I am acting just like a prostitute

Dear BellaMany write letters to you and your readers consider them to be fake, but I am a real Dominican girl boldly speaking the truth behind the screen of a PC.

I am an 18-year-old. I live with my mom and dad. I’ve been sexually active from age eleven although my mom and dad is very strict with me. I have had unprotected sexual contact with over 20 men and I also kissed about over 30 men.

With the men I have had sexual contact with, sometimes it is a one-night stand and sometimes I like the person because they’re cute. I have sexual contact with the most impossible people, even a political leader of Dominica.

I’ll not call names and I am not in it for money but just for the pleasure of it and I am acting just like a prostitute. I AM ADDICTED and I need help to stop.

Daily I look at porn and I’m even thinking of becoming a lesbian. I look real innocent and I am known by many in Dominica. Sometimes I also feel to just have a man and settle down as long as he treats me nice in every way.

I am really confused and sometimes feel suicidal because of the way my life is. I must sex to have fun and sometimes I have three men for the day.

I really need to change but there are other issues in my life. I am very lucky I haven’t gotten any sexual disease as yet.

Please, please, I need some advice.

Desperate

Dear Desperate,

I am sad and shocked at the situation you are in. You need to stop this dangerous practice immediately as you are exposing yourself to many illnesses including the deadly HIV virus. This type of behavior will get you nowhere in  the future and I hope you realize that.

Now you mentioned that there are other issues in your life, and I suspect they are the roots of your behavior. I encourage you to explore these issues and resolve them as soon as possible.

In the meantime go get yourself a test and concentrate on something fruitful.

Bella

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151 Comments

  1. Mieno
    June 30, 2019

    People dont become lesbians they just are. You wanting to be a lesbian and pretending to be into women also won’t make your sexual addiction go away. I think you’re really strong for admitting this you should try seeking a professional so that they can help you in a way that we cant (the people of the internet)

  2. jesus we need mercy
    May 8, 2013

    john 8:7
    anyone who has no sin in their life should step forward and throw the first stone.
    none of you all are without sin,yes she is strugglin with this problem but we all have our own faults dont throw stone if u living in glass house,let God judge her,
    my girl jesus loves you no matter what uve done he loves you,give him your heart and he will surely set you free!

  3. January 22, 2013

    Dear Desperate: You were wise enough to realize you have a problem and strong enough to reach out for help. Your letter was posted a year ago. A lot has probably happened since then. I am offering a few comments hoping that something I say will still help you and maybe help others. Very early in life (11 yrs) you were taken advantage of and sexually abused by an older man. You were a child and under the age of consent. The man was a pedophile (somebody who sexually asaults children). He was a criminal. This abuse was not your fault but it put you on the wrong road. You are responsible for the bad things you have done since then. Accepting that responsibility is a move in the right direction. You can change. In fact you can become – not only O.K. – you can become a good and very worth while person. Here are a few things I’d like you to think about. (1) All the sexual experiences you have had – unprotected sex with over 20 men (and how many others?) – have not satisfied you. Obviously, you are on the wrong road. (2) You are far enough down that road to see where it leads because you have thought of suicide. Not where you want to go!(3) If you don’t want to speed up the engine take your foot off the gas. You shouldn’t look at porn any time. But looking at it every day if you are trying to break free from sexual addiction is like putting the gas petal to the metal if you are trying to stop your car! (4) The fact that you are “thinking of becoming a lesbian” once again shows that people are not born homosexuals even though for some the feelings begin very young. Others are edged into homosexuality later in life because of sexual abuse or because they open their minds and hearts to the influence of unclean evil spirits by sinful behaviour. It is not the way to go! I can assure you of this. If you crossed over into a homosexual lifestyle you would go in the same body you’re in now. You would take your sexual addiction with you. Generally speaking – and there are exceptions – homosexuals have more sexual partners, and more frustration, than straight people. Studies show they have a higher rate of alcoholism, drug addiction, AIDS, and suicide. They also have a shorter lifespan. (5) I want to help you get off the road you are on now and onto a new path – one that leads in a different direction. Please notice I said “help”. All I or nybody else can do is help. Desperate, you are the one who must decide you have had enough of the old life and stop doing the wrong things. The only way to stop is stop! Put away from you and put out of your life any and all literature, tapes, CDs, DVDs, shows, or websites, that would cause you to be tempted to do wrong. Stay away from – and out of – every place where evil is lurking and sin waits to pull you down! Begin to attend the services at a Bible believing evangelical church. It will take time but I promise if you do this you will meet new friends who will be able to help you grow in this new life. Personally, I recommend a Pentecostal church. I invite you to visit my website http://www.livinghopeministries.ca In the right margin click onto EAGLE COURSE. This 12 Lesson Workbook Manual is all you need to help you find deliverance and freedom! It can be studied from the screen or copied absolutely free. LESSON ONE will explain God’s plan of salvation and tell you how to receive Jesus Christ as your Personal Saviour. Please do it! The moment you do a new life will begin. This does not mean all your problems will instantly disappear. There will be things to work out. But it means Christ – that’s right, Christ Himself – will be on the inside. You will never be along again! He will be there to fight your battles. He will begin a process of healing from the inside out. This is not about religion. It’s about a relationship with the Lord! Sincerely, Rev. Donald Hill. Pentecostal Evangelist.

    • Mieno
      June 30, 2019

      She cant become a lesbian no matter how much homosexual sex she has. You’re born straight you’re not made straight. People are born lesbian.

  4. sainseeee
    March 21, 2012

    lmfaoooo allu can get vex wi .she knw what she doing wrong u grinding a set of big man and have your self like a slut because u want to smh the way u act is so immature and childish and u talk all that shit about man accepting you what man would take a woman dat dont respect her self seriously smh honeslty i aint gonna tell you stop cause you know its stupid smh. until you learn how to love yours self and stop making sex do it for you … if you wanan feel loved smoke dope instead

    • Jada
      June 30, 2019

      She has an addiction. Do you know what that means. It’s like drinking rum all the time and knowing the alcohol bad for your system but still doing it because your brain likes how it feels when you do these acts. Its an addiction.

  5. delores
    March 10, 2012

    Now you mentioned that there are other issues in your life, and I suspect they are the roots of your behavior. I encourage you to explore these issues and resolve them as soon as possible.

    In the meantime go get yourself a test and concentrate on something fruitful.
    SERIOUSLY BELLA??????? what do yo mean by exploring these issues, its more than apparant the young woman seriously needs proffessional help. thats not something she can just resolve on her own or just forget about it………..gosh, bella

  6. datt u hear wi
    March 6, 2012

    is dat the only advice u givin the girl???? tell the girl go n see a councellor or sum

  7. hmmmmmm
    March 4, 2012

    dominican are always quick to judge, :-x the young lady is asking for help not for all those hard critics. some people always quick to judge but behind close doors there life is a million times worse. we never know how peolpe feel and why they do they things they do, when ever someone need help if you dont have anything good to say then shut up..my girl turn to the lord in prayer and ask for help no problem is to big for him to solve.I am sure its an addiction poblem

  8. Anonymous
    March 1, 2012

    fIRST MY DEAR YOU NEED COUNSELLING SPEAK TO A PASTOR OR SOCIAL WORKER YOU NEED TO GET TO THE ROOT OF THE PROBLEM AND BY THE GRACE OF GOD YOU WILL OVERCOME . yOU CAN ALSO SIT DOWN AND WRITE DOWN WHAT YOU FEEL. T

  9. sexual healing
    February 21, 2012

    Girl you might be surprised how many people like youself there is out there. While you all saying pray about it the root of the problem is what you need to find to actually root it out of your life.
    I know someone who started acting just like you when her brother died because she could not deal with the memories of him molesting her.were you abused? Raped? Is sex a pacifier for failures or self esteem boosts. DA small counselors talk write about how you feel when you get the urge for sex…pray when the feelings come and avoid situations that put you in the way of sex. If you must have sex then start pleasuring yourself see if that helps.

