DEAR BELLA: I am 21 and pregnant for my 58-year-old boss

Dear BellaDear Bella,

I am three months pregnant with my Boss’s baby. I’m 21 years and he is 58 but age is just a number. He is a prominent businessman in the north.

It started as a fling which I did enjoy because he gives me everything and he makes me happy. Now that I’m pregnant I think I want a relationship.

I see him daily at work and it’s normal. I don’t think anyone at work suspects anything. I love my job and I love him too.

I want him to leave his wife because she can’t make him happy as I can. I think my baby and I will make him happier. She can’t conceive and she doesn’t want to adopt either.

His wife (well ex-wife to be I hope) is ruining everything for me by just being alive

She has the ring but I want that man.

It could be a secret baby but he doesn’t want people to know about us or the baby.

He actually gave me money to get rid of the baby because he doesn’t want to lose his wife.

And he doesn’t want to break her heart. I want that baby. I already love that baby. There’s no way I’m getting rid of our baby.

What do you think I should do?

Lil Boss Mummy

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Dear Lil Boss Mummy,

You need to first come down from the cloud that’s keeping you from facing the reality of your situation. I honestly don’t think you understand all that you’ve just said.

First red flag, “he doesn’t want people to know about us or the baby”

The second, “he actually gave me money to get rid of the baby because he doesn’t want to lose his wife”.

Now, clearly, this man has absolutely no interest in you. Well, I shouldn’t say that. His interest in you was obviously sexual because now that you are pregnant with his child, he wants no attachment to you.

I reckon he wanted a secret rendezvous with you without any attachments.

Deciding to keep your child is your choice and he shouldn’t run away from his responsibility because you didn’t get pregnant alone.

You should, however, tell him that you have decided to keep the baby. Don’t expect him to be happy with that.

You might also have to come to terms with the fact that you might have to raise this baby on your own. Meaning he might be there financially and that’s about it.

The reason I am saying this is because I have seen situations like that play out. He might also deny the baby is his, especially if he doesn’t want to lose his wife.

“His wife (well ex-wife to be I hope) is ruining everything for me by just being alive”…That statement is so brazen and sinister that I am worried about your mental state.

Perhaps you can also use the time to get some psychiatric evaluation.

Best

Bella

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32 Comments

  1. Dixie Normous
    November 12, 2018

    Lil boss Mummy, is delusional and naïve and yes very young, but why lay the blame solely on her young
    shoulders? What happen to the big hard back 58 year old married man who made a commitment to his wife? Please remember he is also her boss, he practically used his position to get into her panties. I guess that makes him innocent and vulnerable This crap has been going on for donkey years, in not only Dominica but a lot of places, so let’s stop being hypocritical and judgmental, yes that was pretty reckless of her. From reading her letter, she obviously has a lot to learn and a lot of growing up to do. He took advantage of her youth and naivity. Stop putting all the blame on the young girl. I’m not seeing anything where anyone is reprimanding the man for his part in this dilemma, unless she forcefully tied and raped him. Of course she thinks she is in love with him, we don’t know what lies he told her about the wife. I wont call him a dog since dogs are very loyal!!!…

  2. November 5, 2018

    I am all the way New York City, i look forward reading Bella. :-D :-D :-D,Girl get a life.

  3. Splendid
    November 1, 2018

    In the north u say where dat Nagiico mAn? :-D all clues pointing there hmmmn

  4. Fran
    October 31, 2018

    Stueps man. If that is true, why even go asking questions. The man has to send you his clearly plain message about you and the child in neon lights? He doesn’t want you or the kid. You want the baby have your baby, raise your baby and gain some self respect and pass it on to your child.

  5. WIFE
    October 30, 2018

    Little girl what is wrong with you? Why do you think your boss will leave his wife for you? What makes you thinks she’s not satisfying him? He’s 58 years old why does he needs a baby or better yet two babies? My advice to the wife—do not divorce your husband. Let the children wait. Little girl go and learn how to respect yourself. Boss man you’re a lucky man, if I was your wife I would bit the doo doo 💩 out of you. I don’t believe in domestic violence. I believe in respect. Don’t disrespect your wife with those little GNATS.

