Dear BellaDear Bella,

My friend is in love with a police officer, who happens to be married and has his wife, and he also beats her.

And she is afraid of telling anyone.

I realized he is a control freak because whenever we go out, he would call and ask her to be home by this time and that time. Sometimes she would get afraid if he calls before she gets home.

I have seen marks over her body and she would give me excuses. Until she broke down in tears and told me he beats her.

I am worried about my best friend as this relationship is unhealthy.

But she loves him so much I don’t want to intrude and I end up losing her in the process.

Worried

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Dear Worried,

Married and abusive. This is a double whammy because your friend is getting blows for nothing.

It is normal to worry about the people we love and in your case, you love your friend. It is one thing to be in an abusive relationship with a control freak but to add insult to injury he is married with a family.

Surely your friend ought to know that she cannot accept any form of abuse from any man, much less a married one.

I suggest you let your friend know your concerns and encourage her to get out of the relationship.

Keep in mind she may not because from what you’ve said she loves him.

If she does agree to end it, she needs to ensure that she has some sort of protection against him whether it is by law or otherwise because he will come after her.

Nonetheless, you should not discourage her from doing the right thing.

Best

Bella

Have a problem? Write to Dear Bella at news@dominicanewsonline.com. Dear Bella is published every Wednesday. All letters are subject to editing and the editor has the right to not publish an article if it does not meet the company’s editorial standards. Also, the advice given is not necessarily expert advice, and is basically an opinion, therefore we accept no liability that result from giving any opinion. As such we encourage you to seek the advice of a professional counselor.