  10. Sexaddict
    February 17, 2012

    Who is this Bella? Why is it that she can’t give proper advice when needed? The young lady stated that she has a problem and needs help, yet nowhere has Bella pointed the young lady to the way. Sweetheart, if you are looking for help, I suggest that you speak to a Pastor (NOT male) or a counsellor who can guide you. Sex addiction is no joke and worse than getting an STD is living a life feeling worthless about yourself.

  11. sookooyat
    February 16, 2012

    ALASSSSSSSSSSSSS :cry: :cry: stop that !! woiiii

  12. NatureBoy
    February 13, 2012

    Miss, since you wrote for advice, and you knew that you would get alot of that from bloggers concerned about you, it would be nice for us to hear your response to at least some of the positive advice you received. I would certainly like to know how you feel about the scriptural thoughts and encouragement I offered.

    • yes Lord
      February 14, 2012

      i believe this young lady was exposed to sexual demons and definitely needs deliverance before she get more controlled and kill her self, trust God he gave you sexual feelings and he can control them wait you will get the husband you desire. sweetheart be very careful. God can take care of any problem if you open up for him to take over

      • April 9, 2013

        Yes Lord: We hear very little said about demons today from modern pulpits. Sin comes from our own fallen nature – the Adam nature – within us. The first time we commit any particular sin it is the result of temptation and an act of our own will. But what many people don’t understand is that when we deliberately and repeatedly commit certain sins we are attracting demons to ourselves like flies are attracted to rotting flesh. These demons watch for an opportunity to enter the human being to possess and take control of the person. There are some practices that open the door to possession such as deliberate and repeated disobedience to God, dabbling in the occult, pornography, alcohol and drug abuse, etc. Once a demon has become entrenched in the human soul the individual may have various symptoms depending on what kind of spirit it is. No amount of medication, counseling, therapy, or treatment is going to help until the individual repents of the sin that attracted or drew the demon to him (or her) in the first place. It is a sin problem as must be addressed as such. Sometimes it is enough for the person to get saved (born again) by believing in Christ and receiving Him. The following scriptures apply, Romans 3:10,23. 1 Corinthians 15:3,4. St. John 1:11,12. Revelation 3:20. There are cases when it is necessary to literally have the evil spirit cast out in the nam of Jesus Christ according to Mark 16:17, Acts 16:16-18. This is more than a ritual. It is a Biblical act of faith and must be taken very seriously or there can be terrible consequnces. Read Acts 19:13-16. The person seeking deliverance must confess his (or her) sins to God and renounce any misconduct that has been responsible for attracting the demons. As I have said before, not everybody who claims to have a “deliverance ministry” is the real deal”. No field of ministry has more pretenders. You only need to look back at Acts 19:13-16 to find an example of this kind of fraud. Avoid any freelancer who is not associated with a recognized congregaton of believers and does not answer to a higher authority. If the victim wants to stay free it is important to develop a strong devotional life of daily Bible reading and prayer. He (or she) should also become part of a solid evangelical church and hear the Word of God preached and taught on a weekly basis. I am praying for a fresh emphasis on the message of salvation and a return to a scriptural deliverance ministry in all evangelical churches. It should not be unusual to hear demons crying with loud voices coming out of those who are possessed in our services. Without THIS kind of revival satan is going to continue to invade our communities. Sincerely, Rev. Donald Hill. Pentecostal Evangelist.

  13. james borne
    February 11, 2012

    how do we know this person is not playing us? sounds like a joke.am just saying.

  14. nubian
    February 11, 2012

    dear girl, everyone goes thru some rough patch in their life… seek christ, pray well and stop being so damn underneath. u act like a saint infront of your parents and like a real standpipe out side.. find a “mojo”… i had a serious anger issue. i would get nose bleeds when i pull a fit. and i found my place… when i get mad i organize stuff and do nails.. i paint/polish… so when u get these urges find something to do.. u are putting yourself at a high risk for cervical cancer. i wish u the best

  15. Hmmm
    February 10, 2012

    Cassandra I don’t believe you actually go on bella for advice, I told u what to do already and you’re still seeking advice. I will come Salisbury and check u later…smh

    • Pamputae
      February 15, 2012

      Awa wii…U didnt have to put d person name and address…Pure sabotage…Smfh

      • Shahvaise
        February 29, 2012

        I have no doubt that the person under the identity Hmmmm; does not know the individual, farless name or the address. For some reason, the person is trying to divert attention. It sounds like the behaviour of the bugging man. Pure sabotage.

    • Seriously
      April 23, 2012

      But DNO comment moderator is a joke? What for you to delete you publishing, what for you to publish you deleting. USE YOUR HEAD DO YOUR WORK PROPERLY. You probably laugh when u see that comment stupes you too WICKED

  16. Truth
    February 10, 2012

    Some people are Soldiers, some are Nuns, others are Scientists and some are Salop. Just as you sleep with 3 men in 1 day you will eventually start sleeping with women and I’m sure more than 1 man at a time. All the behavior you described is selfish behavior; the root of the problem with all women that behave like you is THEY WANT ATTENTION! and will do anything to get it, some men know this and play them like instruments. Even if you found a great guy you would still do what you’re doing because it’s not relationship or love you seek from others the fact is you don’t love yourself! Since sex is the easiest thing a woman can get with reward and no major effort, you gravitate towards that. You just haven’t found other more productive ways to get attention or to feel validated. Try helping someone, learning something new, volunteering etc. it will give you a sense of self-worth that will hopefully overcome the emptiness you’re trying to fill. All the tole and words in the world will not fix you, you have to love YOU first.

  17. DD
    February 9, 2012

    you may as well use it like a private atm…#### goes in money comes out. lmao

  18. gosh
    February 9, 2012

    DNO what qualifies BELLA for such a position. Does the responder have any training in this field. As a trained therapist i am utterly disgusted by the responses to these situations and often wonder what if these cases are genuine, whether you really think that you are being of any assistance to these people. So if this is show, fine entertain the masses but if this is real, then be honest with yourself and these people and find someone who is qualified and experienced to respond on these matters. for a matter of fact i do believe that their are lots of people who can identify with these stories whether they a fictitous or not, so i appeal to your conscience, moral judgement and ethical principles to reconsider your aproach for this section of your website.

    • NatureBoy
      February 9, 2012

      Excellent points. I thought so as well, that even if some may be made-up stories, there definitely are many persons who pretty much match the lifestyles described, and who may well be helped by a professional, ethical, conscientious, balanced and spiritually-minded ‘Bella’.

    • Totally Agree
      February 18, 2012

      I completely agree with your statement, Gosh. Bella’s response was vague, thin, and just plain useless. Even if this isn’t someone real, there are indeed young people going through the same things who could benefit from tangible advice. If this person is real, she has disclosed that she was a victim of child sexual abuse, that she is most likely suffering from PTSD (many victims do), has become promiscuous as a result, is depressed, feels hopeless, and contemplating suicide, and the advice to her is “be fruitful?” What the heck does that mean? Stupes. I urge the writer to seek professional advice asap. There must be people in DA who could help her.

  19. Anonymous
    February 9, 2012

    How can you say that you have never gotten any sexual diseases .Young lady, get yourself tested and stop that none-sense

    • Sandy
      February 13, 2012

      Dominica is a democratic country and people cannot speak their minds….well Anonymous her own infront, yours behind….we all have problems, we handle it/them differently, let the young lady seek her advice, if you don’t like it do not respond…. you seem to always have answers for every thing on DNO. She has a problem, and it was not addressed to you, so please keep your negative advice to yourself.

  20. Al
    February 8, 2012

    they need to get rid of bella…. these kind of letters do not need to be posted for people to read and respond to… Pure nonsense.

    • Sandy
      February 13, 2012

      Becareful what you ask for you just might get it…..what you wish for someone else might just happen to you. Grow up. Stop acting like a child.

