{"id":13850,"date":"2010-07-26T10:22:19","date_gmt":"2010-07-26T14:22:19","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/dominicanewsonline.com\/?p=13850"},"modified":"2010-07-26T10:22:19","modified_gmt":"2010-07-26T14:22:19","slug":"caught-up-in-a-family-conflict","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/dominicanewsonline.com\/news\/homepage\/columns\/dear-bella\/caught-up-in-a-family-conflict\/","title":{"rendered":"Caught up in a family conflict"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong><a href=\"\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/07\/bellaLogo4212.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-full wp-image-13852\" title=\"bellaLogo42\" src=\"\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/07\/bellaLogo4212.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"89\" srcset=\"https:\/\/dominicanewsonline.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/07\/bellaLogo4212.jpg 300w, https:\/\/dominicanewsonline.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/07\/bellaLogo4212-150x44.jpg 150w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><\/a>Dear Bella: <\/strong>I am between a rock and a hard place and don\u2019t know what to do. First of all you have been doing a good job giving advice and opinion; keep up the good work. I am being forced to choose sides between my second cousin and my aunt.<\/p>\n<p>They have been great people to me; I used to live with my cousin and she used to take care of me financially at one point in my life and my aunt on the other hand got me my first job soon after I finished school and I lived with her for approximately two months pro-bono.<\/p>\n<p>My aunt\u2019s boyfriend told my aunt that he slept with my cousin which is her first cousin and told her that they are still corresponding. My aunt made a big confusion and our family split apart for the exception of me not choosing sides. I am still speaking to both of them. My cousin said that there was no such thing but refused to stop talking to my aunt\u2019s boyfriend. To tell you the truth Bella I don\u2019t know what to believe because my aunt\u2019s boyfriend is a big time liar and he will tell her one thing and go back and tell my cousin another. \u00a0Now my aunt is telling me to choose sides.<\/p>\n<p>Dear Anonymous,<\/p>\n<p>You must let you aunt down softly, but still speak the truth which may hurt her. Apparently, this showdown is as a result of a man who is not even faithful to your aunt. Let her know that she needs to stop making this man cause disunity within the family, and you would never choose him over them because that is what she\u2019s basically asking you to do. Tell her how you mean so much to her as well as your cousin and she knows in her heart that her boyfriend is shady, but she is just denying it.<\/p>\n<p>Tell her your cousin was not right to sleep with your aunt\u2019s boyfriend; however it takes two to tango, and while it may be hurtful she has to learn to forgive her cousin eventually. Say to her that you do not want to get caught up in this confusion but you just want your family back the way things were and that\u2019s why you cannot pick sides. Also avoid discussing the matter with your aunt and cousin or participating in any of their gossiping of each other.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Bella.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>Have a problem? Write to Dear Bella at  dominicanewsonline@gmail.com. Dear Bella is published everyday. All  letters are subject to editing and the editor has the right to not  publish an article if it does not meet the company\u2019s editorial  standards. Also, the advice given is not necessarily expert advice, and  is basically an opinion, therefore we accept no liability that result  from giving any opinion. As such we encourage you to seek the advice of a  professional counselor<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Dear Bella: I am between a rock and a hard place and don\u2019t know what to do. 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