DEAR BELLA: My ex’s new wife is causing drama with my son

Dear BellaDear Bella,

My ex’s new wife is not allowing him to take care of his child properly.

She has influenced him bigtime. While me and him were together he was also dating her. But I didn’t know.

Anyway, I got pregnant and when I found out about them I left him. I didn’t want to be in any triangle.

He decided that he will always take care of his son and he remained true to that.

But these days I find the money has been decreasing and even the times he and his son spend together has been minimized.

Whenever I call the house she always finds a reason why he can’t come to the phone.

When my son goes over on weekends he tells me she treats him badly.

I have spoken to the man about it but he says I’m just jealous.

The woman would send me nasty messages on Facebook and Whatsapp. A recent one was “you dressing up and buying cloths with the money he gives you for child support but it will stop”.

Honestly, my son’s dad is well off. So, he would give me about 800 a week and yes, I spend it on myself too because I need my “sahleh”.
After all, he’s the reason why I am a single mom and he married someone else.

So now I get $500 a week. That’s unacceptable. And I know she’s the reason. So, I need to know how to go around it.

My son is 9 years old.

BabyMamaDrama

………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Hello BabyMamaDrama

$800 a week is more than the legal child support requirement. Be thankful.

That amounts to $2,000 a month. Some people have to work two months to make that kind of money.

If you challenge the situation you could be down to $175 a week which is what is allowed by the laws in Dominica.

You admit that you spend the money on yourself too. You are not this man’s responsibility so I would think a responsible mother would at least save a buck or two for your son to cater for “rainy days”.

I don’t know what is “saleh” but I’m thinking it’s something like “pay me for the time I spent with you?”

I am sure if I am wrong-my readers here will correct me in the worst way.

All I am saying is that accept the child support money and be thankful and wise in your spending.

If this man’s wife already hates you, any contention about child support money could put you further down the receiving end than up.

Be wise.

Best,

Bella

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17 Comments

  1. free
    October 4, 2018

    Lady keep your child with you….ignore the man

  2. mention
    October 4, 2018

    well if i am getting $800 a week which amounts to $3200 i stop working immediately. no tax. No wonder she comfortable cuz de money coming so fast without she burning a sweat. My advice is go get a job if u dont have one.

  3. Dominican
    October 2, 2018

    $2000 a month for a 9 year old boy is not enough? Talk about greedy… Whoever feels sorry for this woman is insane.

  4. Jeff
    October 1, 2018

    The wife is right. U should take your saler when u was with him so u mean u still screwing the lady man u talking bout saler

  5. Zandoli
    October 1, 2018

    Typical ghetto woman. Lucky thing he did not marry you.

  6. Me
    October 1, 2018

    Well well bella you hit rock bottom. You had me up to $900.00 a week. I am sure is not national banl manager you talking about so in short u too dam lie if nobody not writing close down de column. Thats all I have to say.

  7. Dams
    October 1, 2018

    What he a drug dealer lady I dont care how much he well off that’s lie 800

  8. Onlooker
    October 1, 2018

    Um Bella ,
    Let the woman do as she wish; the court maximum is $75 a week! But on the other hand, those men who allow women to come between them and their children are “no-good” according to my mother. Later on when the children grown they are first to want centre stage. They need to set those women straight. woman come and woman go, your kids are forever!

  9. Kermit
    October 1, 2018

    $800 a week???? Awa it doe have millionaire like that in a dominica and who that well off have their woman and child with them. However, if this story is true he damn right to stop that because what you doing with $2400.00 a month. No where in the story I seeing you have you working. Go and work!

  10. A_DAMassive
    October 1, 2018

    That is right, tell her like it is Bella, tell her. You did not know, but when you found out you left him. However: “After all, he’s the reason why I am a single mom and he married someone else.” How can you say that when you found out later he was married. You did not tell Bella all there needs to be known.

    I need my “sahleh”. Shame on you for using your son’s money and not even being ashamed to say that!!! If you eat his money, who is gonna pay for his education? Lame…..

    OMG. DAD GIVE HER $100 BEAUSE YOUR SON HASTO EAT, BUTPUT THE REST IN A CUSTODIAL ACCOUNT FOR HIM. HE WILL END UP WITH NOTHING AT THE END, AND AFTER ALL THE MONEY YOU GAVE HER, YOU BOTH WILL STILL BE IN THE SAME BOAT.

  11. brighter days
    October 1, 2018

    that is a damn lie. who man in Domnica giving woman $800.00 a week for child support??
    stupes tan

    • Regi
      October 1, 2018

      :mrgreen: so funnie

    • Ashma
      October 1, 2018

      You not hearing the man well off den?

    • Agirl
      October 1, 2018

      I checking…but the wifey reduce that to $500 a week, still generous!! And she so sot she still saying she taking the money to shop for herself. Lord some woman bold!!

  12. waypapa
    October 1, 2018

    Hahaha sound like Bella make that one up we cuz a woman cant be so stupid and idle to send that. I was reading well until I reached 800 a week and spend it on yourself. You are lying on the child father and his wife. This cant be even Dominica because no man here even well off gives all that for child support unless is drugs he selling. But to humour this lie, Go find work to do and see how hard it is to make $800 a week. If God forbid the father passes how will you get $800 a week to support your lifestyle? If you consider he owes you a saleh are you calling yourself a street walker, the oldest professional in the world?

    Bella self you cant be Dominican if you don’t know what SALEH is, even Marigot people know this patois word. This story is just a joke but Bella your advice is cool this time.

    • Dominican
      October 2, 2018

      Speak for yourself… I am Dominican and dont knw what it means. Being Dominican doesnt mean you would know every patois word in d dictionary..

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