      • haha
        April 23, 2012

        wooyyyy look joke u dat is bella? u sound a bit defensive

  21. forreal
    February 8, 2012

    hey young lady,let me give a little secret, by recognizing your state of mind and behavour,you have already broken it,you know now,you don’t need intervention,you have already given yourself a chance to adjust,just adjust,get involve in other learning activities,that is all,wow you amaze me,you are stronger than you think,you actaully wrote to bella,you are not dumb,what you are now doing is thinking out loud,the god within you is priking you,just dont kick against the prick,just live normal,and tell yourself just that,and you will be alright,what i am saying to you is exactly what a learned psychologist would tell you.

  22. GY
    February 8, 2012

    that girl is just a RAT :mrgreen:

  23. EliYah
    February 8, 2012

    Young lady…if you started having sex at 11, then you would not have learnt to associate pleasure with love–that is the root of your problem right now. Also it is not your fault—because you have no legal power to give consent to sexual activity at that age. At age 11, anyone who draws you into any sexual activity (especially if an adult) has committed an indictable offence). IT is a Good Thing that you recognize this as a problem though..because it is…however, reaching out via this forum is not a bad idea in itself as it presents the possibility that someone who can truly help may read your plea but also expect a lot of negative, unlearned and generally foolish comments.

    So how can you fix it…?
    Pleasure has a drug-like effect and this is what you are experiencing. Your mind has associated it with a sense of well being so it produces strong urges for you to pursue it. This is difficult to fix on your own. It is obvious that the men you sleep with like you the way you are…(they are not driven by love for you—but by love for sex).

    Also…finding a truly honest counsellor is not an easy thing…and Dominica has quite a few beffy and heartless people who would rather ridicule or exploit your vulnerability rather that help you recover.

    First, do you believe in the almighty? Yahweh is his name. Let me share a secret with you…we cannot control the paths we walk, we only have the power of choice. after we have chosen, another power takes over…it is either the power of Yahweh…if you choose good things, or the power of Satan…if you choose things that are not good.

    From your post I see that now you have grown up, you are beginning to try to make a different choice rather than continue in that way you were drawn into.

    I wish to advise you to pray to Yahweh, our heavenly father. Ask him to deliver you from your problem. Ask him to send someone to help you in the name of Yahshua his son. It is a very important first step, my friend. Now that you have nowhere solid to turn to, this is a perfect turn. He will send you someone.

    Usually, a female friend may be of more help in this situation than a male as men are more likely to get turned on by your revelations of “an insatiable desire for sex” than would a woman. There are a few honest and trust worthy men but they are not easy to find. I know of an Elder of Qahal Yahweh and his wife “Foster Joseph, and his wife Alma Joseph” who recently celebrated 50 years of marriage. Their number is 448 8567. They could give you some great advice without compromising your integrity.

    Don’t try to make the change in your life for yourself, you most likely will fail. Make it for Yahweh. Let you decision be because you know he will be happy with it. Tell him you want to reserve the rest of your years of sexual pleasure for the man that he will send you. It will work my friend. Try it….

    Also if you wish to continue receive advice anonymously without ever revealing your identity, it would also be good. Create a new email address with a fake nickname. send me an email at:

    qahalyahweh@hotmail.com

    I will not ask you for your name or any other personal information…it is really not important and has nothing to do with the problem. We will chat and discuss the issues and I am sure Yahweh will guide us to a solution that will restore you to a safe path through his son Yahshua of Nazareth.

    Whatever your decision I pray you find my advice helpful and that Yahweh makes a way for you out of this trouble you have found yourself in. By the way, my friend, suicide is really not a way out of trouble, it is a way deeper in…for one day all flesh will rise to answer for their decisions, whether they be good or evil. To find the way out, you must be alive. Stay alive my friend, we can find a way out for you together…with Yahweh’s help.

    Your new Friend in Yahshua.

  24. GB girl
    February 8, 2012

    Bella you can’t you be more specific and give more details rather than just this?..She came to seek advice from you..Help her nah..lol.
    Awa boi woman crazy dem days dere wii..I aint kno what causing this to them young women..I wonder if is too much hormones from the chicken they consuming.SMFH.Sad!!!

  25. GB girl
    February 8, 2012

    Bella can’t you be more specific and give more details rather than just this?..She came to seek advice from you..Help her nah..lol.
    Awa boi woman crazy dem days dere wii..I aint kno what causing this to them young women..I wonder if is too much hormones from the chicken they consuming.SMFH.Sad!!!

  26. GB girl
    February 8, 2012

    Bella you can’t you be more specific and give more details rather than just this?..She came to seek advice from you..Help her nah..lol.
    Awa boi woman crazy dem days dere wii..I aint kno what causing this to them young women..I wonder if is too much hormones from the chicken they consuming.SMFH.Sad!!!

  27. Anonymous
    February 8, 2012

    girl i would’nt want you even if they put you on a plate with peas and rice,i mean where were your parents at the age of eleven?i grew 4 daughters and it was my responsibilities to know where they were,what they were doing and who they were with.So where were your parents?
    And are you not smart enough to know that at this time of your life you should be focusing on better things than trying to satisfy whats between your legs?
    After sex you only have three things,a wet cat,a dead rooster and two tired asses.So learn this you will die but it will never be satisfied no matter how many men or women u get.

    • stupess
      March 3, 2012

      u talking as if ur kids wud never lie to u.. they can tell u they one place and be another… don’t judge pple.. everyone has a bad past im sure ures aint that good

    • sandy
      March 4, 2012

      You are an adu8lt and you claim to have raised 4 daughters, I pray that they never did that this young lady is doing.
      She is seeking advice, if you cannot give her the positive she needs, please keep your negative comments to yourself. I wonder if it were one if our daughters what would you have said.
      ‘hen your neighbor’s housee is on fire, wet yours.’
      The way you comment is as though you are turned on by her ordeal….”After sex you only have threethings, a wet cat, a dead rooster and two tired asses” it seem like yiu have done this to many young girls, so you would know exactly how wet dead and tired it would be. GROW UP!!!!!! STOP ACTING LIKE A FOOL.. A simple comment on D N O have you acting like a maniac. May God have mercy on us all, May He touch the heart of this young lady, and heal her from this sickness, so she can have a normal life, and be proud of who she is. God forgives us everytime we ask for forgiveness, why can’t we forgive another person, when they need to be forgiven. Remember what the Lord’s prayer says…. FORGIVE US OUR TRESPASSES, AS WE FORGIVE THOSE WHO TRESPASS AGAINST US…..

    • well...Agape
      May 5, 2012

      Anonymous,you are so self-righteous my head aches at your stupidity. As you stated you grew three daughters,people raise children they do not grow them and you will be shocked if you found out the things your perfect daughters did.Hypocrite.

  28. February 8, 2012

    TO MANY OF US THINK THAT IF SOMEONE GOES TO BED WITH 100 MEN OR WOMEN THEY MIGHT BE THE ONES THAT WILL GET THE AIDS VIRUS.STOP FOOLING OURSELVES.IT IS TRUE IF YOU DO NOT GET IT FROM ONE PERSON YOU MIGHT GET IT FROM ANOTHER.IT TAKES ONE TIME WITH ONE PERSON TO GET AIDS…THAT IS WHY SOME OF US TAKE RISKS ALL THE TIME BECAUSE WE HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX WITH ONE PERSON…CERTAIN WE ARE MORE EXPOSED TO IT WITH MANY PARTNERS BUT IT TAKES ONLY ONCE WITH ONE PERSON TO GET IT…CAREFULL

  29. Giovanni Scapellie
    February 8, 2012

    aye i think i can help you i know several people who where like you and i have helped them get over stuff like that all you do is link me and if you are serious i will work with you to get over your sex driven fun seeking ok 8)

    • Ah ha!
      February 8, 2012

      Dude I know who you are…and you are in noposition to help this girl… Shame on you for seeing opportunity at someone else’s cry for help!

      And when I meet you I will tell u to your face!

    • awa
      February 9, 2012

      lol…you can help?…little girls he like not his fault

  30. MIND OF MY OWN
    February 8, 2012

    Sex addiction is real. You need professional help, NOT BELLA! Go get it at the correct place.

