Does size matter?

Dear Bella: This is a very awkward thing to talk about! I would say that I am a reasonably sexually experienced man, having had several girlfriends in the past. I would like to think that I took care of them in that department as well. But now I have found myself in a shaky position.

I am thinking of getting engaged to my current girlfriend. She is very loving and loyal to me and I am getting to an age where I feel like I need to settle down. The problem is that I don’t think I am big enough to satisfy her. When I met her she already had two children, one when she was only 16. She told me that she used to live a wild life when she was younger.

I asked her how many men she had slept with she said about 10 but I think she probably lied about the true number. Bella none of this really matters to me because she has changed and no one can change their past. But when we have sex I can see that I am not able to truly satisfy her. I am afraid that if we get married she will eventually cheat with a man who is more endowed.

I’m just confused right now.

Dear confused man,

Have you asked your girlfriend how concerned she is about the issue? Sometimes it may just be your insecure consciousness making you believe that you are not big enough for her. Nowadays, there are many steps offered for men who feel that they are too small. For one there are surgical procedures done to enlarge your size. However, if you find this is too risky and do not want to attempt this you can also consider the non-surgical methods. Where pharmaceuticals are concerned, I understand that there are no pills, creams, powders, or drops that will make a penis grow larger or longer. The emails offering these are scams and the advertisements are lies.

If you think these options are too much, it is encouraging to know too that there are also procedures women in your girlfriend’s situation can try like certain creams specifically  Harmony Cream, V Cream and others which can be found over the internet. She can also do various exercises which can help tighten her walls. Discuss it with her and I’m sure both of you can come to a solution. Good luck!

Bella.

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18 Comments

  1. dominican
    July 16, 2013

    you all talk alot of crap… what about the whore that have sex with more than ten men on a daily basis and still satisfy them?

  2. mints
    July 21, 2010

    wat d d***y cant do you beta put yo tongue in it an man if u kno how to wuk that tongue an make she crawle to d ceiln she wld step ah foot out so dont bother wit dem size dont matter tek it from a lady who know. the man dem way hv d anaconda tink dem hv it all but deep down inside dem kno them still hv to put d extra effort jus d same

  3. Pinky
    July 3, 2010

    Well yes Slim Jim you is the real deal lol .He needs to be creative in this particular situation.
    I feel you need your own column to deal with issues like this.

  4. Cookie
    June 29, 2010

    Slim Jim you have skills man …lol …lucky girl…you should get in touch with Confused and help a brother out

  5. Mr. Views
    June 29, 2010

    Bonjier…… Well Pardner Maybe Your penis That's Too “Small”

  6. HMMMMM
    June 29, 2010

    im LMAO so loud.look shots ….

  7. Soutman
    June 29, 2010

    Great ideas cookie, but positions alone do not matter if the guy is a 2 minute man. A woman will only be satisfied if she has an orgasm ( climax or point of highest excitement of sexual intercourse). The man always has his and he leaves the woman stranded along the way. She may fake satisfaction when, in fact, she's not satisfied.

    As Cookie mentioned, a good foreplay session will not only allow your penis to look it's best, but will also take your girl closer to an orgasm if not all the way. Ask her about the zones that excite her the most- tongue , tits, clit or G-spot. Work on yhem all. Size matters only when you can use it. To a woman, orgasm is all that matters. That's why some abandon their men for toys and other women. Women know how to make the juices flow while their men keep wondering why their girl left. Men are selfish. When we get ours, we tend to fall asleep, leavind our wives or girlfriends to gaze at the ceiling.

  8. Concerned Citizen
    June 28, 2010

    I expected a bit more though from Bella. Sex is very very very complex. There are millions of reasons why people get attracted to each other and millions of reasons why people leave. If we desire money, fame sex etc we will never be satisfied. Sexual arousal is the stimulation of the mind. What makes sex satisfying to couples is each individual giving their best to each other. Sex do not make a happy relationship, but a happy relationship results in satisfying sex. I think it would be nice that some of our readers here read some some of Sigmund Freud's work or Understanding Human Sexuality by Janet Shirbley Hyde or one of the works of Masters and Johnson. Sex is psychological, spiritual, emotional and last of all physical . Society glamorizes the physical aspect no wonder their are so many men suffering from erectile dysfunction. Classical conditioning plays a key role that is where fore play comes in. I would like to shake this man's hand who is at 50 able to sex for an hour. Its virtually impossible with so many issues involved in a relationship such as children, finances, tradegy. That is where love comes in the assurance that one will stand by each other through thick or thin. Then a couple will enjoy sex to the fullest……

  9. Win
    June 28, 2010

    Stop repeating nonsense that other people write. Size matters. As man, I am full of years and other things, but I am yet to find a woman looking for a little one. If you are economically well rendowed, of course she will tolerate your diminished protuberance; on the other hand, she will lie just to boost your self confidence. Don't fool yourself, her eyes is always on the prize.

