Rescue men and boys from gender and societal war

Are our black men losing face? Should we have bumper stickers with colorful slogans such as ‘SAVE OUR MALES’? The problem of lack of progress of black boys and young men has become evident, not only in Dominica and the rest of the Caribbean, but also in Europe and North America. Most social scientists and gender researchers will tell you that they are worried about this new Y-chromosome (male) crop. Due to modern day dynamics and other more complicated issues, a frightening and alarmingly large percentage of our young men unfortunately are losing their way.

Invariably, there are more questions than answers to this disturbing trend. Predictably, the pendulum of cultural correction may have gone too far and now needs to come back towards center. While we are aware that there needs to be a larger forum and a new sense of order for exploring the broader strategies for dealing with his massive issue,we want to be practical and realistic. The home and fathers (daddies) need to be at the forefront of this larger discussion.

Therefore, our strategy should be to begin with a project that is hands-on, product/results -oriented that fulfills and mitigates need in Dominica. Our hope is that this project will lead to broader collaborations among artists, business personnel, promoters, scholars, law enforcers, educators, writers, and archivists, activists at home and in the diaspora.

Girls and young women are winning; boys and young men are losing. The Y-chromosome crop desperately needs to be saved. The fact of the matter is that in recent years, girls and young women have moved ahead in every field and discipline except sports.

Today, a much larger percentage of women in our communities are thriving, happy, well adjusted and are making huge deserved strides. Increasingly, boys and young men have slipped (and are slipping) through the cracks. The societal costs of this time bomb will be monumental. This trend should not only be of concern to law and policy makers, but also to parents with young daughters. How often have you heard a ‘sistah’ say, ‘there are no (eligible) men, or in the dating game there are ‘slim pickings’?

Regardless of which side of the issue you fall on, it is fair to say that an alarmingly increasing number of our men have neglected some of their basic responsibilities. The ‘sisterhood’ and ‘motherhood’ should not give up on the ‘brothers’, at least, not just yet. Our failures and weaknesses are also your failures. The task of getting our men and boys ‘in line’ belongs to all of us.  ‘Lock em’ up in jail and throw away the keys should not be a one size fits all approach and option.

Despite it all, I find it exciting to reflect on the varied, interesting, exciting and controversial currents that swirl around the lives of girls, young women, married and soccer moms (as my wife is) as they balance professional and family responsibilities including transporting their kids to piano lessons and soccer games and look to the challenges and tasks that lie ahead.

It is unwise for anyone to conclude that increased successes of women and girls (X- Chromosomes) could mean the disempowerment and marginalization of their male counterparts. On the contrary, men should embrace, appreciate and encourage women more, and strive to be more of an integral part of their teams, personal, romantic and professional lives. In order to do so they have to work harder and be more disciplined.

It is no fun for the’sistahs’ to face these exciting and challenging times alone. Indeed, we need them to be on our sides, but at the end of the day it is incumbent on us men and boys to get it together.

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11 Comments

  1. Samuel Christian
    March 22, 2023

    Brilliant article Dr. Finn! Simply brilliant…

    You said what need saying. Insightful comments, I must say.

  2. Concerned Citizen
    April 25, 2012

    That should be a very worrying sign for society. Men need women as women need men i.e without men we do not have a society. Also the very things we think as strides and success in society is the very thing that destroys it. What is success? Happiness does not depend on the “so called success” and material things in life.

  3. D D D
    April 25, 2012

    I am so tired of people depending on Govt. for change. I strongly beleive that society depends on govt to much what about striving to do better on your own. So what you don’t get supprot from Govt. to raise your child? Did Govt. ask you to have a child. I also beleive that had society stick to the bible having sex or children in wedlock most of our children would have fathers in the home or at least know who their fathers are. Although marriage doesn’t keep a man it is an example of responsibility for our young men. Secondly we have lost our goals as society and that is to raise children to be the best they can possibly be. What happen to the young girl who has a child and can’t take care of that child and society jump in and help encourage that child to finish school rather than blacklist her. Or the young man selling drugs because he cannot afford food to eat society offering him a plate of food. Also as mentioned above Dominica has immitating the American lifestyle therefore we as parents need to teach our children that the “thug-ish” lifestyle is just a way to keep our black men down.

  4. UDOHREADYET
    April 25, 2012

    Everything that a man does is to please women whether it’s to attain his personal pleasure or to make her/their lives easier. The social dynamic between women and men has changed significantly over the last 20 years. Young men are doing the things and behaving in ways that the young ladies find attractive unfortunately that type of attraction is temporary as young men don’t realize that women change their minds and attitudes like the wind changes direction. On the other end women are taking on male roles because they for whatever reason have started imitating men but hear this; ‘women do not find it difficult nowadays to behave like men, but find it extremely difficult to behave like Gentlemen’ if you catch my drift. These are the facts. Men haven’t changed, the women changed and its f’ing up the flow of things. I don’t know the answer but I know we are heading in the wrong direction.

