I keep on falling for younger women

Dear BellaI hope you will be able to publish my letter so I can hear what others have to say.

I know it is going to be harsh but I am willing to hear what the public has to say so I can help myself.

I am married to a wonderful woman. We have been together for many years and now we have kids together. I love her yes but my eyes still wander.

I have been with other girls younger than me, the first time I say it will not happen again then there was a second and a third time.

She has forgiven me but I think she is really tired and is watching every step I take.

I have been good for the past year now, it is hard but do love her and my kids to death, but every time I see a younger woman I fall.

My wife is not ugly, she is very pretty and has a good body. I know what most of you are saying but I am trying, I have been to a priest and pastor but it does not go away.

No we have not been to a marriage counselor yet, I think that is a waste of time, they  have their problems too. I’ve been to church and pray. I do pray that God will give me strength but I think she is so fed up with me because she doesn’t not want to pray with me or go to church with me no more.

What do you think I do, what can I do to stop it. I want to, I am trying, and as I am writing this letter I have been good for a year now, Which I am trying my best so she does not leave me. I do think of leaving so she can be happy but what about our kids? I do not want to leave them.

HELP

—————————————————————————————————————————————-

Dear HELP,

It appears you are going through a collosal struggle based on lust.

Let me say that lustful thoughts are completely normal, it’s what you do with these thoughts that will determine any consequences after. You say that the woman you are married to is a wonderful woman. I’m sure this wonderful woman has had thoughts on other men, but has she acted on them? Probably not.

This sounds a lot more serious than just simple thoughts though. You are coming across as if you are having difficulties in controlling your thoughts and desires. You need to ask yourself why is it so difficult to control them.

I encourage you to work on your self control. You said you have been “good” for a year, keep it up. Do things that will make life exciting at home, including spicing up your sex life.

You said you love your wife and kids to death, so don’t do anything that will make you lose them, probably over someone you don’t even know.

Bella

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120 Comments

  1. air head
    February 21, 2014

    ok, a woman married to another woman goes to priest and pastor for help????????? first of all i really think SHE READS HER BIBLE because she would see the part where it’s called an ABOMINATION!

  2. March 20, 2013

    The history of Islam is well known in regard to its injustice towards women: Keeping the girls back from getting an education. Preventing the young women from entering the professions. Not allowing a woman to walk to the store or market unless she is accompanied by a male relative. Female circumcision. Honor killings. Then there is the hate that moves Muslims to kill Muslims: one Islamic sect literally at war with another Islamic sect and murdering one another. The killing of Christian missionaries or anybody who would convert Muslims to Christ and the murder of former Muslims who have converted to Christianity. The way Muslims take revenge on anybody who speaks a word against their “prophet” by making death threats or worse still – actually taking out a contract on their lives! The absolutely inhuman treatment of women by Muslim dictators and soldiers. The sons of an infamous dictator (now dead) would snatch women off the street, take them into “rape rooms” and rape them. Muslim soldiers would invade a village and rape the women in the streets and in their homes. They burn down Christian churches and homes. (This is happening as I write.) It is all bewcause these people don’t know the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob: the God and Father of our Lord Jsus Christ. He is the God of LOVE. “For God so LOVED the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” Christ taught us to love even our enemies. He said “Love those who persecute you. Do good to them that hate you, and despitefully use you. If your enemy is hungry give him something to eat. If he is thirsty give him something to drink. This is why we cannot understand Islam. And because human beings everywhere respond to love this is why the good news of Jesus Christ is spreading, and receiving such acceptance in Muslim lands. Sincerely, Rev. Donald Hill. Pentecostal Evangelist. I invite you to visit my website http://www.livinghopeministries.ca Click onto ARTICLES. Then click onto – and read – my article THINGS THAT CANNOT BE SHAKEN.

  3. *Woman of Virtue*
    July 6, 2012

    “I love her yes but my eyes still wander”…….. “It is hard but do love her and my kids to death, but every time I see a younger woman I fall”…..I honestly believe that if “women” is your weakest point n you can’t control your feeling towards them (vice versa) then marriage is not for you…..most people take marriage for a joke, when it is a covenant to God…[email protected], u mentioned lustful thoughts as being normal hmm did u know it is also a sin to lust after someone…Matthew 5:28 “But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart”….I suggest you get some help “Mr. Help” the most the pastor or priest can do is pray for you, take it to God in prayer, remember nothing is impossible to God….if you don’t stop it you’re gonna lose your wife, there’s a certain amount a woman can take…

  4. Robert
    July 3, 2012

    Has he ever heard of Tiger Woods–and the price he paid for “eating out?”