  31. (DSI)
    February 8, 2012

    Woman when ur little carcarlack scraching u take a bath. But u say u watching porn daily well use ur hand . And live de man if u so confused . When I was ur age I had no I dere about sex and 26 year and it looks like u had more expirence than me . Give it a break my girl . And bella bella ok .

  32. Mac
    February 8, 2012

    You said you need help, i can give you some help i will be coming to DA soon, what your address? You are not acting like a prostitute if you giving it away ike that, you should be selling it 2o men at $50 each is a good little earner, even $25 would make you some good carn, and I will tell you god give you women a checque book use it, dont be ashame iam an daaict too,and i have a sex problem i cant get enought. sell it dont give it away.

  33. Concerned
    February 8, 2012

    This is clearly a fake letter. You can tell that is was not written by an 18 year old in that crisis. The language alone tells you it is fake; a made up case by the writer.

  34. NatureBoy
    February 8, 2012

    Hi Desperate, It’s very commendable that you acknowledge a very serious and dangerous problem because that’s a first key to overcoming it. You’re by no means the only one with such a problem, and many who formerly had such a problem have been helped to overcome it, and so can you. So please consider the following carefully, and look up the scripture texts in your Bible:

    First, the Bible acknowledges that sin can be ‘enjoyable’, that’s why it attracts us.- Heb.
    11:25 shows that at best, that fun will only be ‘temporary’. So look down the road.

    Pornography can also be a seemingly enjoyable, strong addiction, but it fuels immorality, an unclean view of sexual intimacy and of the opposite sex(making them seem to be mere objects to gratify our sexual desires),thus it violates Bible principles and must be avoided at all cost. – Psalm 119:37 – “Make my eyes pass on from seeing what is worthless.”. Col. 3:5-“Deaden your body members as respects fornication..”

    A diligent study of the Bible will help you to build the very best, the strongest, motivation to break off from a bad lifestyle – deep love for God and Christ and thus a heartfelt desire to avoid hurting them by wrong conduct. eg. John 14:15,23,24 – “If you love me, you will observe my commandments…and my Father will love you..”. and 1John5:3 – “This is what the love of God means, that we observe his commandments, and yet his commandments are not burdensome.”

    A regular Bible study in addition to your personal Bible reading and prayer, will help you develop such love that is far stronger than the love for ‘temporary enjoyment of sin.’ That’s what has helped many to overcome weaknesses.

    If you accept help to study the Bible and you diligently try to apply what you learn, even though changes may not come overnight, you will soon fit the description at 1 Cor. 6:9-11 – after listing vices of those who will perish if unrepentant, Paul tells the Christians: “And yet that is what some of you WERE, but you have been WASHED CLEAN…”.

    Please, Desperate- do what many overcomers have done – seek and accept help through a Bible study with Jehovah’s Witnesses. You can meet them on the streets or at one of their meeting places they call KINGDOM HALLS. They’re skilled at using the Bible to help honest ones like yourself. You will no longer be desperate if you do that.

  35. February 7, 2012

    Desperate

    Greetings to you my young lady, in the name of Jesus Christ.

    I will first ask you this question: Do you believe in God Almighty, who is Love– and Jesus Christ, His only begotten Son–who is God’s Person Love?

    If your answer is yes, you have friend in me. I live in Toronto Canada right now, but I love our Dominica, and I intend to return home within the next few years–God’s Will be done.

    I am nuch older than you in years–but I know how to fit to your sentiments of youth, to give you the comfort and Love that you need right now, for I was a youth as well, once upon a time.

    I am inviting you to talk to me–for I know that is what you need to do. Don’t say you do not know me. I am not a stranger on DNO; many commentators will recognize me by my identity. I am a very friendly person.

    I love Jesus and I know that He loves you. He will work through me for your sake, but it is your choice, as always!

    My email address is elizabethxvier9@gmail.com By the guidance of God’s Holy Spirit, we can fight and conquer that difficult situation, which you are in right now, as we use the waapon of faith along with the words of God’s Love. But you must make the first step. We can talk to each other two or three times a day.

    In the meantime, hear Jesus’ voice saying to you: “Come to Me, you who labour and is carrying a heavy load: I will give you rest”!

    I am willing to put you on that path where you will find Jesus and the Living rest that He is offering to you. Let us become friends. Blessings of peace and joy!

  36. hmmm
    February 7, 2012

    hi desperate am a young lady also an d i know in these life has many temptations however you need to be strong and make up your mind to better your life..your only hurting yourself by doing these acts think of the many diseases out there also unwanted pregnancy my advice to you is to;
    1. seek the lord in prayer and ask him for guidance in your life
    2.seek counselling from some one trust worthy educated and mature preferably a priest or professional help or a grown mature individual
    3.confess your sins to god or confess to a priest have some one pray for you
    4.seek biblical advice
    5.get to the root of your personal issues in life and and try to over come them
    desperate it might not be easy but nothing worth-it comes easy without working hard OK ill pray for you also …

  37. Envar
    February 7, 2012

    Girl you are the best, i hope you feel lighter now.. I know women that a worst than you but it is good you can come out and say all these things…..

    My advise to you is to go to a priest do not trust none of them that offering you help all they want is their share.

    You are not a mental case, you just need to give your life to christ do not take people personal number let them give you their office number instead.

    See how people misinterpret, , there have been many political leaders over the past few years.

    I am a trained , and if i offer you therapy you will hate sex, you are supposed to love sex, you should just be able to control your urges and minimize you sexual partners.

    Just take care of your self…. keep sweet

  38. Roseau
    February 7, 2012

    Aye check me nuh…. <..>

  39. Justice and Truth
    February 7, 2012

    She has been sexually active since the age of eleven? You surely started early. This could lead to prostitution, pain and sorrow.
    I heard and read that it takes approximately ten years for HIV to develop in people. Bella is correct. Get a test. Waste no time about that. However, it may be like cancer. If per chance you contracted it, it may not be detected early.
    Let us not make any excuses for her and water-down the truth. As much as God is compassionate and forgiving, He makes no excuses for sin. Do not insult her but offer concrete advice.
    Where were your parents when you were conducting yourself in an un-childlike situation? Did you complete primary and high school? This is what you should have been concentrating on as a young child; by no means sex. I do hope a boy/man did not sexually abuse you. This could be a cause for your present situation.
    So you have become addicted to sex. The fact that you have thought of suicide, I understand that you will feel that way. Sex and with all those partners, at your age, do not heal the void in your heart. It is only temporary. The devil has taken over your entire body and soul and he will prompt you to be suicidal and to commit suicide. DO NOT ALLOW THE EVIL ONE THIS EVIL PRIVILEGE. He is up to no good. Life is worth living and you can change with effort, patience and time.
    You need to seek a trusted counselor or a psychiatrist, a genuine mentor who could offer concrete advice on how to overcome this type of feeling.
    Most of all you need to seek Our Lord Jesus Christ in worship and prayer. He is the Healer of what is ailing you and what has overtaken you.
    You cannot heal yourself and I wonder if any human being, no matter how professional, well-learned and experienced can heal you.
    After all is said and done only God can put a hand in your life and change your life. Turn to God, speak to Him and listen to Him in your heart as the Holy Spirit will speak to you.
    God loves you and wants every one to be happy and peaceful in life. You are lacking these godly traits and to resist sexual temptation.
    Attend a Healing Mass or other Service. Join a group of prayer warriors and attend prayerful gatherings. They will assist you with the help of God. Never give up.
    The old saying, “If at first you do not succeed, try again.” God wants you to keep trying to change your life. You have many years ahead of you. Make the most of your time. Keep fruitfully busy; not indulging in this type of behaviour.
    You will obviously, have to give up your present life and stay away from those men.
    Pertaining considering being a lesbian, do not keep entertaining that thought. This is a road which will also lead to nowhere, no happiness and peace of heart and mind. Call it a cul-de-sac.
    God created you a woman. As St. Paul said: “Remain in the status that God created you”, a woman. Do not try to change it. Furthermore, it is displeasing to God.
    Every one deserves a second chance. Our God is a God of many chances. I hope someday you will meet a good and worthy man, settle down and have children and nurture them appropriately. This is what God wants for you. May God assist you. May He bless you! I know He will.

