not to let him know that we talk because he is a psycho because I heard he followed a dude everywhere for two months after overhearing he likes her woman.

Anyway, the darn girl assured me she wouldn’t even say anything to her shadow. So for weeks we talked cool, nothing intimate. Then one day out the blue I get a text: “Why the **** you checking my girl?”

At first I thought it was the wrong message, but the person knew my name, where I live and all kinds of ***. I was still puzzled because I don’t know who it was. He didn’t identify his woman. I remember my friend and our secret pact but I said “nah she wouldn’t do that”. But I didn’t answer mister other than telling him he got the wrong number.

Yea right.

The next day mamzel called me and asked if a man text me about troubling his woman. I told her yes but it seemed like a wrong number.

“No, no, no, it’s my boyfriend wi,” she said.

I was shocked nuh ***.

“So how the hell your boyfriend get my number, know my name, address and **?” I asked.

Guess what she said? “I don’t know wi.”

I was pissed. I hung up the phone and never spoke to that girl again. Well the dude never text me again because he probably was content with what I told him. But even if he isn’t he had no reason to worry because I wasn’t grinding his girl and had no intentions to but I know dudes are jealous.

But after investigations, I realised that mamzel told her best friend who end up spreading the news till it reach back to her boyfriend “as a rumour.”

I learned two things from that incident: 1. never trust women to keep a secret 2. where there is smoke there is fire (every rumour has some truth).

Women just talk too much. They can’t keep a secret. They must tell someone. Don’t believe her when she tells you that she doesn’t speak to anyone about the relationship. Lie! She has a maco or some cousin she telling.

You may not find out now, but somehow down the road you will.

That’s why girls love to be around each other because they like to talk about people. A woman will sacrifice almost anything to chill with her girls because they love to talk about their little dirty secrets.

Well, men we are like that too, we like to kicks off and talk about our bedroom exploits (not me though) but the women somehow do it slicker than us.

Before I go let me leave you with this video by Chris Rock about who is the biggest liar. CLICK HERE

Enjoy! And see you next week.

Nice Guy is written by an A-Hole so don’t take him on. He has woman issues and would like some help (writing is his therapy). He is also seeking a Nice Girl to compliment his column. He can be reached at nicestguyonline@gmail.com.

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17 Comments

  1. jane
    November 4, 2011

    this is old but u sound like u hate women its true we are not perfect but we are not meant to be perfect and everything u say about us we can say twice about u.

  2. is true
    June 22, 2010

    but he not yet lie at all

  3. *Douces*
    March 7, 2010

    Lol seriously…BEFF NEWS needs to give me an article…i swear, this guy is like all guys—theres more sense coming out of his downstairs than his upstairs lol; (no offence, since i dont even know u like that)…All i’m saying is from this article, you represent the unfortunate majority of men who accuse women of doing things that they do religiously. WOMEN talk? lol oh really? How about men, now THOSE have some snappy mouths. Girls, if you’re going to tell a secret to a guy, at least put some good advertising in there – trust me it will get around faster than any DBS radio ad….

    I mean, girls, we do talk, its our bonding ritual. But, aren’t we women?? From slavery days, its what we do. We’re still working on emancipating ourselves from the mental slavery…..so whats YOUR excuse?? A man is supposed to be *cough cough* loyal, trustworthy, and dependable…but hey, this is Dominica! Who cares about that right? If you’re a man and you wanna know something about a girl, do you ask her? NO! You go right ahead to the next of kin, most recent enemy or even a convenient passerby who might probably just happen to know a “sipcion” and boom! Word is gospel truth.

    Moral of the story…if you live in a 2 by 4 recycled-glass house with paper thin walls and got no insurance….dont throw stones guys!

    Signed, Nice Guy’s Most Worthy Opponent

  4. truth
    January 20, 2010

    think of what u said….the first thing you said was that U KNOW THE WOMAN MAN MACO couldnt it be that he went into her phone and saw that u were calling.

    yes i agree women like to talk BUT when man maco they maco.

    i wouldnt be suprise if he went into the woman phone…sometimes we have to look at thing in a whole

  5. January 16, 2010

    Gason is true self….I am a woman….and one thing I don’t do is tell other woman my business…..certain things yes…but other things I keep to myself…..cuz I knw when they get vex with u the first thing they wll wnt to do is put ur business outside besides I just don’t trust ppl like that. Woman too like to talk….