  5. Setup
    June 30, 2012

    Plus or muslim whoever you are. You said “a man can ejaculate in how many women and each child would know their father and mother”

    Well kind sir the child always knows who their mother is for sure, but the man is never really sure if the child is his unless he takes a paternity test. When a woman goes to get comfort in the arms of another man, he man wants to kill everybody including himself. But as you say muslim, you can sow your oats every whiich way, and it is nothing for you and some others.

    A woman only carries a child if she wants to, not because a man put a child there. Get real, it modern times. There are married women whom I know have aborted children for their husband because he was unfaithful. Don’t ask how many single women abort babies. So while you think you are sowwing your royal oats. Not all the seeds will grow. (I do not believe in abortion, because it is murder) I am just stating a point.

    If you want to practice your muslim life, you can go and live in Iraq or Iran,or one of those countries where it fits your lifestyle.

    You say that muslim have the lowest amount of HIV, but how do you know that for a fact. Everyday there are suicide bombers killing themselves and others. The first thing you hear on international news is A suicide bomber targeting ….. has killed …. people and wounded …… others. This is how the people whom you support lives everyday, ao they don,t have time to take a blood test, they are always being killed, by some brainwashed youth.

    This is not our law in Dominica. So either you marrry one wonam and be faithfu, or remain single and live your life as you want. Do not make a woman unhappy with that kind of lifestyle.

  6. Dominican in England
    June 28, 2012

    Mid life crises!!

    You better fix up soon, before you lose her and the kids. you might not find the younger ladies willing to look after you when your sick or as you get older.

  7. June 28, 2012

    dear bella with all due respect your advise most times seem to be on the surface. anybody with an education in basic psychology will see that this man has a serious psychological problem because it seems like he is really trying. if i were u i would strongly recommend psychological help and professional councelling. also if he is truly remorsefullband repentant God will help him if he asks for it and seek Gods mercy with faith. may god bless all of us

  8. met
    June 27, 2012

    make sure the younger man under you when you fall he can catch you

  9. bugs bunny
    June 27, 2012

    wats up docccc! man u just trying to make an excuse for ur stinking habit. If ur wife is all that then there would be no reason to go outside. I think u need to improve your communication level with your wife.

  10. Viable Solution
    June 27, 2012

    Watch Porn!!! Jock it out of your system. Jock before you leave the house, it will help you control your urges. It helps me :wink:

  11. Caribbean Lady
    June 27, 2012

    A few observations:
    1) This man needs to continue to work hard on control. He may always have urges but we have urges to do all kinds of things every day that we do not give in to. We don’t shoot the idiot who pulled out on us in traffic or cuss our boss. Well, most of us. :lol: We practise restraint in many areas of our life but when it comes to lust and love pretend we are helpless. We are not. Just as we restrain ourselves many times every day from doing destructive things, we must do the same.

    2) He should perhaps give himself a ‘focus object’ to keep reminding him of what he stands to lose. Since he does seem to genuinely love his family and his children, maybe keep a photo of his kids in his wallet – every time he feels ‘the urge’, pull it out and look at it for a bit.

    3) Despite saying he does not believe in marriage counselors, he could probably use a good professionally trained counselor because he may have a sex addiction. At the least, he should read up on sex addiction to see if he shows the traits and join an online group for it.

  12. Rudeboy
    June 27, 2012

    Look pon de life we living and see if its worth it or we just wasting it.

  13. AC
    June 27, 2012

    This is a amazingly great book that talks about our emotional layers.. and how to get integrated with ourselves to lead conflict free lives. It saved my life from similar conflicts and did so for many friends whom I recommended the book to.

    http://www.amazon.com/Guaranteed-Solutions-ebook/dp/B004W4M5FI

    available to read online for free at:
    https://lifeblissprograms.org/e-books/flip-books/new-books/GuaranteedSolutions/index.html#/cover

    Read the chapter on fantasies titled “Transforming Lust to Love”