    • fatouche
      February 8, 2012

      clearly you have mis-read your info; it takes 10 years for HIV to develop into AIDS. after having unprotected sex with a random partner be it deliberate or accidental an HIV test should be taken ASAP and another should be taken 6 months here after as during the 6 month ‘window period’ the virus, though present in the body is not detectable

  40. Ebony
    February 7, 2012

    Clearly your coming to the wrong place for advice! Seek professional help, your in a good position right now b\c you’ve realized your faults.

  41. Humanist
    February 7, 2012

    …going to the trouble of claiming your letter is not fake only adds to the suspicion that it is. This may be real, but it could just as easily be a fake specifically designed to stir up Dominicans by having mentioned a number of hot-button issues: political leaders (wisely unnamed), homosexuality, prostitution, etc. It is rather odd, too, that she seems to be keeping track of the number of men she has been with.

    Unless the person who posted this can provide some kind of proof, this should be treated as a deliberate fake.

    • Justice and Truth
      February 7, 2012

      @ Humanist

      Fake or not, let us give the benefit of the doubt. The comments are to assist her if the story is genuine. If not, it should assist other young girls, boys and adults.
      If she has a good memory, she should know approximately how many men she went with. For a young woman or a woman for that matter, these are a lot of men. Did you not read that she sometimes has sex three times a day? This is being addicted. She is fortunate if she has not yet contracted HIV.

    • Anonymous
      February 8, 2012

      Are over and about definite words? Or were they used to portray proximity? Because I read the article and these are the words that were used. I am a young woman and if you are not able to give an approximate figure of your sexual partners then something is definitely wrong.
      Also, why bother comment on the article if you believe it to be fake? Seems like a waste of your time.

    • fatouche
      February 8, 2012

      comeon now, dont be a hypocrit. im sure you can remember the name of all the people you slept with and who was nice, who was yuck and who was the best. so she simply recounted the names and counted……..

  42. Pebbles
    February 7, 2012

    Dear desperate, you should be proud of yourself for coming foward and acknowledging you need help. First may I suggest you seek help from a sex therapist or addiction counsellor to address what’s in your past that triggered that behavior. Second talk to your parents and ask for their forgiveness they might be a lot more supporting than you think. Next join a pray group and seek Christ You will feel relieve and uplifted. Last stop the behavior when you are tempted to watch porn or have sex do something for your mind go for a walk, read a book or something that will engage your mind. You are worth much more than that and committing suicide or exposing yourself to diseases is certainly not what God created you for. Find your passion in life and seek it with the help of God. Good luck please keep us posted we are rooting for you.

  43. Sweetpea
    February 7, 2012

    Hope u read all the wonderful advice that you have been given here. seems like u want to dissociate yourself from the person that you are (i can tell by the way you wrote to bella) seemed like someone else was writing this about you. you don’t want to be that person because you kno shes harmful. you have been given enough good advise here so i dont really need to give u anymore…i know that in your heart u kno that u can do better…

  44. Francis Chicago
    February 7, 2012

    Miss acting like a prostitute,,.Well you need to do this on your own get to a local church and talk to the pastor you need deliverance let him pray for you.But its up to you to seek God one and one you need 21 days of fasting and praying on your own and keep this two legs close.Use that authority today and attacck every power of darkness,confusion,despair and offense that battles yoursoul.I give unto you power to tread on serpents and scorpions and over all the power of the enemy and northing shall by any means hurt you”.[Luke 10;19].

  45. we go see
    February 7, 2012

    My Bible tells me “for the wages of sin is death but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ” give your life to Jesus Christ he will give you peace that passeth all understanding and he’ll make you whole .
    You are just who Christ is looking, he needs you and he loves you abundantly.

    • January 23, 2013

      Dear We go see: I read BELLA’S column because it seems to be a meeting place for troubled people. I am a preacher so sometimes I offer a few thoughts of my own. Reading many of the comments is like swimming through sewage. Thank you for your comments! In a few words you shared Christ! He is still the Great Physician of sick souls! Lift Jesus higher, lift Jesus higher. Lift Him up for the world to see. For He said, “If I be lifted up from the earth, I’ll draw all men unto me.” Sincerely, Rev. Donald Hill. Pentecostal Evangelist.

  46. HELP
    February 7, 2012

    hi i have dealt with this kind of problem before in the United states.I COULD HELP IF U WANT CONTACT ME ON 245-3267 IMMEDIATELY

  47. honest
    February 7, 2012

    Hi desperate I reaaly hope that you read this. Although you may not believe or even understand it but Jesus truly cares about everything that concerns you. ALso there is nothing that is impossible for God to do. If you really want to stop get on your knees and make a genuine plea to God and he can and will help you. There is nothing impossible for him to do. Try him and ypu will experience his power.

  48. February 7, 2012

    First of all, loving, it is good that you see your self as having big problems, indeed i think you are. you have just made a first step to your solusion. you have a huge adiction problem and you need to get all the help that you can get. please see a church pastor, counceler, or a friend that you can trust, but please talk to someone. i wish you all the best and god’s blessing, there is alot in life for you. you are young and sure are beautyful.
    I love you and God bless you.
    blessings.

    • Anonymous
      February 7, 2012

      make sure if u seeing a pastor, counsellor or friend that if is male make sure a female is present…pastor may just use u , counsellor or friend may do the same so b careful. b sure is male and female that i counselling you

  49. Pusina
    February 7, 2012

    WHOSSSSSSSSSSS what kind of Ti Sal behavoir is that..Papa Bella is thats what u encouraging the youths of Dominica to do..whossss.. little girl papa lord u nasty..thats the only word i can sum up your actions with.. Well u should have a forum for folks coming to DA for carnival. I’m in DA now for the carnival..let me know so we can organize something..I would like to meet my fans..WHOSSSSSSS

  50. Sassy
    February 7, 2012

    the young lady is crying out for help she has realized that she is doing something that is beyond her. she does it enjoys it then regrets it. its so confusing to her that she wants to commit suicide !!! she needs prayer and counselling. We are thinking of starting a group for persons who needs help with relationship and other problems. If anyone is interested you can email me at helpingoneatatime@hotmail.com
    details will be provided regarding:-
    – date of start of group
    – time of meetings
    – contact information other that email
    etc…

  51. smile
    February 7, 2012

    Your viewing of pornography needs to be curbed. It’s not helping, it’s fuelling your addiction. The less you see or are tempted by the pleasure you seek the weaker the cravings will be. Try doing fun activities in the open and public for sometime-this may force you to enjoy yourself without having sex in the picture.Eventually you will come to realize that you don’t need sex to have fun. And of course- most importantly, prayer gives you the strength you need. Try studying the bible,have free bible study sessions with Jehovah’s Witnesses. You should try it, like I said it’s free and we come to you.Steady application of bible principles will help you pull away from that addiction-slowly but surely.

  52. Sout city youts
    February 7, 2012

    You are a very strong young lady, who has acknowledged her weakness or problem and that is the FIRST step towards healing. I would strongly encourage you to seek the professional help that you need before you destroy yourself. Discuss the issue with your parents and ask for their assistance. Here are a few places you can also seek help:

    1.Go to the National AIDS Response Program(upstairs Issa Trading Ltd, Behind Whitchurch supermarket, 266 3570/266 3498) to get tested right away.

    OR

    2. Please refer to the Dominica Council of Women and or Dr. Benjamin, the Chief Psychiatrist( 11-2 Goodwill Road, Pottersville, 448 8899), or a social health worker for counseling (at the Psychiatric Unit of PMH).

    3. You can also refer to the National Youth Council of Dominica, 15 Bathroad, Roseau (close to the New Town Savannah, 448 6944 ) for referal.

