It seems that we only speak out against child abuse when it has graced social media. We completely disregard it when it is right in front of us. Who should defend and speak out for the vulnerable when they have been silenced by their abusers? The burden is left to us; the family, the community, the country.
As we may be aware, child sexual abuse is not a new phenomenon. It is present in every community around Dominica. As a young person, I believe that we should not voice our concerns only when child abuse has become a series of events. Stop it now! Interestingly, growing up in a rural community, I have witnessed and can attest that it is the most vulnerable who are affected by child sexual abuse. Children are young, inexperienced and are unable to make critical decisions which guide their lives. The abusers are predators feeding on their weaknesses to force them into believing that there is ‘nothing wrong’ with their actions.
We’ve all been young. Have your parents ever told you if you do not come home by the time the streetlights come on that you’d be punished? As soon as that time arrives we rush home since we are afraid of the consequences. Similarly, the victims are silenced through threats and they fear that the consequences of them speaking out would affect them even more than the cruel abuse. We need to understand that the psychological scars are far more grave than the physical impacts. Children become isolated and emotionally drained and in some cases rebellious. It is our responsibility at this point to notice the changes and even more so, to question the changes. When do we act? Should we be as silent as the victims? Speak out because they can’t!
Importantly, it has often been stated that most times the abusers are the ones closest to the victims: the fathers, the brothers, the uncles, the friends. Some years ago, I recall one child stating that she does not want to be the reason that her family falls apart. Therefore, it is evident that the pain becomes a burden to carry. The inability to speak out against abuse converts into the inability to be a child. In a famous Dominican calypso, we have been called on to ‘Let children be children.’ Personally, I have never been a victim of abuse and I have been fortunate enough to be raised by family and friends who shower me with love. It is because of this that I have chosen to write. I strongly believe that every child, no matter the age, should be recipients of unwavering love, care and strict guidance.
Notably, I have been seriously intrigued by the fact that persons would blame the victims and not the abusers. This is because of the length of time taken by the victims to speak out or in some cases ‘they do not believe that they behave like children anyway’. Do we know what we are doing when we make such crude comments? We are definitely silencing other victims whose greatest desire is to speak out. We are silencing the victims who are afraid of being judged by other members of society. Lucky Dube, the famous reggae artist has clearly stated, ‘If you can’t say something good about somebody, oh shut up’. As a nation, we are to be positive and always advocating for what is just. As adults, we are to lead from the front, knowing that the things that we say could affect someone longing to be rescued from the bondage of child abuse.
Then, there’s the big topic; the age of consent. I am sure that we have all heard someone say, “But they liked it.” As an individual passionate about law, I will advise that it does not matter whether a child liked it or not. As long as a child is under the age of consent stipulated by law, that child cannot give consent. Do you believe that a three year old child could consent to sexual intercourse when she does not even know the nature of the act? Laws are put in place to govern our society and these laws should be put into action as long as there is a breach of a provision.
This is not an essay submitted for a competition or a work of art. This is a call for us to speak for the victims who have been silenced. We can only see changes when we work on the problems plaguing our society.
This is my contribution. A youth with a vision.
Today we only care about child abuse when the abuser is a common citizen. None of the relevant laws to protect children will not be passed because the people in position to champion and drive these legislative reform are child abuses and predators. The narrative, the approach and the change will come when this power has been shifted.
Before this commentary slips off the front page I want to encourage Aymah George to continue to eloquently speak out on this and other issues. Dominica desperately needs youths with vision.
Some of us Dominicans too damn hypocrite. Going around pretending everything is ok and we know the facts about the men in our lives. #STOPCHILDABUSE.
I am sincerely appalled at the response to child sexual abuse. In fact, Facebook brought me to DNO. Many of the participants in this discussion blamed the victim. “She enjoyed it” among one of the more depraved statements. Instead of waiting for Government action, the citizens of Dominica – right thinking men and women should confront this issue head on. Ask the questions and publically shame the perpetrators. Educate the citizens. Provide emotional support to the victims, assist the child regain their childhood and help prevent promiscuity. Many times the victims and their mothers are financially dependent on the rapist, so she does nothing. Mothers, it is your responsibility as a parent, PROTECT & BELIEVE your child, ALWAYS, regardless of the consequences. Schools and churches should Rise Up about inappropriate adult/child sexual behavior. Every adult should ask the question.
I am 62 yrs. old. At doctor visits (USA) I’m asked, “Are you safe in your home?” Please ask the…
The leaders in our midst have decided this is not an important matter. Neither is the matter of sexual or any other kind of abuse in any place, especially in the workplace. Since they are the ones making the decisions that are enforced it is up to John Public to let them know this matters to us the people, by any means necessary.
Many of those who are known to practice these deeds are in high public and private offices and positions, when they should not be, with the blessings and praises of their counterparts. This must not be allowed to continue.