  14. Justice and Truth
    June 27, 2012

    I will not doubt that it is a man who has this problem unless I can prove otherwise. Men do get tempted and in a bad way. So why doubt it? We should be offering concrete advice and not make foolish and useless statements. It is an ill-wind that blows nobody any good.
    He has a good wife and falls for younger women. This is nothing surprising. Why should it surprise others? Many men fall for younger women and even marry them.
    You are married, want to remain married and are trying. Please keep trying! You have a family, children and you should not forsake them for outside flings with younger women. The grass is not always greener on the other side. You know what you have but you do not know what you will get in future. The saying, “A bird in the hand is worth more than two in the bush.”
    We have an enemy and his name is Satan. He is out to destroy and divide. He is an evil influence. Keep this in mind. Do not let the enemy influence you and take away what you have, a good wife and family.
    You do need the blessing and grace of God. Going to a Priest and Pastor will help you, if you are willing to listen to their godly advice and change.
    You should see a family counsellor. If you do, both your wife and yourself should go or for the initial visit you could go alone and the second visit go with your wife. Both of you will need to discuss with the counsellor what is transpiring in your life as husband and wife so that he/she could help you.
    Both of you must go to church together. I hope you are of the same faith. A family that prays together, stays together.
    When you pray to God to help you, you must be willing to change. It is a struggle but as you said you have been good for a year. Keep on being good and you will note that as time goes by you have changed altogether. It takes time. You will be happier for it. I urge you to pray and keep on praying, unceasingly.
    If you are a Catholic, pray the Holy Rosary and attend Holy Mass. Get Holy Water and bless your home, yourself, your wife and family. It helps.
    Whenever you see young girls, say The Our Father…And lead us not into temptation…” This means, ask Him to help you that you are not led into temptation and succumb to it. Prayers conquer all. Hope this helps. I wish you well. God bless!

    • UDOHREADYET
      June 27, 2012

      Most people must realize that Satan is not an outside force it is within us. We are the ones that subconsciously bring the behavior to light and fight with ourselves to subdue them. The Satan, devil, temptation, whatever you want to call it is you (not literally). Priests and pastors may remind you of what you already know but only you can change yourself whenever you are closest to achieving your goal that’s when you get tempted to stop or stray , that temptation is from within it’s what you bring to light or focus on. We are made in likeness of God and when you pray you are indeed speaking to your inner self. Once you have control over your conscious and subconscious behavior you’ll be free to make the right choices.

      • May 16, 2013

        Satan is indeed an ouside force. He is not something within us unless of course you have become demon possessed. What is in us is the Adamic nature we inherited from Adam and Eve. Because they sinned this is a fallen sinful nature with tendancies to sin. Satan tempts us from the outside. He tempted Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden from outside of themselves. He tempted Christ in the wilderness from outside of Himself. The difference is when he tempts us now we have within us the fallen nature that is prone to sin and which too often responds to the outside temptation. This was not originally the case with Adam and Eve. It was certainly not the case with Christ. When we yield to temptation the part of our Adamic nature that is prone to commit that particular sin becomes stronger and it is more difficult to resist the next time. In fact we may find we don`t need any outside prompting. However, certain types of behavour such as alcohol and drug abuse, pornography, involvement in occult activities, and homosexual practices are dangerous. When people do these things again and again they open themselves to satan and create a potential for demon possession. Then the individuals begin to identify with the sin to the extent that they think they were born that way or it is who they are. This is because the demon has entrenched himself in – and entwinded himself with – the human psych and it is (seemingly) impossible to separate the two. At this point medication, psychotherapy, and 12 step programs often do not help. The person may need the help of a genuine deliverance ministry followed up by qualified Christian counselling. This should be done in the context of a Bible believing evangelical church under the oversight of a pastor – not by a free-lance exorcist who operates outside the church and is accountable to nobody. To stay free the person should receive Jesus Christ as his or her personal Saviour. It is also important to attend faithfully a church that sings about and preaches the wonder working power of the blood of Jesus, and follow the preaching of a godly pastor or pastors. Sincerely, Rev. Donald Hill. Pentecostal Evangelist.

  15. UDOHREADYET
    June 27, 2012

    You’re putting too much of your time and energy on physical pleasure. We all have vices good and bad but unbeknownst to us there are certain things we do and expose ourselves to that trigger such behavior. It could stem from excess alcohol, marijuana, lack of confidence, need for validation, watching too much porn, putting ourselves in the wrong environment, seeking attention or reading too much x rated material. Three things: Do not become a school teacher lol; take a close look at yourself to find the source that triggers your behavior; try self-pleasure using the fantasies that work for you outside your marriage or involve your husband/wife in those fantasies (role play). Good luck and God bless.