    OR

    4. The Dominica Planned Parenthood Associtaion, 64 King George V St, Roseau, 4484043

    Please, do not pay any mind to those negative comments on here, you have realized that you need help, so now let your treatment begin. NO ONE HAS THE RIGHT TO JUDGE YOU BUT God. I wish you much success through this situation.

    One Love, another yout

  53. Waitukubuli
    February 7, 2012

    First, the young lady has done the right thing coming forward and opening up to ‘the public” even if her identity is not revealed. Acknowledging that she is doing wrong and seeking assistance is like opening a remedial door. I think the saddest thing about her situation is that she can’t even open up to her parents, who should be her primary counselors; moreover, knowing the condemnatory attitudes of most Dominicans, she probably feels threatened seeking help elsewhere.

    Many here advise her of using protection, getting tested for STDs, getting Jesus, etc. I am sure she is aware of the implications of her behavior but ostensibly that which she struggles with is much bigger and stronger than her; hence,self-help is not an option.

    Furthermore, telling her she needs Jesus is good – which I agree with, but mere words right now are not going to help. It will take another to carry her to Jesus like the others carried the paralytic. Young lady, do you know of any Christian, WOMAN pastor or minister you feel comfortable approaching? Or better yet are there any woman pastors/ ministers reading this who are willing to reach out to the young lady?

    Also, Young lady, it is quite understandable that right now you might be embarrassed to face anyone about your situation; so, as some have suggested here you should find the contact info for a counselor or anyone of similar vocation and tell them you “plight”. You can start with email until you feel comfortable enough to meet that WOMAN face to face. Avoid seeing a male advisor at all cost. I also, do encourage you to pray and ask God for help, but Father God works through people too so it would be beneficial to find a caring, wise WOMAN of God who can help you in that area.

    I really hope you get help – don’t give up.

  54. February 7, 2012

    Bella I have always realized from the very start that you are quite silly.

    what ever you like to much and have it can become an addiction…like me if I do not eat fish and drink a good water I rather go hungry…but if I do not have it where I am I will surely do without it.
    firstly young lady do your best to keep away from men,,,I did not say to hate men but keep away from them,seek God in your prays every day and night .you must make the first step on yourself because you might see doctors all over but if you refuse to search your own like in order to do what you think is right and good for you ,then you will never change this habit.
    I do not follow any religion but I read the bible,it say if you ask in the name of the lord with conviction and belief he will surely give you what you ask for …just believe ,trust ,pray then god will surely help you.

  55. Shatou Water
    February 7, 2012

    You know what I have the same problem. :-(

  56. innocent
    February 7, 2012

    My heart goes out to u. No phsyciatrist, doctor can help u with this problem. It appears this is more than an addiction. Turn to jesus, I no for a fact he is able to deliver u from that problem. Trust me he works.all the best to u.

    • imhotep
      February 7, 2012

      how can she turn to something that’s not real,it only exist in book call the buybull.there is no historical evidence to prove there was a jesus,,,real name “ZEUS”everytime u guys mention this name i get upset bcuz allu don’t know the truth but beliving the lie.we in 2012 and dominicans still cannot let go that whiteman,by the way the buybull is not a history book but a book of allegory.one love

  57. .....
    February 7, 2012

    but on a real i think we young people need to include Jesus more in our daily lives and affairs cuz without him we wont be able to fight these temptations which are about plaguing us…Let’s lean more on God rather than wordly affairs cuz trust me when u walk with God u are able to fight all these battles that come your way..PRAY darling and Seek the Almighty father

  58. .....
    February 7, 2012

    girlfriend dont follow Triple K and that “keep it bubbling thing…go to WCk and “burst dem bubbles” and u gonna be alright

  59. Concerned citiizen
    February 7, 2012

    Bella…..getting her testing is NOT helping her curb her sexual desires. Tell her to STOP does not help either… She wants to know…the procedures……… Please Bella, Come on!!!.

    p.s. I would not want to think and believe that Bella personality is fake or simply not qualified in this department! Karamba!!!!!!!!

    • Concerned citiizen
      February 7, 2012

      Give me the JOB!!!

    • lala_1992
      February 8, 2012

      What are you talking about? Bella is right…before she goes any further she needs to know her status! Then take it from there with psychiatric help and counselling.

  60. tiny
    February 7, 2012

    Oye …..really people…..so I need to write like I’m writing to an audience of 3 year olds……I said either or…..give your life to Christ or…..there isn’t a third choice you know…..welll actually…one can be a Christian and still live a lifestyle thats displeasing to yhe lord…..that is why I …….oh what the heck…….interprete it howevet you all want

  61. A Stranger, A Friend
    February 7, 2012

    First and most important you sweet beautiful human, how courageous of you to look for help! Truly a brave move on your part and you should be very very proud of yourself for asking for advice and help. I am older now but in my youth I was very promiscuous, I think that many girls go through this when they are trying to feel the love that they are lacking in other areas of their lives. Having a hard time in other areas of your life will only increase the desire to get praise and love from somewhere else, and I can completely understand how mistaking sex with many men can feed this need for love and approval. There is NOTHING wrong with you, YOU ARE STRONGER than you give yourself credit for, you asked and that is a very bold statement. So pause for a moment and give yourself some love for that. I do not know the counseling services that are available here but I do know that going to anyone who will judge you for your actions is NOT the way to go! For me, and just for me, I found a lot of happiness in finding things that I loved to do and doing them as often as I could. I found that my good friends were a healing energy for me, I found that in seeking what I loved to do every day I wasn’t so focused on finding my happiness, my security, my love in men. There is nothing wrong with a healthy sexual appetite; there is danger of course in unprotected sex. And if you are feeling bad about all of the sexual relations you are having then you should change it, there is nothing wrong with you… NOTHING, but if this makes YOU feel bad, it is time to look for something different that makes you feel really good! Better yet, things that make you feel SUPER FABULOUS AND GREAT. Most often when woman are highly sexual with many different partners it is truly a need to feel loved, this again, is HUMAN! I hope that you can find a friend, a counselor, a family member, who would give you the love and support that you are craving and that YOU DESERVE! Again, I cannot stress enough how important it is to only share this with people who WILL NOT JUDGE YOU, if they make you feel worse about the situation it isn’t going to help you at all. In the meanwhile beautiful soul, please use condoms, you already know all the risks so I am not going to preach them again to you… be safe! You can change your behavior as you begin to heal yourself, you will not be able to change a sexually transmitted disease and yes, with HIV out there you are taking your life into your hands. I recommend finding the things that you love and chasing after them with all of the passion you have about sex…. Could you imagine what you could accomplish if you put all that sexual energy into something that YOU LOVE? YOU ARE GOOD, YOU ARE STRONG, YOU ARE LOVED… you must believe this in your core, you must tell yourself this daily, you have to start from within, and do not be hard on yourself, just keep at it one day at a time… the past is the past, also remember that. Start each day new and do the very best that you can, it will get a little easier each and every day! From a stranger who is sending you all the healing energies I can muster and all the strength I have to give!

    • Hmmmmm
      February 7, 2012

      what is this a novel? even i want to read i wont. Ever heard of a SUMMARY??!!

      • A Stranger, A Friend
        February 7, 2012

        It wasn’t written for you… so by all means, move on!

      • Justice and Truth
        February 7, 2012

        @ Hmmmmm

        Do not be rude and negative. You deserve all the thumbs down and more…
        No one asked you to read it. It is your prerogative to read it or not. No one asked you for your negative and degrading comments and advice.
        Have you considered that people write what is in their mind and what passes through their mind? There are times they may only plan to write a line or two and end up with much more. Put on your thinking cap. :twisted: :mrgreen: Try writing something sensible. :twisted: :mrgreen: Be kind.

      • PEACE
        February 8, 2012

        LOL

    • Hmmmmm
      February 7, 2012

      i may just be addicted to wood as well, next time be brief

    • Flying Tiger
      February 7, 2012

      Hi Stranger,
      You are right on the ball with your advice. Not only is it good, but the delivery is also excellent and non-judgemental.