  5. ken
    April 25, 2012

    High School Dropout Rates by Sex

    Chakademus maybe this can help:

    Percentage of Dropouts from 1960–2009
    The percentage of high school dropouts, ages 16-24, has declined since 1960. The percentage of male students who dropped out of high school has decreased from 27.8% in 1960 to 9.1% in 2009. The percentage of female dropouts has decreased from 26.7% to 7.0%.
    Year Total Male Female
    1960 27.2% 27.8% 26.7%
    1970 15.0 14.2 15.7
    1980 14.1 15.1 13.1
    1985 12.6 13.4 11.8
    1990 12.1 12.3 11.8
    1992 11.0 11.3 10.7
    1993 11.0 11.2 10.9
    1994 11.4 12.3 10.6
    1995 12.0 12.2 11.7
    1996 11.1 11.4 10.9
    1997 11.0 11.9 10.1
    1998 11.8 13.3 10.3
    1999 11.2 11.9 10.5
    2000 10.9 12.0 9.9
    2001 10.7 12.2 9.3
    2002 10.5 11.8 9.2
    2003 9.9 11.3 8.4
    2004 10.3 11.6 9.0
    2005 9.4 10.8 8.0
    2006 9.3 10.3 8.3
    2007 8.7 9.8 7.7
    2008 8.0 8.5 7.5
    2009 8.1 9.1 7.0

    Source: U.S. Dept. of Education, National Center for Education Statistics, Digest of Education Statistics.

    Read more: High School Dropout Rates by Gender, 1960–2009 — Infoplease.com http://www.infoplease.com/ipa/A0779196.html#ixzz1t3jeAsLJ

    • Chakademus
      April 25, 2012

      Thanks Ken, now we have some empirical evidence to chew on. Young men are still dropping out of high school at a slightly higher rate than young women. Is a difference of 2.1% statistically significant? I don’t know, but they are both making progress towards staying in school.
      Other than that, why on earth do you people feel that it is okay to just dump on black men and criticize us so? Like it is open season! Don’t you all realize that by all these postings you all are propagating the negative stereotypes? Falling into the evil trap of blacklisting our men and destroying our black community. 27.8% of boys used to drop out of high school, now it’s 9.1% That is a positive thing, why is it that all we hear about is the bad stuff? I don’t like pants on the ground either but should I go around badmouthing my sons and nephews? Are the women always perfect? Is bad behavior really so lopsided in our society? There will always be some people who flaunt bad behavior and by it’s very nature that is more visible but look around you! See all the young men gainfully employed. Give the brothers some props instead of highlighting the vieux negres! Tonneh man, I tired of the negativity!

  6. April 25, 2012

    BLACK MEN NEEDS TO MAN UP ,FACE AND TAKE THEIR RESPONSIBILITIES .STOP BEING LAZY BECAUSE IN DOMINICA THEIR ARE MORE WOMEN WHO TAKES CARE OF THE CHILDREN WITHOUT THE FATHERS HELP …GOV’T NEEDS TO PROVIDE MORE FREE TRAINING TO THE YOUTH SO THAT THEY CAN BECOME RESPONSIBLE PARENTS BY PROVIDING THEIR CHILDREN’S EVERY DAY NEEDS.

    • Common Sense
      April 26, 2012

      Everything cannot be the government’s responsibility. If a man is serious about getting somewhere in life, he will see to it that he has honestly acquired education or skills required of him. Then, he will find a good woman, get married and be a good citizen. If you are trying to please the Lord, everything will fall in line.

  7. April 25, 2012

    Very good article. I am having a very hard tme understanding our young men of today. Trying to rap my head around their mindset and where it is that they want to go with their so called mordern day dress-codes and approach towards society.
    Where did this ear-ring wearing for young boys come from? why is it that all of them think that they need to wear an ear ring to “fit-in?” Pants on bottom? the use of the “N” word? Who is going to hire these guys looking like that?
    The white mideia will push that lifestyle for young black men because they know that it is not productive and as such will “keep them down.”
    while innocent black carribean boys will see these pictures and think this is the way to go. Many a times i have cautioned family members about this false advertising.
    Let’s teach our young men to do the right thing.

  8. Chakademus
    April 25, 2012

    What do you mean “Girls and young women are winning; boys and young men are losing”? Can you give some examples? Do you have statistics to back up your rhetoric? I am tired of these types of assertions, words which sound profound but are they even based on facts? What I know is true is that for many years now it has been fashionable for pundits and prognosticators to dump on us men.
    How are we losing? If our women progress does it automatically mean that we are losing? Is life a competition?
    Look at our political leadership, what is the gender balance? How about the top ranks of the public service, how many males, how many females? Owners/managers of business enterprises, how many male/female? College graduates… You get my point.
    We are not convinced by your skillful use of rhetoric. Give us numbers to back up your assertions. Do your homework, we are not just accepting what people say anymore. And don’t tell me “It is obvious.” When someone says that it is a good reason to doubt what they are saying.

  9. Gershom Romain
    April 25, 2012

    Magnificent Article. Props Dr. Emanuel, it was a joy to read and filled with valuable information. Please spread the word.

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