  6. January 15, 2010

    Excellent work on this article. It make for an interesting and easy read.

  7. Muslim_Always
    January 15, 2010

    A person’s experience cannot become a ruling on the issue with regards to women, it is not healthy to generalise or allow it to appear that it’s every woman. The problem is gossip and slander has become the thing of people who have no values, bottom line.

  8. .............
    January 15, 2010

    You aren’t only an ** but a dumbie! written by a woman to a neanderthal!

  9. mouth of the south
    January 15, 2010

    I SUPPORT NICE GUY 99.9%,,,, JUS BECAUSE IT HAVE A 1% GENUINE WOMAN DEM DAT CAN HOLD A SECRET BUT WOMEN LOVE TO TALK ALL THEIR PERSONAL BUSINESS WITH DERE FRIENDS,,,, ESPECIALLY DEM MARCO FRIENDS DEY HAVE,,, I CANNOT STAND DEM MARCO FRIENDS,,,, EVEN TRYING TO MAKE U JEALOUS WHEN THEY CHILLING WIT UR WOMAN,,,,,I DOH TRUST DEM MARCO FRIENDS AT ALL,,, ONCE HE HAVE A PENIS HE IS A THREAT,,, DEM MARCO MAN BECOME THE SOLACE FOR UR WOMAN WHEN SHE HAVE PROBLEMS N U KNOW THE MARCO WILL NEVER TAKE ON THE MAN SIDE,,,, SO THEY TAKE ADVANTAGE OF UR WOMAN BEING SCORN AND THEY EVEN FOR ONCE GET A LIL TASTE,,,, I WILL K.O A MARCO IF HE CROSS D LINE,,,, WHEN UR WOMAN TELL THE MARCO ALL UR BUSINESS,,, HE READY TO GIVE U TALK,,,,,

  10. citizen
    January 15, 2010

    mr nice i really miss you welcome back hahahaha

  11. Paparazzi
    January 15, 2010

    Talk is how the Bible was created. Persons have spoken in the beginning and till the end. Sometimes the talk is great especiall y with the majority of cheating, nasty men that unfortunately making up the male population of DA. So talk must come back to those women who trying their best to maek the relationship work and have dogzzzzzzzzzzz for men..psssssssssshh.Dem just a different breed.

    Walk and live; Talk and bomboclat fi dead.(D next woman and the cheating boyfriend) Talk eh girlss sell their a$$e$ out!!!!.

  12. Vybez
    January 15, 2010

    Welcum back Karkabeff, happy new year!

  13. January 15, 2010

    welcome back nice guy………i agree with wat u say there are some women dat chat too much but u make it look like its ALL women..I am a woman.. yes we like to chill with our girls and chat…but i know how to keep a secret and i dont discuss my personal biz dat much and if i do its nt with any of my girls…it has to be de one i trust de most.

  14. d/can in j/a
    January 15, 2010

    leave d man woman alone lol

  15. Wait and See
    January 15, 2010

    You know you are to a certain extent correct about the women but that is generally the culture of American women white or black. That if it does happen in Dominica is rare and most likely copied from the American system.

    I had the recent experience of where a male friend came to my house and told my brother that he is going to share something with him but don’t go back and say that he was the one who said it. Fine…a day or so later the person that was being talked about showed up in our area…and instead of my brother saying “can I talk to you a while?’ he stayed on the porch and shouted to the person all the details and I felt terribly embarrassed because it was a man doing such a thing. I explained to him that perhaps he should have waited for the person to enter the house where they spoke previously in the first place. The person had the decency to come to my brother and speak in private yet my brother whom I expected the better off. So women aren’t the only culprits here. Interestingly I have very few persons as friends and two of them are married men..and yes they both reside in other countries so I get foreign beff…hahahaha

  16. Karkabeff
    January 15, 2010

    u are sooo right

    • madhead
      March 19, 2010

      every body that agree to wat mister say is gays. no offence. he is only sayin that bcuz he cant get woman. WAT F**K DOE TRUST THEM.

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