  16. justice
    June 27, 2012

    man u say ur wife has a good body n is pretty,tell me is she not doin wat d others doin?just let a boy pass by her n wen u hear dat u will ask ur self a question

  17. June 26, 2012

    “No, we have not been to a marriage counselor yet, I think that is a waste, they have their problems too”. —News article

    To Help

    You have said it right on, above! Marriage counselors, preachers, and pastors are human beings like yourself they have no power to heal you, unless it is given to them by Holy Spirit. But then, only God, Himself can lead you to those certain persons.

    So what you need to do now is seek for the guidance of God Almighty through your own faith and the words of prayer that this faith in you will speak to God through your own mouth. But it all depends on if your truly want to get out of the calamity you are faced with right now.

    Bella is right, the problem with you is the lust or passion of the flesh which is provoked through your human sense of “see”

    In other words you see that younger woman and right away that human sense of yours tells you to lust after her body. That is a temptation from the devil your enemy and God’s enemy; as human beings he knows all our weakness and he wickedly use those weaknesses against us.

    What you need is the strength by which you command the devil to “get behind you”, instead of playing his wicked game in your mind, until you do it with your own body–that is they way you suffer the loss each time, as Satan leaves with the guilty conscience, and the fear that you could lose the wife, whom you claimed to love, in the process.

    You need now is a personal relationship with God Almighty by your faith in His Son, His Person of Love who is Jesus Christ. For faith is also patience in you–do not allow anyone to force you into doing things you do not understand.

    Jesus once told us: “Come to Me all of you who labor and are carrying heavy loads, I will give you rest” Through steadfast faith and your choice of obedience you will have the victory which you are searching for, which to overcome the passions of the flesh which you experience when you walk into a younger woman.

    But as I already said, you will only be a victor in Jesus Christ if you are sincerely searching for that victory through His guidance.

  18. Woodford Hill girl
    June 26, 2012

    What you need is not advice,you are a selfish…. if you loved your wife as you claim,when you see another woman you would not look at her so long that you can’t control yourself it’s inconcievable how someone could love a spouse so much and cheat on them,you spould have Lorena Bobit as your wife #that’s all I’m saying11

  19. June 26, 2012

    Man you are nothing but an old crate.

  20. (.) (.)
    June 26, 2012

    You claim to love your wife and kids so you better make the extra sacrifice for them…when you see those young girls just think of them as your little sister(s) and not as something to have sex with. You are a weak man and you need to pray more

  21. THINK MAN
    June 26, 2012

    You have been to a priest and a pastor but yet you dont want to go a MARRIAGE COUNSELOR and you think it is a wast of time they have there own problem to . when there could be the end of your problem . I think the problem is you . I dont think you want to change . If you wanted to change you would go the extra mile to have your family back together again . you said you have been good for a year so why cant you be good forever . I THINK YOUR WIFE SHOULD LIVE FOR A LITTLE WILE . YOU DONT NO WHAT YOU HAVEUNTILL YOU LOUSE IT

  22. NatureBoy
    June 26, 2012

    Try having a regular Bible study with Jehovah’s Witnesses. They are willing to make the time to assist you. That has helped many people the world over give up all types of dangerous and unclean bad habits.

    This is because studying the Bible draws you closer to God and his Son, and the love you build for them and for your neighbour (which includes your family,is the strongest motivating force to conquer a bad habit.

    You can conquer this for good. Read 1 John 5:3

    • Justice and Truth
      June 26, 2012

      @ Nature Boy

      Why Jehovah Witness? They are not better than the Priest or Pastor.

      • NatureBoy
        June 27, 2012

        My advice did not compare Jehovah’s Witnesses with Priests or Pastors. It offered well known facts – that Jehovah’s Witnesses DO help millions worldwide by means of regular Bible studies, to overcome deeply entrenched vices.

        But if you do want to compare them, Jehovah’s Witnesses as an organization has not been plagued with the scandals that have plagued priests and pastors of other religions.

        Besides, many Witnesses of Jehovah had once been priests or pastors with vices before becoming Witnesses, but have been helped to reform by studying the Bible and applying its teaching.

        These are indisputable facts, however you may feel about the Witnesses. Which other religion do you know that offers Bible based personal spiritual help on a weekly basis to individuals at their convenience, free of charge?

        The Witnesses can help the person if he accepts the help.

    • NatureBoy
      June 26, 2012

      Those of you who disliked this advice, no problem, but please try to offer a better one, and let’s compare them.