I Know some will say that we should put politics aside as we respond to this article. But that is not possible just as it is impossible to say we must put religion aside when interpreting the Bible. The question here is, should we remain silent? Well, my answer is does what we say matter? Twenty years ago what we said mattered. Of late what really matters is what pm Skerrit says, whether what he says is against our constitution or not. For example, PM Skerrit answered the question asked in the article above long time when one of his Ministers resigned. I will not say who resigned and why they resigned because DNO doesn’t like that. But when dealing with that matter pm Skerrit said the man has grown 10ft taller and the man is a hero and asked supporters for a big win in the buy election, in honor of the PM’s hero and that he got. So does it matter what I say when the pm says the man is a hero? What we are dealing with today is as a result of our own dog biting us. Hope u got it
I am in total agreement with the writer. Silence is not an option. Martin Luther King’s words are so true.: “There comes a time when silence is betrayal. Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter. In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.” I have had heated discussions with people who blame the abused child and not the abuser. I cannot understand that thinking. Maybe we need to follow some cultures & give a hundred lashes followed by stoning to death in public. We must punish the abusers in the harshest way. Reports indicate that after Hurricane Maria, abuse by relatives of children who have been displaced (pun intended) has increased. What is wrong with fathers, brothers, sons, men who abuse?? YES! This evil sickness MUST STOP! We say it takes a village to raise a child, but we need to be careful. Can they be trusted? For decades trusted “villagers” abused children in their care. Beware! Speak…
It is the parent responsibility to protect their children, and speak to boys as well as girls let them know what is right and when its wrong! If you go from village to village and randomly asked young girls between the age of 9 to 13yrs old if some family or friend forced them to have sex you would be surprised to know how many will tell you their own father, grandfather, uncle, brothers, sisters, stepfathers ,and neighbor sexually molested them. Thanks god I was not ,but I know young girls that was ,and when they told their mom they did not believe them. There should be laws in place to protect this young people also a place to shelter them and protect them from their abusers. Not only their reputation can be shattered but their self esteem also. The abusers should be held accountable for their actions, and be on the child the child molester list to prohibit them from doing it again!
The punishment for people who sexually abuse children in Dominica is too light.
The punishment given to child-rapists in Dominica is too light.
@ why aka??????? I understood the article and my response was based on the article. My comment was not political but rather FACTUAL. NO I do not listen to or take advise from Skerrit so I will not jump of a cliff if he tells me to. However some in his base will and when Skerrit speaks he addresses his base so they could be inspired by him. No one in Da is as powerful as Prime Minister Roosevelt Skerrit. if Skerrit says he does not want an officer in a certain police station the commissioner removes him. If Skerrit says to go arrest Linton, Thompson, Joshua and others, they will be arrested. If Skerrit says to go search the house of Linton the police will be by Linton before sun is out. Talking about these things is not being political; they are factual. Remember Skerrit was addressing his base when he called the man a “HERO” that grew 6 feet tall. Who was that man he was referring to again? Was the man arrested and charged? What for again? Keep defending him at the expense of DA
I commend Aymah George on her eloquent and passionate plea for protecting a child from sexual abuse.
From intimate knowledge of many cases, both regionally and elsewhere, I have also found that, more often than not, the abuser is either a family member or someone perceived as a friend of the family. Hence, it is kept within the family. Moreover, under these circumstances, the child’s account, if she or he is brave enough to speak up, is cast into doubt.
I stress “he” for boys are also victims.
No we sure should not be silent neither should the victim and family members be silent. But let’s be real Dominicans; is there anything we can do or say when the Prime Minister is on record calling people hero and saying they have grown 6′ , when he knew a very serious question was raised? I was even surprised PM did not bestow the highest national award on his Hero, during the independence and I would be very surprised if the PM’s hero does not run for public office, come next election and even become Acting Prime Minister. The PRIME MINISTER sure wasn’t silent
i dont know should the victims remain silent? Should people who get robbed stay silent? should the families of murdered persons stay silent? obviously not.
Child abuse? Child abuse is NOT a crime in Dominica. PM Skerrit referred to child abusers as “HERO” and soon we might see a hero running for public office again. So if the person that holds top office refers to that as hero, why should others not be seen as heroes to?
In other words, if Skerrit tells you to jump off a cliff, you’re going to do it?
The article speaks of your responsibility as a citizen concerning statutory rape… there’s no need to get political.
when and where did Dominica’s PM make that statement?
If I have to give my opinon/views it will take the whole page as being one (molested) myself..
Go ahead Summer, share it, get it out, we will read and support how best we can. Let us know of your pain and how you feel now. Despite this pain you need to rise high above this, although difficult forget. The one who will be worried for life is the perpetrator, the one who abuse you, violated your privacy. Be strong, get educated, be focus and be prayerful. We will have you in our hearts, prayers and strength. Embrace your families and love ones, that is trusted and close family members and friends., and your church Pastor or Priest.
Gods Rich blessings and guidance.