      When I see these stories, I cringe because I only think of my daughter.

  62. O_O
    February 7, 2012

    you’re not acting like a prostitute.. a real prostitute would cuss you off cause you aint getting that MONEY babee!!! you’re acting like a lol… point blank. So yep, you need divine intervention wi

    • Justice and Truth
      February 7, 2012

      O_O

      How did your vulgar comments ever get on this Website. I suppose it was overlooked. :twisted:

  63. A kiss for admin
    February 7, 2012

    you know what the term BINGEING is??? many may not. I occasionally binge from time to time as do MANNNYYYYYYY others within my peer group…. sometimes I go for days drinking, smoking snorting….sometimes I feel my chest get tight and like my heart wants to explode…..many young people know what I am talking about… the thing is we all binge in different ways….but mostly its because we have trouble coping with life issues or extreme hardship…..its our way of escaping for that 1 month vacation that we cannot afford, all in one night……..we go HARD and unshackle ourselves from all inhibitions and care of life itself……the thing is, most of us worse cases wake up the next morning feeling like SHIT and wondering what the ….we just did…….it is an unimaginable price to pay for just a few hours of RELEASE!!!!! I think that we are so used to and at the same time overwhelmed by our mundane existence that we secretly are at times suicidal and dont care what happens tomorrow…….take a look around at carnival in the dark alleys and back streets, ask yourselves whether most of our youth display NORMAL behaviour….. MANY ARE CRYING OUT FOR HELP BUT WHO WILL HEAR?????? ALL WE WILL HEAR IS, “SO IT IS, THAT’S LIFE, YOU HAVE TO WORK HARD FOR WHAT YOU WANT”, some of us work so hard for that little bit of security and peace of mind that never comes…. we dont want to be rich, we just want to be secure, bills paid, commitments upheld and a lil something to save for a rainy day. some life in a perpetual state of emergency….. there are young people who are lost and need help, they need to be able to see the path that is laid out for them….and not just be wandering through life.

    • A kiss for admin
      February 7, 2012

      i feel your pain sweety, you just need to find someone who is right for you and will LISTEN to you, where you can POUR OUT YOUR HEART….I know what it is to carry your pain when no one can identify with it….. it helps me when i listen to some positive music, a little book i have called the ACTS OF FAITH and finding other things that keep your mind engaged so you don’t fall into “that mood”…..go lay your hands on a tree (not a priest) and CONFESS to god, let everything out, cry if you have to
      (crying heals and strengthens your soul), ask god to fortify you and guide you, and if u see fit ask for forgiveness. (BECAUSE NONE OF US ARE PERFECT) those who think they are, are often even more imperfect than those they judge. take courage and try to live one day at a time.

      • Reader
        February 7, 2012

        The most genuine response!! Thanks … I also need that.

  64. Patriotic Citizen
    February 7, 2012

    well, admittance is the first step to any problem… Now you should seek some form of counselling since you mentioned “suicidal”… You should try visiting someone who may have had prior experience because within Dominica therapy relative to your case is hardly available… Try researching your current situation using online resources and analyze what similar people in your situation may have done!
    Best of Luck!

  65. G-Man
    February 7, 2012

    im guessing thats a town chick….smh holla @ me tho, i’ll make your resume even more impressive. :mrgreen:

  66. Shameless
    February 7, 2012

    Hopefully the political leader will read this and his memory will figure out who you are and will come to your rescue. I sincerely hope he did not mess with you when you were still under age. Please take some time and go see the psychiatrist or a health professional that you deem trust worthy. May god look over you as you try to resolve this very personal issue. I will say a prayer for you.

    • Lance Bokit
      February 9, 2012

      True say. Political leader could mean Run, Spraggs, Eddoes, Scare 8, RooZee or Early. I sincerely hope dat letter isi untrue. I will still pray for dat child but alas.

  67. john
    February 7, 2012

    hello desperate,He all are addicted to things in life such as a candy bar,shoes,clothes,sex, lying flirting et.The first phase is realizing dat u have a problem and looking for ways to solve them which is what u have done. The second step is saying no to ur urge,men u would target and those who will target u and stop looking at porn.Rather focus on a hobby which u enjoy doing such as playing netball.desperate it will not be easy but u have to make the sacrifice to try in order to succeed. Never stop try until u achieve ur destine.its k if u make a mistake in the process of trying,what counts is u continuing trying.

  68. But How???
    February 7, 2012

    Mouth of the South,,,, i checking u would do a great job as the new Bella ehhhh…. wah u say…. a challenge…

  69. eagles125
    February 7, 2012

    You need to get Jesus.

    • innocent
      February 7, 2012

      i totally agree with u..sweety u need jesus…………..18yrs n slept with over 20 men n kissed over 30…….chick am a 25yr old dominican girl only slept with two guys n the second am still in a relationship with him for over 3 yrs…………your going down a dirty road…clean up ur life

  70. Dominican to D bone
    February 7, 2012

    It hurt my heart to see hear about this young lady. I wish I could talk to her on a regular. You really sound like you have an addiction.

    Please young lady understand that the HIV/AIDS virus can remain dormant in you system for 6months to a year. So unless you have been tested in the past year you never know. Your issues will not go away overnight and telling you to stop having intercourse may not work. But what I can say if you don’t have protection, don’t do anything.

    Also seek help. I see others posted information on doctors. Please reach out to a Doctor or therapist for help. You do not want to ruin your life, maybe one day you will find a good man. Pray for yourself and I will do the same for you.

  71. Brandon
    February 7, 2012

    The girl asking for help but the majority telling her “pray for god help” -_- others saying she possessed. Omfg if allu doe have sensible advice doe give at all. Some of u telling we to stop she already knows and acknowledge the fact that she has to stop and she wants to stop hence her cry for help where do people get there sense. My advice to he girl is 1st surround urself with positive people, people u know will help make a positive influence in ur life 2nd forgive urself for ur mistakes and if u need help for that see a shrink or sumn, like the ones some people recommended on here. 3 rd. come clean to ur mom and dad set things straight . 4th set goals for ur life, positive ones, if u need help go to ur parents. And 5th start praying to god for forgiveness to help keep ur religious hope. That’s my advice and for people who doe know how to give advice stfu. God not going to help her if she not helping herself l. Telling her pray to god is not gonna cut it alone cus god not going to con down and say ” hey!! This is what u has to do ” hope u the girl is ok

  72. :(
    February 7, 2012

    .go take a hiv test

  73. jus so!!
    February 7, 2012

    s….once it makes u happy and u enjoy it…thoughts of becomin a lesbian…u should try puttin ur name so i could find u :-D

  74. Massacre Girl
    February 7, 2012

    @ Tiny, you should be helping her n giving her good advice not encouraging her to continue this lifestyle.. smh

  75. G-Man
    February 7, 2012

    holla @ me 225****, i’ll calm that fire :mrgreen:

  76. oh dear
    February 7, 2012

    Dominican Child, Hey, Shwaniyah u guys can b the new bella..trust me i reading bella comment and de child ain’t getting help at all.. up till now bella have not told her where to get help. So my girl please check (Dr. Benjamin at 448 8899) (Tina Alexander at
    449 8593) I have an 11yr old and it tells me that i need to pay close attention to her. cause parents can b strict and not pay attention to their children’s needs. when they have strict parents is when they are doing alot under the covers. even with fmaily members, so we mothers need to be closer to our girls.

  77. Jahyout
    February 7, 2012

    My Girl you need to slow and and seek Jah help before its to late.

  78. Not a Nymph
    February 7, 2012

    There are lots of other women out there with the same issues. Glad that you are reaching out for help. I hope that others will sympathis with your situation and not chastise you verbally.You seem to be a nymphomaniac. I suggest you get some psycological help. I am not sure if Dominica has a sex therapist, but you can start with what is available. You can also go on line to do some research. You need to protect yourself at all times, be safe on that one. People are going to steriotype you so becareful who you open out to. I see you are willing get help, so do it as soon as possible, before the inevitable happens. Good luck with this and may God walk with you.