  10. Mac Sylvester
    June 28, 2010

    Dear confused man, as a psychologist I can tell you its all in the mind, that ego thing, because your girlfriend told you she had other men before you, your ego is dented , satisfaction is not about size, its about emotional contentsand how much you in your self feels about this woman, . first did your girl tell you you were too small? Just get on with the job and stop thinking about her past, that your proplem, you dwelling on the past. think of what you and this woman have today and what you CAN have or loose tomorrow

  11. little guy, big world
    June 28, 2010

    your response to this is better than what Bella gave. Good luck to you Confused, listen to Cookie.

  12. sensible
    June 28, 2010

    the sad fact is the more you have sex, the more the size of your thing will decrease

  13. slim jim
    June 28, 2010

    man if the woman had a kid since she was 16 and been with alot of men as u say maybe she has streched a bit to much and it never close back to it proper size so u gotta be creative and tink of other ways to arouse her its not all about what effect u have when u go in u ever think of what u do before u go in not wanting to boast but i have made my girl cum even before i enter her and all it took was a feather rubbed up and down her tummy and around her boobs and being sweet gentle and talkign sweet to her so try being creative to her if u need idears buy a KARMA SUTRA it will give u loads of ideas man

  14. Cookie
    June 28, 2010

    Karkabeff…I have to wonder about some people eh boy…that is the best advice you have to give de man…
    Anyway to tell you the truth it might be all in your head….I said might eh….like Bella suggested simply ask your girl and tell her don’t worry about hurting your feelings you need the truth so you guys can work on it…try different positions…back shot or doggie style is always good for men in doubt or women who feel they might not be tight enough….If you are on top it’s better to keep her legs up and together rather than spread apart. The Snake is also good, put her to lay flat on her belly with her legs closed, for the sake of ease and comfort, put a pillow beneath her hips until her bottom pushes upward. Gently spread her thighs just enough to allow penetration and the rest you know; also If when excited she gets really wet then that too might give you the impression that things are moving in too easily so keep tissues close…There are many other positions Google them if you must you both can have fun exploring them. But always start with a good foreplay session…that will allow your penis to look it’s best if you catch my drift.

    Yes pelvic floor exercise can help it takes a lot of effort and time to really make a difference but can be done anywhere at any time even during sex…(my fella likes that) …it’s a really good exercise ladies for all ….not just those of us who are sexually active or have babies… but for women generally to keep our best friend in shape… Look it up ladies…nothing to lose….

    All the best Confused…Just work with what you have….

  15. Tee
    June 28, 2010

    I believe you are insecure about your size and you think that because she has had other men she can compare. Did the woman tell you your size is too small? Maybe you are not pushing the right button. Why don't you ask how best to satisfy her? Some men like to think a big one is going to do the job so they just “get on and off” then expect the woman to be all happy and satisfied…. You need to love up your woman real good in other ways…….talk to her and you will find out it is not your size that is the problem.

  16. sex addict
    June 28, 2010

    well sir i am here ,being a woman in a position to answer u
    my man is not big himself and he is satisfying me with wat he have and using his order things that god bless him with ,and as drlove say size or penetration dont even mater,sometimes i thin of pass sizes but when i remember its not the size or the job it can do is the person carrying it i am well served.
    if she loves u then she will be satisfied,and who say small is not satisfying? just use it right. matea her well,,,,,,lol

  17. Karkabeff
    June 28, 2010

    If when you all doing the hanky pankie she start a conversation about going to church or to jump up in carnival then you are doomed. Sometimes when you think she moaning is laugh she laughing so you already in trouble. If it smell like rat, walk like a rat and squeak like a rat then it is a damn rat. What else you want Bella to tell you? Go get a taytar in the river a rub your ting so it will grow with the taytar. All you will need next is the little blue pill for stiffness and voila…..your problems are over.

  18. Drlove
    June 28, 2010

    my brother you need to ak you woman if she feel satisfy after sex and see the reaction and expression about the answer and just caus u a not big to satisfy her by penetration you can in many other ways and the penetration part may not even come in the game trust me you can is just a pitty i cannot give you the help u need on that public page so think about it

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