    • I Never
      June 28, 2012

      Are you trying to recruit members to your colt? Why Jehovah’s Wickedness?

  23. stoic
    June 26, 2012

    the bible said the adulterer and the adulteress shall be put to death…its a man’s world…so only the women pay….might makes right…the one who is physically stronger usually haves his way….

    women risk their lives back then to cheat on their husbands…uria’s wife did it….she went to bathe the roof so king David could see her…her husband was gone too long and she wanted her thing..and i’m sure a lot of men in the bible days fathered kids that were not theirs

    • stoic
      June 26, 2012

      there is no record in the bible of women having two wives because like i said… might makes rights…it’s a mans world…..women were supposed to act a certain way while men did as they pleased….but the have no idea what their wives did behind their backs while they were off to war or out in the pasture taking care of the sheep

      • stoic
        June 26, 2012

        so men learn to control yourself and don keep it in your pant if you if you want you wife to be faithful also…. if not…..and make your wife know how you feel about polygamous relationships before the marriage ..not after you’ve been married for 3 years

      • WHAT?
        June 27, 2012

        Please read the new testament (new covenant) about Jesus’ take on marriage before you bring up the Bible.

  24. Anonymous
    June 26, 2012

    You have money? It good for these young crazy materialistic girls out there to SHAY SHAY YOU DRY! and fire you after.!

  25. PastorP
    June 26, 2012

    I kno a patna that hav all d young women in his work. wife workin wit him and all preten christian all kwaib all white ting all local all of them he takin single and married. all of them young. and tout moun happy lololololol. so mister man have ur young ting and bathe in dem. just wear a hood.

  26. pinnez
    June 26, 2012

    you were not prepared or ready for mariage when you got married,period. i think that you really need help.

  27. Francis Chicago
    June 26, 2012

    You need deliverance your understanding can only be darkened when you are carried away by lust carnal thoughts and hollow imaginations.You must avoid them at all cost because they separate you from the good life of Christ.To win this fight you must let Bible knowledge sink down in to your heart so that you are moved to act upon it but you need to associate your self with God people.We should learn from David experience to be on guard against situations that excite improper sexual feelings.[Colossians]3;5]1Thessalonians 4-3-5]Ephesians 5-3-5.Do not put your self in a situation with another person that can lead to fornication.meditate on the word daily it will impart life, truth and grace for living into your soul.

  28. stoic
    June 26, 2012

    first people using the bible to justify child abuse now they using it to justify their sinful lifestyle…

    David had many women? well God tolerated it then….. in the past sisters and brothers had sex that ‘s how the earth got populated…..does any one recommend having sex with their sibling because it was done in the bible?

    when David died ……his servants put a young girl in bed with him(his corpse) to make sure he was dead. ….women lead to his downfall……sex and money are 2 big giant that humans need to fight

  29. mpi meme
    June 26, 2012

    Mr. J dat der man

  30. Straight wood
    June 26, 2012

    give the likkle girls dem the AIDS is that they looking for….

    • Smh
      June 26, 2012

      Dumb Statement…your reto!

    • Gaza
      June 26, 2012

      agreed they too nasty :mrgreen:

      • Justice and Truth
        June 26, 2012

        @ Straight wood and Gaza

        Be kind! Watch what you say. It could happen to you. Some people do get punished because of what they state. When last you went to a doctor for a test on AIDS/HIV? :twisted: :twisted:

    • Dominican to de bone
      June 27, 2012

      This is how some ignorant people think.Why would u say this? well maybe it will be ur daughter or your sister that will get it.you can’t make comments like this. There we have one person trying to get help, asking for advice and admitting he have a problem. And the next person have to agree with this dumb comment.

  31. Sukie...Sukie
    June 26, 2012

    haa haaa haaa… I have to laugh at all the comments that was made, I tell you, One thing Bella you gave a good Advice, i must say but the comments man they kill me… I myslef will not lie it has happened to me but boy oh boy, we really have hear what people have to respond too…
    I love this one…:-)

  32. Bull Crap
    June 26, 2012

    It is so obvious that this was written by a woman and not a man, maybe a woman whose man doing that and she trying to pretend to be him.

    man don’t write and talk like that. nice try lady

  33. bravo..
    June 26, 2012

    Well as the saying goes,”men think with their penis and not their mind” they go wherever their penis takes them..