  6. How long will
    October 30, 2018

    “His wife (well ex-wife to be I hope) is ruining everything for me by just being alive”…That statement is so brazen and sinister that I am worried about your mental state.
    Perhaps you can also use the time to get some psychiatric evaluation. R U planning to get her out of the way?
    Doctor Benjie?? Oh no!
    There is a joke about a little guy whose mom had him leave the house to play bc she had a sex date. She asked him to go look for their family donkey which was galloping in the forest. Instead he hide under the bed lol.he mom in her sex high “said mon en Ciel joseph” The little boy butted in Mama whilst U R in the sky see if U can locate the donkey”

  7. Poor baby
    October 30, 2018

    Who writes these stories. What is bellas address, I need to Tell her my story.

    ADMIN: Email Bella at news@dominicanewsonline.com

  8. Secret Bae by Secret Bay
    October 29, 2018

    Ah boy! Well, one more disgruntled “revenge-seeking” baby mama to the long list in the north… one more cheating man, one more hurting wife/ committed partner, one more zenfan kwaydi caught up in the cycle of saloptay that is rampant across Dominica.

  9. Forever 21
    October 29, 2018

    Go to the home demand the wife to move out, and you move in.
    Keep the baby it may save your life someday.

  10. Maria
    October 29, 2018

    No one is telling this person to look for another job! He will fire her or she will hold him hostage! The outcome will not be good which ever turn this takes.
    Is she planning to kill the wife? Wow!!!

  11. DA Fails
    October 29, 2018

    Why women are such gold diggers tho? They always messing around with all kinda man for stuff, everybody kno what we does call dem kind of women in DA but I ain’t gone say it here :lol: :lol: Shame shame shame

    • Karl Orndem
      October 30, 2018

      we call them whores. A whore is someone who receives payment (cash or kind) in exchange for sex. The phone and all the “gifts” in exchange for passing it. Plain and simple. Loot up the term in the dictionary. it is there.

      • Karl Orndem
        October 30, 2018

        the people who dislike my comment most likely involved in those activities. either paying or getting paid. Fact is fact whether you like it or not. a whore is a whore. especially if she going behind men who are married. That is double blight.

  12. waypapa
    October 29, 2018

    Nobody asking how a 58 year old who doesnt want to leave his wife having unprotected sex with a 21 year old? He wants to leave the wife or her to leave him just not for you.

  13. Stroy
    October 29, 2018

    Think of what u write..his wife cant make kids? But he gave u money to get rid of the baby ? So tell me .what make u think his not happy with his childless wife? My girl you’re 21 and his 58 young lady this man could be yr grandfather .so my advice to you is leave this man alone and continue to work to take care of your unborn baby

  14. Jonathan Y St Jean
    October 29, 2018

    A gold digger par excellence. The saddest thing here is the baby will be hurt in all of this material chasing mess.

    • Karl Orndem
      October 29, 2018

      and a home wrecker. the woman is every bit as wrong as the man.

    • DA Fails
      October 29, 2018

      It have plenty woman like that up north, them woman will serve themself on a platter for phone, and ting. :lol:

    • Okay operative based in PA
      October 30, 2018

      Ok Johnny! from the misty woods of PA what’s ur financial advise having moved from Agri to banking?
      You should advise her how to plant her own food to feed the baby. An how to save the money she’ll begetting.

  15. jtt
    October 29, 2018

    hmmm my girl ur body the man using he doesn’t want u,and he is not leaving his wife want proof watch lifetime…

  16. Random Thoughts
    October 29, 2018

    Girl u too damn nasty… u know what u gettin…

  17. jamie
    October 29, 2018

    You need help,you will be crying after this child is born.

  18. Shabin
    October 29, 2018

    First of all you well wrong for going and love a man that has already committed his self to a woman infront of god. That the thing about women, when a man marry a woman that will alway be number one that is the person he made his first choice to marry in his life. All you going for man that have his woman, if he wanted to live de woman he would have done that already. If he doh want it why is he still going home to her. Money is the root of evil.