  79. tiny
    February 7, 2012

    Even though you enjoy it I bet they enjoy it more than you…so I really think you should start charging these guys…..cut of contact with those who do not want to pay…..that is one way of reducing the number of men

    • tiny
      February 7, 2012

      Life man..life…..it is hard….we need God you need god….we all have our trials…..learn to deppend on hgod spend time in his word ….even this is hard…bottomline….either you decide to live for god……..or be the best—– that you can be and dont have no regrets….

    • Arrested
      February 7, 2012

      I hate calling people names but the first thought that came to my mind after reading your comment “she’s so stupid!” (WRONG OF ME, BUT I THOUGHT IT!)

      you are telling her to charge the guys, encouraging her to prostitute herself, then you are telling her she needs God. Maybe you need to find him first and evaluate your ideas about what he is saying to you…

      Maybe Bella should advise you!

    • lol
      February 7, 2012

      :mrgreen:

  80. Angel
    February 7, 2012

    she needs help sounds like someone i no the only help there is god

  81. February 7, 2012

    but how come no one has asked “which political leader the young woman referring to nuh”… is it in the A.M or P.M

    • DANZIGER
      February 7, 2012

      Mouth of the south, Why did u jump on the PM ?I think u have a direct problem with the PM MAYBE IS WITH U.

  82. February 7, 2012

    i do not think that is all you should say on the matter. i do not even think you should be dealing with these issues u do not act like a por. did u hear the child say she is sometimes sucidial who should she talk to…

  83. Carib Diva 1
    February 7, 2012

    Well sex addiction I guess. But she hasn’t given a thought to HIV/AIDS or stds. As she said she is lucky, has she gotten tested in the last six months? Girl you are too young for this sort of thing in this day and age, you are playing with fire and will destroy your life..period. I don’t know how much education they have to give on this sort of thing again. No one pays attention it seems

  84. PUSS
    February 7, 2012

    There are many just like you here in dominica and sadly they do not have much of a choice sometimes they are given away for cash by parents or they are one of the less fortunate ones. You have the sanity to compare yourself to that of a prostitute i take it to mean you are sane enoughto stop…. you have no mental issues preventing you from doing what you need to do. I think its a matter of choice. but i hope you acknowledge the fact that the indispensable first step to getting the things you want out of life is to decide what you want.”

  85. February 7, 2012

    Bella you could simply say “um missy i’m out of ideas right now… here’s my number call me later” because nothing you said dere can help the young lady… talking about STD… u think she don’t know so already deeennnnn… where can you go in dominica to seek help nuh?? if you go to most pastor’s.. they want there share… priest doesn’t do confessions again… talk to a doctor but you will bump with them everyday in roseau… my girl your best bet is to pray to God to guide and protect you… at the same time avoid dealing in such situations…. think about your future and goals and plan on achieving them in positive ways… all those negative friends you have throw them away and surround yourself with positive people… it must have someone you know that you can talk to… maybe your mom… talk about it and seek advice…. oh and don’t go on the porn sites… go on google and research how to block x-rated sites on a computer… even if you know how to put it off… but the task of always having to allow x-rated sites on the pc everytime you ‘feel’ the urge to will by then deter you from doing so… get a positive hobby… try taking up art… join the flag wavers…. do something…

  86. Massacre Girl
    February 7, 2012

    OMG! Bella is getting worse every day! Girl honestly I think you are demon possessed. I don’t even know what to say to you and what hurts is that u know what u are doing is wrong and u r still doing it. Sweetie u need to stop, u really need to stop, this is not healthy. U mentioned about settling down, girlfriend its gonna be hard for a man to take u in when ur living that kind of lifestyle especially if u caught a disease. Plz I’m beggin u get yourself together before it is too late for u. Whatever problems u are having that may be causing u to live that way, my girl take it to God he’s the great problem fixer!

    • February 7, 2012

      ‘demon possessed’… you worst dan bella urselft… i might just have to call you ‘belle tung’ :-x

    • Reader
      February 7, 2012

      Sounds like you live in a bubble!!

    • Mercy&Grace
      February 7, 2012

      I THING THAT SHE IS DEMON POSSESSED AS WELL, SOME DOOR IN HER LIFE WAS OPEN TO INVITE THESE demons IN, I really need to help this girl, Now you need a bible, and visit Dominica source, am going to write what you need to do there OK;

  87. cautious
    February 7, 2012

    well well…least you try to tell the truth,but i think Bella should give you better advice like trying to see a shrink or something join youth groups or just try to focus on more positive things you have to try realize that everything that glitters is not gold and you maybe loving your sexual life now but think bout the future for a change …you might not like what you see…. good-luck :)

    • hahaha
      February 7, 2012

      Is advice like that making people say the stories are made up you know. What happen to bella nor? Is like she shocked out of her panties. :mrgreen:

  88. Hey
    February 7, 2012

    Bella I think you should get some better advice for the girl. you sound like you punishing her-what shocked what you are? STupes. bella offer the child help- you getting her more worried and paranoid here. She already knows she’s in trouble-that’s why she wrote!

  89. Dominican Child
    February 7, 2012

    Some of us might laugh and call this young lady dirty names but it’s a serious psycholigical problem she’s dealing with.
    Young lady you need counselling. Ms. Tina Alexander can give you some good advice as well as Dr. Benjamin.. It’s gonna be tough but you can overcome it if you’re determined.
    Meantime, use protection please.

  90. February 7, 2012

    Desperate,

    You need self help and to pray and command this sex spirit out of your body. Ask it to leave “speak it out” and be serious about it!

    You just have to develop a better love for yourself and you will eventually stop these things.

    You’re worth so much more I’m guessing perhaps you don’t know it yet

    BELLA THATS THE BEST YOU CAN SAY!… Cha..

    C’mon

    • Anonymous
      February 7, 2012

      i checking the same thing…that’s all BELLA could come up with? i’ve seen better advice from BELLA for less serious problems…

  91. dsm
    February 7, 2012

    she needs a talk with Dr Benjamin

    • Hey
      February 7, 2012

      Or Dr. Esprit. She really needs to professional advice. Young Lady please check the Mental Health Unit for help. Remember that the Psychiatrists are there help you and prevent you from getting to a state where someone else has to ask for help for you.

  92. Hey
    February 7, 2012

    Young lady- say a prayer and I’m saying one for you as well. You will need proffesional help as this is an addiction.

  93. Lady G
    February 7, 2012

    Good advice Bella

  94. February 7, 2012

    woyy woyy woyyy something happening, and it exciting………..

  95. lisad
    February 7, 2012

    One good thing is that you have admitted that you have a problem and that’s the first step.You do need to see a professional counsellor immediately. This is a dangerous lifestyle

    • Anonymous
      February 7, 2012

      Dear Desperate,
      I am presently the counsellor attached to the Acute Psychiatric Unit at the Hospital.I work with Dr Benjamin along with a few others on the Community Mental Health Team.I have seen quite a few young persons in this very situation, so I know what you have just disclosed is not easy. I am willing to provide therapy at your convenience free of any cost.My personal number is 285-8282

      • isupport
        February 8, 2012

        Thank you for a genuine offer of help from within. I am a Board Certified Psychiatric Nurse and I am also willing to help, but I will only be in DA for 2 short weeks. This case warrants care and counselling. God bless you, you are not a prostitute. You are not a bad person. You sound like an intelligent young woman whose wires got crossed at the age of 11(too young)Do not give up. Many of us suffered worst and we a re now successful professionals. We all have a story. You are someone looking for love down the wrong avenue. Please take the offer of help from the counsellor listed above. I will keep you in my prayers.

      • Ira
        February 8, 2012

        @Anonymous I hope your offer to help is sincere. I know some people are quick to offer help only to turn around and stab you in the back…professionals and all. Desperate, you are not a prostute and you are not alone. I hope you’ll at least call the Counsellor and make sure he/she is legit. I’ll keep you in my prayers and I hope you get the help you need. Don’t give up on yourself.

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