    • Holiday Island Boy
      June 26, 2012

      A sort of GPS, Gal Propositioning System. :-P

  34. stupes
    June 26, 2012

    Stupes, written by some foolish woman who’s had several affairs with married men.

  35. StreetBiker
    June 26, 2012

    Big Man,learn to appreciate what you have before u lose it forever. Stop move like you’re some 21 year old,man have to know how to be mature when you get older. You don’t have a p problem,you have a disciple and contentment problem.If u don’t have disciple you don’t have much my boy.Learn to be content and ask God for guidance.You might want to rethink the counseling thing cause it seems like you may lose your wife boss.

  36. trudat
    June 26, 2012

    Man u got a sex spirit like myself….I am not married but…. ohh good lord… i can’t see a woman pass by withought feeling sorry for myself like i never had sex before….I ready see women and water ran down my face wee ..women i never even saw or spoke too before…It’s like i keep getting instant GWOPWELL just by looking at a woman and knowing i can’t have all and may never get a taste of her ..lol…and trust me im not hungry….Padna we just ill….it’s a sickness hahahaha

    • Woodher
      June 26, 2012

      written by a woman..smh

    • Original Eagle-Eye
      June 26, 2012

      You know that is borderline pyschotic behaviour-hypersexuality. You laugh but you better get a grip and seek help before you allow yourself to do something you will regret!

      • trudat
        June 26, 2012

        To do what i will regret ?….i don’t go after kids and i do have a lot of respect…..I always protect myself and others….I also know myself and how to control my huge appitite for women…I said WOMEN ..NOT CHILDREN …and ofcourse i do get women easily ..I don’t apply force nor do i rape or even think of it….I don’t really look at porn …I LOVE WOMEN THATS JUST IT. OKAY WHO EVER U ARE

    • Justice and Truth
      June 26, 2012

      @ Bull Crap

      You are indeed bull crap. Always negative. I had to laugh at your comments. How can you assume that it was not written by a man but by a woman? Oh please! Nonsense! :twisted: :twisted:

    • Justice and Truth
      June 26, 2012

      @ trudat

      You have a major problem which could classify you as also a pervert. You need to see a psychiatrist. This is the problem with people as you. Sex reigns in your life and not God. Many souls go to Hell for sins of the flesh. Most of all look to Our Lord Jesus Christ so that he can change you.

  37. just looking
    June 26, 2012

    priest and pastor………… u a crazy fella man…. you doe see what ”
    ” do

  38. Shameless
    June 26, 2012

    Partner it seems like you have a very large appetite and an out of control desire for conquering the finer beings in life. I cant blame you but if your wifey is as nice as you said then you are displaying the behavior of a male German Shepherd in extreme heat. Be careful, AIDS kills.

    • Anonymous
      June 26, 2012

      And how is that comment supposed to assist the man? Stupes. he may be a German Sheperd. I hope you’re not a pig.

      • stoic
        June 26, 2012

        he warned him about contracting aids from his lustful lyfestyle

    • Justice and Truth
      June 26, 2012

      @ Shamless

      Please do not make me laugh. Have you seen a German Shepherd dog in extreme heat? Do you have one? He asked for advice and not this type.

  39. Prophet
    June 26, 2012

    Sir, first of all I will not judge you, I will leave that to God. I work in the deliverance ministry, and the spirit of lust is one of the easiest ones to get out, if you really want it out. This spirit is tormenting your life and I would advise you to go on a three day fast and fight for your life. Don’t just cry to God about the problem. Address the demon, and in the name of JESUS cast it out. If it becomes strong, then ask the Holy Spirit to direct you to a true man of God. Going to any pastor/priest might make the situation worse because you don’t know who they really are behind closed doors. If you are not truly saved, then the spirit will keep coming back. Like I have said before, you cannot fight a spirit naturally, you have to fight spiritually. My team will be coming to DA soon if it is the will of God. Hope to be casting some spirits in JESUS NAME!

    • Original Eagle-Eye
      June 26, 2012

      Oh sexual urges is demonic now? You know sometimes you people need to set the bible down and rise with the times. This person has a condition called hypersexuality, what they need to do is to understand the triggers and urges and work at it. It can be any number of variables, getting it under control is the important thing because often times people with those tendencies find themselves either masturbating in public, touching or worst raping women to sastify their urges. They turn to pornography and other forms of pleasure. It is not so much about being drawn to women, but a huge sexual appetite.

      • Reader
        June 26, 2012

        Thank you for that comment … althought I’m sure it falls of deaf ears (or blind eyes).

