Dear BellaDear Bella,

My husband’s children hate me. Notice I didn’t say “step-kids” because Bella I don’t even want them on my “Step”. These children are brazen. Terrible, just like the woman who gave birth to them.

My husband and I have been married for two years now and the kids are over 30 and they both have jobs. He divorced his wife who took everything he had and fled with some young boy (so I have heard).

So, when I met my husband he had nothing, no assets, only a good job and a car because he left the home for his kids. Now Bella two years in the making and he is slowly getting back on his feet.

He lives with me and he is now saving so he can start over, build a new home and so on.

But these children “shayshaying” my husband. Always want something. If it isn’t money for food, clothes and medicals they always come up with some “never heard about” dilemma.

I am believing that they are simply using him. In the two years, we were together he never got a birthday card, Christmas gift or nothing.

Only when I see them is when they picking up money and when they come to raid my fridge.

I am sick and tired of these terrible children. I want to ask them to stay away from my home but I can’t.

I want to tell my husband be careful about giving them so much but Dominican men always find an excuse to harbor their children. What should I

What should I do?

I am fed up Bella. Trust me!

Fed Up
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Dear Fed Up,

If it’s one thing I realize from your letter is that you do sound frustrated and if what you’ve said it true, that can drive anybody up the wall.

You need to sit with your husband and speak with him about your concerns.

But you cannot go to him with that kind of anger because that can turn him off. Be as subtle as you can.

Of course his children are his, and he will feel a level of loyalty to them but they are grown people and should be able to provide basic needs for themselves.

If he is to bounce back from walking out of marriage with nothing, then he cannot be giving money loosely to children who are adults.

There will be instances where parents may have to lend financial support to their children given the circumstances and you cannot be angry at that.

But if they employed they should be able to buy their own food, cloths and take care of the financial needs. If not, then they might as well quit their jobs.

Having a conversation with your husband could be the beginning of the end of this situation.

Best,
Bella

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