{"id":124116,"date":"2014-09-22T13:56:52","date_gmt":"2014-09-22T17:56:52","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/dominicanewsonline.com\/news\/?p=124116"},"modified":"2014-09-22T13:57:50","modified_gmt":"2014-09-22T17:57:50","slug":"business-life-let-good-things-define","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/dominicanewsonline.com\/news\/homepage\/columns\/business-life-let-good-things-define\/","title":{"rendered":"BUSINESS &#038; LIFE: Let the Good Things Define You"},"content":{"rendered":"<figure id=\"attachment_83298\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-83298\" style=\"width: 160px\" class=\"wp-caption alignleft\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-83298\" src=\"http:\/\/dominicanewsonline.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/01\/valda-henry.jpg\" alt=\"Dr. Valda Henry\" width=\"160\" height=\"240\" srcset=\"https:\/\/dominicanewsonline.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/01\/valda-henry.jpg 160w, https:\/\/dominicanewsonline.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/01\/valda-henry-100x150.jpg 100w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 160px) 100vw, 160px\" \/><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-83298\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Dr. Valda Henry<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>I have not issued an article for about three weeks.\u00a0 My Little Nathan returned home after his summer vacation.\u00a0 The first week, I was too excited preparing for his return, the second week was enjoying his return and doing all the things he wanted like making ice pops, going to the beach, cooking his favourite things, baking cookies and the third week was getting ready and acclimatising to school and a new class.\u00a0 I also celebrated another year giving thanks. It was a weekend of celebrations as my staff, family and friends went all out demonstrating how well loved I am!\u00a0 I am back again!!!<\/p>\n<p>Before I delve in the topic of the day, I take this opportunity to invite you to a presentation on \u201cInfluential and Effective Communication,\u201d and the Book Launch of \u201cThe Pin Drop Principle,\u201d by David Lewis and Gary Mills, co-founders of Pinnacle Performance Company based in the US, at the Garraway Hotel on Wednesday, September 24, 2014 at 7pm.\u00a0 See you there!!!\u00a0 Tune in to \u201cThe Cutting Edge of Business,\u201d on Tuesday, September 23, 2014at 8:30pm on Marpin, Channel 5 to \u201cmeet\u201d David and Gary before Wednesday evening!<\/p>\n<p>At VF Inc.\u2019s inaugural Family Symposium on August 31, 2014, ASP Claude Weekes, in his presentation on the topic, \u201cOur Family, Our Home, Our Brand,\u201d shared some of his childhood experiences and was candid about his family life.\u00a0 One of the sentences, which struck a chord, \u201cLet the good things define you,\u201d is the topic of today.\u00a0 This sentence is powerful for it beckons and challenges us to focus on the good and use this to propel us to act and become.\u00a0 It also demands that we take responsibility and ownership for our actions and not adopt a victim mentality, holding others fully responsible for the negative outcomes of our lives.<\/p>\n<p>ASP Weekes spoke about the challenges growing up with a mentally challenged mother, not knowing his father, being a \u201cchild of the State,\u201d dependent on the Welfare department, subject to bullying and taunting by children as well as adults, being humiliated by those in authority including the principal of his secondary school.\u00a0 The cumulative effect of all of this could have been an angry, misdirected individual subject to a life of crime and ending up in the state penitentiary.\u00a0 He however chose to focus on the good of his childhood: the love of his mother, the kindness of neighbours, teachers who saw his potential and believed in him and his dreams of his future. There is still anger at society that chooses to label children and others based on their circumstances, however that anger is directed at making a positive difference in the lives of others and in giving them hope.\u00a0 He chose to focus and allow the good things to define him.<\/p>\n<p>This lesson is applicable in all areas of our lives: home, church, school and work.\u00a0 It is easier to dwell on the negatives.\u00a0 It is easier to hold on to a grudge.\u00a0 It is easier to be angry and blame others for our failings and shortcomings.\u00a0 It is easier to wait on others to make the first move.\u00a0 It is easier to not address the issues that are confronting us.\u00a0 It is easier, however, easier does not necessarily been better.\u00a0 Easier does not mean growth and development.\u00a0 Easier does not mean peace and contentment.\u00a0 Easier does not mean fulfilment.<\/p>\n<p>It calls us to acknowledge what is not working and what is causing us pain.\u00a0 It demands that we confront our past and pain and forces us to find solutions.\u00a0 It forces us to forgive, to look for the good and use that good to transform our lives. \u00a0It forces us to hold ourselves to account, to create the future we want.\u00a0 It forces us to recognise and accept \u201ceasier,\u201d is not an option for us.<\/p>\n<p>If \u201ceasier is not an option,\u201d how then are we to create the future we want and transform our lives?\u00a0 How do we look for the good and forgive?\u00a0 How do we let go of our anger or direct our anger positively?\u00a0 How do we move on?\u00a0 Why must we not take the easier route<\/p>\n<p>I start by answering the last question first:\u00a0 Easier is not an option because it means we won\u2019t fulfil our God-given purpose, and this is one of our key responsibilities.\u00a0 The answer to the other questions, in my view, begins with a heart and attitude of thankfulness, for when we are thankful we look for and find the good in all situations.\u00a0\u00a0 When we are wronged, if we have a heart or attitude of thankfulness, we look for the good in the person or the good they may have done for us, and we let the good cover the bad, forgive, if needed open a dialogue and let it go.\u00a0\u00a0 Sometimes, it is not possible to let go and move on, until a conversation has been kept.\u00a0 If this is what is needed to be able to move on, initiate contact and ask for the conversation.\u00a0 One may have to meet in a neutral place or sometimes in the presence of others to have the conversation.\u00a0 In that conversation, be clear it is not about assigning blame but about stating how you feel and what action you require of the person.\u00a0 However, do not allow the person\u2019s response determine whether you forgive and move on.\u00a0 Be thankful, you had the opportunity to say how you felt or initiated contact, if the person refused to even meet.<\/p>\n<p>In all situations, focus on the lessons.\u00a0 If you have\/had a terrible colleague or supervisor\/manager, instead of focussing on how terrible the person is, focus on what you are learning about management, leadership and relationship management.\u00a0 If you have poor relationship focus on what you are learning about the building blocks of effective relationships. \u00a0\u00a0If you are going through or went through a difficult time: financially, emotionally or spiritually, focus on what you learnt about financial prudence, self worth and faith, respectively.<\/p>\n<p>In essence, in letting our good define us, we must be mindful of our thoughts, our actions, our habits and character, as in the words of the famous motivational poster:<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWatch your thoughts for they become your words;<\/p>\n<p>Watch your words for they become your actions;<\/p>\n<p>Watch your actions for they become your habits;<\/p>\n<p>Watch your habits for they become your character;<\/p>\n<p>Watch your character for it becomes your destiny.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I can be contacted at <a href=\"mailto:info@vfinc.org\">info@vfinc.org<\/a> or Tel: 767 449 9649.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Until we meet again, may the Lord continue to Keep us in the Palm of His Hands.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"I have not issued an article for about three weeks.\u00a0 My Little Nathan returned home after his summer vacation.\u00a0 The first week, I was too excited preparing for his return, the second week was enjoying his return and doing all&#8230;","protected":false},"author":15,"featured_media":83298,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_cbd_carousel_blocks":"[]","footnotes":""},"categories":[89,30],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-124116","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-business-life","category-columns"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.6 - 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