        People, the same way many alcholics need AA to get better, many sex addicts need counseling/therapy and support to get better.

      • Prpophet
        June 27, 2012

        Again I am speaking from experience. Heard these demons speak from people before. Witnessed people addicted to porn come to Christ and addiction cured just like that. Anything that is contrary to the WORD is caused by a demon, point, blank, period. I did not expect natural minds to understand!

    • Francis Chicago
      June 26, 2012

      Prophet why can you give him your number so you all can pray togather.

    • Justice and Truth
      June 26, 2012

      @ prophet

      What type of prophet are you? Surely, not God’s prophet? Some prophet. It sounds like Satan’s prophet. :twisted:
      What do you mean that going to a Priest or Pastor will not help because he does not know who they are behind close doors. What does that make you. Such a stupid statement and poor advice which came straight from the Jaws of Hell. :twisted: Do we know who you are behind closed doors? I would not seek for or take advice from you.
      Priests and pastors have the expertise to give him advice and assist him to turn his life around if he is willing to do so. To you who lack godly spiritual enlightenment you will not comprehend it.

      • Prpophet
        June 27, 2012

        If you read my comment properly you would not have made such a statement. I told the man to ask the Holy Spirit to guide him to the right pastor not to just go to anyone who carries the title. I am speaking from experience, and I have seen what’s out there.

      • Rev. Donald Hilla
        March 8, 2013

        Sinful desires including sexual lust come from our own fallen nature. Each time we yield to temptation the stronger this fallen nature within us becomes. In the case of sexual lust people feed the fallen nature by what they listen to, read, or watch, and then wonder why it gains such a hold on them. But some sins including sexual immorality draw demons (evil spirits) and can open the mind to demonic influence that is difficult to break free from. The same is true of alcohol and drug abuse. When people are drunk or high on drugs they are not guarding their minds. In fact they are literally opening their souls to outside forces. It depends on where they are and who they are with if evil spirits are nearby. But demon possession can occur. As long as the temptation is only that which springs from our own human nature a psychologist or mental health counselor may be able to help. If the person has come into the grip of demonic forces (influence or possession) the right kind of pastor is the person to see. Find an evangelical church. Ask for a pastor who does counseling. Not all pastors have time for this kind of one to one ministry. But those who do often become very good at it. There is such a thing as a deliverance ministry. These are Christians, often (not always) pastors, who have a good knowledge of the demonic realm and are used by God to cast out demons. But once the individual is delivered he or she should become part of a Bible believing – gospel preaching – church and attend faithfully. These people need to be under the ministry of a godly pastor on a weekly basis. They need to be taught the Word of God. One word in closing. Not all who claim to be in a deliverance ministry are the real deal. In seeking out this kind of help make sure the person is a committed Christian. It should be somebody who is attached to an established congregation and is accountable. Ask where they go to church and who they answer to! Sincerely, Rev. Donald Hill. Pentecostal Evangelist. http://www.livinghopeministries.ca

    • Setup
      June 30, 2012

      How do you know who is really a true man of God? After all the Scriptures does say that no one is good. We are all working for our salvation. Jesus never Judged anybody. The only person who can judge us is Jehovah God. We hear over the news about religious leaders who were caught doing wrong acts. And they claimed to be men of God. How do we know that you are a true man of God. Scriptue says we must live faithfully until we die, but how many of us do? Everyday we commit sin, even things we never think of as sin.

      `The man needs help if you can offer him good advice, pleas do so, but don’t talk about true men of God, because this will start another discussion in this discussion. And names will begin to appear in this discussion. May Jehovah God bless this man, and may the light of Christ shine on him and may the Holy Spirit dwell in his heart, in Jesus Name.

  40. ketura
    June 26, 2012

    i guess that man is sick and he need help,that y the call them men

  41. stoic
    June 26, 2012

    its all about sex nothing but sex…..i don’t know why GOD mad sex so enjoyable for men…..all a man need to do is look at a woman an he gets turned on….

    what if it was the opposite …what if women were that way instead of men….would women rape as often as men?…..i guess they would need to have the strength too and god has also made men the physically stronger one

    • Pippirit
      June 26, 2012

      Who tell you all a man has to do is look at a woman and he gets turned on. You know how many women I see out there without a man? How come they have not turned one on yet?

      • stoic
        June 26, 2012

        do you know what turned on means?….it means sexually aroused…..not wanting a relationship…..