    • toucarie
      October 30, 2018

      correction;;; FOR the love of money IS the root of evil…we all want mon :-D :lol: ey

  19. Sweetness43
    October 29, 2018

    My advice to you is leave the people man alone , if he wanted to be with u or the baby he wud have never given u money to get raid of he/her, keep the money to buy wat u need for the baby when the time comes u never know war ur future might hold
    . The man doesn’t love I, u was only a fling to him and it’s obvious he will never leave his wife for u..

  20. As if
    October 29, 2018

    Girl bye.

    I have no pity for you, only the unborn child and the wife. You saw the man, you saw dollar signs; his wife cannot reproduce, so you figured if you could pop out one you’d get a steady pay cheque. Now you’re with child, it burning you he still wants his childless wife, he gave you money to get rid of if it, he wants you to keep it a secret blah blah blah blah

    “His wife (well ex-wife to be I hope) is ruining everything for me by just being alive” Listen psycho, do you know how sick you sound right now. Just now you’ll start flashing your belly infront the lady and throwing parables cuz you clearly unstable. You never mentioned he promised you he would leave his wife for you which I can conclude he never did, which means you were just a “beep’ to him . You offered he took. You spread your legs for the married man now suffer the consequences.

    I really don’t understand people, planned parent hood is there for a reason and they are cheap.

  21. Maybe
    October 29, 2018

    All I watch you as is selfish and greedy first of all you shouldn’t be sleeping with a married man if I was his wife and I get to no I would take him to the cleaners and make your life a leaving hell

  22. viewsexpressed
    October 29, 2018

    L`il, you have that choice to make – to abort at three months. You have been well advised by Bella, but its your choice to take the money and take care of yourself and run away from him to the closest education/school institution and go get educated, qualified and be a graduate to move on in life that one day you will have your husband and a family together. That is the plan, that’s your focus now. Goodbye to this 58 years old, this 21 year old Child has a great destiny ahead of her and it is she, only she, L`il can achieve this feat. Go for it, start a new life with yourself, for yourself. Sex is not gong away, it will be there waiting for you to enjoy, but you miss an education you are likely to be 58 one day without a job, a profession, qualified in a great field, nurse, doctor, teacher, social worker, lawyer administrator etc., all to enjoy with your family soon to come, but You must be prepared. It`s all there for you, Go for it. Keep us in touch. I`m on DNO. Bella will, also.

  23. viewsexpressed
    October 29, 2018

    Young girl, your writing tone tells me you may be immature and in denial of reality as Bella indicated to you. Tell me, what this mean? “I want him to leave his wife because she can’t make him happy as I can. I think my baby and I will make him happier?” Really, what about you? L`il, you better wake up and face reality now. Bella has given you some advice, which really is a wake up call. Your age and his age are not really compatible under these circumstances. You failed to protect yourself and your so called 58 year old lover has been negligent, only if he was desperate for a child that you just gave birth to. L`il, where are your parents/guardians, or mentors or role models. You have found yourself in a serious uncompromising situation that you need help to be able to manage this situation in the best way possible in the interest of this innocent child. My advice to you is find a job,be independent, embrace your family. You need to stay focus on yourself quickly, & grow up. Good…

  24. mine
    October 29, 2018

    You should close your, you knew he was a married and get pregnant to destroy his marriage. How do you know you will make him happy. You should never come to Bella after you had everything planned but I think your planning of he leaving his wife is wrong.

  25. Ferbrese
    October 29, 2018

    never throw your baby, there is a thing called condom, carpot.. most of all i do not like your words.. seems you got pregnant intentionally.. peace be unto you..

    • Iamanidiot
      October 29, 2018

      Generally speaking (not refereeing to this case) , it would be considered as “terminating an unwanted pregnancy”. Now not saying you should not be protected, but if you have 6 children and pregnant with a seventh or you’re 20-21, havent finished school yet and already pregnant, you would advise someone to continue with that pregnancy? Hope you bring a hand of fig for them and couple textbooks for them

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