![\"Dear](\"http:\/\/dominicanewsonline.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/02\/new-dear-bella.png\")
I am a young lady from another island and a former secondary school teacher.<\/p>\nI am a young lady from another island and a former secondary school teacher.<\/p>\n
I am presently living in Dominica with my Dominican husband. I migrated to Dominica recently with my husband and we have separated because our marriage is a big joke to him.<\/p>\n
I had children before I got married and my husband was aware of that but he insists on treating my children terribly, carrying on verbal quarrels for no reason.<\/p>\n
Sometimes the children can be rude to him, I agree, but it is because he keeps telling them that they are in his house, and this is his house, not their fathers house and he wishes he can make them leave.<\/p>\n
It is so hard for me because I am suppose to protect my children as a mother and also love my husband as a wife. He is always angry at us in the home and I believe that is because of the children and their presence.<\/p>\n
We have a child together now and during my pregnancy I was treated really terribly by my husband. My husband puts off the cable, electricity, the gas on me when he believes I am rude to him, as he puts it.<\/p>\n
He gave me a phone and takes it also when he thinks I am rude to him. He also takes the car keys to punish me when he is mad. He refuses to go to immigration to sign the documents so that I can find a job in which to help myself and children.<\/p>\n
I feel so trapped and I have regretted ever meeting this man and marrying him. He is mean and wicked and my youngest child wishes to go back home because he is just not happy in Dominica. I too am not happy. I was living a pretty comfortable life at home and came to this island to start a life with this man and this man has brought nothing but pain in my life.<\/p>\n
Can you please give me some advice.<\/p>\n
Trapped<\/strong><\/p>\n ……………………………………………………………………………………………<\/p>\n Dear Trapped,<\/p>\n It is always a sad thing for me personally when there is a report of abuse in a family, because the only advise that one can give to that person is to leave.\u00a0 Leaving an abusive relationship is not an option but a must.<\/p>\n The most difficult part of leaving is how, when, to where…and all the other questions that come with change.\u00a0 In your case, this relationship produced a child and you have to think of the child’s relationship to his father after.\u00a0 Do not hold your child as bait to have the father at your beck and call.<\/p>\n You need to get at least one person physically close to you, in whom you can confide.\u00a0 That person will be the one to encourage you to keep momentum is your decision to move.\u00a0 You would have to choose on which island you want to continue raising your children.\u00a0 It appears that the memories of Dominica are not the happiest, and that you can better navigate your way through your country, but realistically, as you have been unemployed, you will not be able to get your passage money out of Dominica, so you will have to settle here a little longer as you organize and decide to return home.<\/p>\n If you are a university graduate, you do not need a work permit to start work on Dominica.\u00a0 You can apply for a job and within six months of employment you will put in your application.\u00a0 If you do not have a university degree, the first thing that you will need to do, is to go to immigration with a copy of all of your legal documents, especially your marriage certificate.\u00a0 The Dominican Registry is an open registry and it is possible that you will also be able to get a copy of your husband’s birth certificate.\u00a0 Take these to the immigration office and explain to them how long you have been living on island and how you can contribute to the economy.\u00a0\u00a0 Find out the procedures required and make a move towards getting a work permit on island.\u00a0 Should you need a lawyer, the Legal Aide Clinic will be able to help you in providing free or very inexpensive service.\u00a0 Once you get your work permit, you can exercise some more independence and get your own place to stay to have some peace of mind for yourself and your children.\u00a0 Who knows, maybe you all will just see the beauty of our nature island and want to make here home.<\/p>\n In life, we may make mistakes, but we cannot live in regret over them.\u00a0 Don’t forget the woman you were when you met your husband and don’t stop being that.\u00a0 That will keep you sane for your sake and that of your children.\u00a0 You are a secondary school teacher, who were raising children on your own, and surviving just fine.<\/p>\n Bella<\/strong><\/p>\n Have a problem? Write to Dear Bella at dominicanewsonline@gmail.com. Dear Bella is published on Tuesdays. All letters are subject to editing and the editor has the right to not publish an article if it does not meet the company\u2019s editorial standards. Also, the advice given is not necessarily expert advice, and is basically an opinion, therefore we accept no liability that result from giving any opinion. As such we encourage you to seek the advice of a professional counselor.<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"I am a young lady from another island and a former secondary school teacher. I am presently living in Dominica with my Dominican husband. I migrated to Dominica recently with my husband and we have separated because our marriage is…","protected":false},"author":16,"featured_media":55632,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_cbd_carousel_blocks":"[]","footnotes":""},"categories":[26],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-105108","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-dear-bella"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\n