DEAR BELLA: I may have to let my true love go…what’s your advice?

Dear Bella,

I recently saw you posted a situation from another couple and their relationship with two outside lovers. I am going through the same thing right now. Me and my girlfriend been together for almost 8 years, We been on and off for months whenever we fight, but due to the fact that we love each other, we always tend to get back together after arguments and harsh words. I travelled a lot and it seems like she kept faithful even if I heard stories with different guys.

Bella, I did things with other women when we was on separation break. Things I cannot change and things she will always remember. Bella, I don’t want this because I want her. Bella, I feel incomplete without her because I can’t see or feel the same elsewhere. I always tend to push away other females who fall in love with me so I can go back to her. Our longest break up is about 3-4 months.

We would speak on and off and I would ask her to move on cause I was stressed, depressed from not having her. I was going through life, financial, work and other issues but now I am back on perfect track with my life. I am good Bella.

We recently started talking a week ago and she told me that she meet someone she been seeing for about a month. I never been so HURT before. She claims that she is not happy and we both wants each other back. We came to a conclusion and started working on our relationship. Bella we speak like we never broke up with all the ‘I love you’s’ in the world. 

She promised to end her new relationship to come back to me. It’s been 5 days and she hasn’t show any evidence of or done anything. She keep saying they haven’t spoken since, which I can’t trust. (What kind of guy loves you but won’t check up on you). I been waiting for 5 days Bella to see if she is doing what she promised.

I think it’s toxic because I don’t want another man claiming the girl I love. So, I agreed to give her that chance. Sketchy situation which makes no sense to me; that’s what I’m writing you for your advice.

I will make her happy but I will move on if I have to because we all deserve to be happy in life. 

Best regards

 


 

Dear Uncertain,

There’s an old saying: if you love something, let it go and if it comes back to you, then it was always yours but if it doesn’t come back, it was never yours.

In your case, it seems as if the survival of your relationship depends on whether you two are meant for each other.
You made bad decisions and that obviously has implications.
People find their way back to each other when they love each other. Love endures all things and if this is love then it will survive.
I think you should leave her alone and see what happens.
Best,
Bella

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5 Comments

  1. Cherry Blossom..
    January 25, 2020

    Just move on…

  2. Not An Echo Chamber
    July 29, 2019

    Could Bella be a Fella seeking stir the DNO pot?

  3. Blank
    July 28, 2019

    Ya’ll toxic to eachother. I’m exhausted, feeling to break up just reading this and I’m single.
    Parasite relationship

  4. Bwa-Banday
    July 27, 2019

    Partner you are suffering from a serious GWO-PWELL and just being used. The woman have you and him so she smiling all the way to church for holy communion. Nothing wrong with her being in control and enjoying dessert and lunch. Either you stay there and take your blows or you walk. Stop all that Nancy story stuff because she already figured you out. Bella can help you bro. Don’t hate the player, hate the game :mrgreen:

  5. July 27, 2019

    Sometimes a person is holding on to something, that cannot be fixed, and may be blocking themselves from something better. As the song says Just Kiss and Say Goodbye.

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