    • Delicious
      June 28, 2012

      @ Stoic – Just one clarification; Rape is not about Sex. Rape is about Power and Control.

  42. Anonymous
    June 26, 2012

    Listen….I know who you are….as this has been going on since you got married. We are best of friends and you need to stop this lying, manipulation… you need help, however you need to provide the full picture so you can get genuine help.

    You are a woman…writing to Bella and making everyone believe you are a man. I KNOW YOU ARE A WOMAN WRITING THIS….

    As for your problem, your husband has realize that you always fall for younger men and have given up on you all marriage. No amount of counseling will help you. If you want to leave…you will be surprise how quickly he will help you to pack your bags.
    As for the Children… THEY WILL SURVIVE … and grow up to be strong men and women. However I am a parent as well so let me advise you …Children always ask their mother and father “why you mommy..or why you and daddy divorce” Hope you are prepared to tell them the truth… because as your friend…you will be the one they see as who break the bond….

    • TUTUT
      June 26, 2012

      …and as the husband you couldn’t just tell her that in your house? Both of you have bio-polar issues! you are pretending to be a friend, she pretends to be a man. Why people so diabolical nah?

      • smdh
        June 26, 2012

        LOL LOL LOL LOL this is some crazy, funny, stupid if tht’s the case. People grow the heck up and learn communication skills. How can u be married and ineffective communicators. It’s not gonna work. No wonder u all are having problems bcuz u are unable to communicate ur sexual desireds to each other.

      • (.) (.)
        June 26, 2012

        Hmmmmmm….I’m confused

  43. Anonymous
    June 26, 2012

    i guess that man is sick and he need help ,but that y they call them men

  44. player
    June 26, 2012

    boy a whole year you gone soft on me be all the player you can be just don’t let the wife get to know again

  45. stoic
    June 26, 2012

    and married women has never seen other men that they want to sleep with too?

    its just that women are more secretive about it because women are treated different in society…

    if a marries woman openly says that she has feelings for another man and wonders whats its like to sleep with him…she will get a different reaction from both women and men than a man if he says the same

    i know i have been intimate with many men in my mind

    • stoic
      June 26, 2012

      the only difference is that a woman would tend to have sex with a man that she has feelings for where as a man don’t need to have feeling/(be in love with) for a woman to have sex with her…..

  46. DPM
    June 26, 2012

    I question whether or not you truly know the definition of “love.” If you loved your wife as you said, you would not put her through that pain. A woman can never regain total trust in any man who repeatedly cheats on her.

    • namich2008
      June 26, 2012

      @DPM

      I quote “A woman can never regain total trust in any man who repeatedly cheats on her.”

      I ask what if it is the woman who is doing all the cheating?

  47. Smh
    June 26, 2012

    My padner you not tryin…dont lie …

  48. good girl
    June 26, 2012

    my boy all u have to do is spent some alone time with your wife spend some romantic time together fall in love with her all over again if u turly love her like you say express it to her i think in time u will realise what you a looking for outside is right in your bedroom good luck.

    • June 28, 2012

      you did not read the man likes little girls!!!! Unless the wife can turn back the hands of time and become young again she will have problems with this psychosocially disturbed man. She is now too old for him, he only stays for the children

      He doesn’t want that soft breast and stretch mark stomach anymore! some women forget they need to keep the man interested after they have had children.

  49. June 26, 2012

    :lol:

  50. مسلم
    June 26, 2012

    The reality is my friend you are polygynous by nature. Majority of the Dominican public are ignorant as it relates to the differences in sexuality between men and women.

    You are “good” for a year now because you are living a lie. You are going against nature. God legislated polygyny, the permissibility of a man having plural wives.

    It is good that you have a wonderful woman and children whom you love to death. Why lie to your wife, sneak and cheat around? Be honest about your polgynous urges. Man up!

    I am speaking from experience, I am happily married as well. I’ve discussed with my wife the issue of polgyny. At first she kicked hells because women are naturally jealous as well as we come from a society that has taught us rubbish about man and woman. If this woman has any sense of reason she will understand that the nature of man and woman are different, they are equal yet different. Now, I am completely happy about my sexuality and there is no way I’m gonna stick with one wife. Why should faggots have rights yet men have no rights to practice what is their nature?

    It is better you stay married to your family and marry another young girl of your choice as long as you treat both with equity and justice with respect to time and wealth. I wish you the best.

    • Original Eagle-Eye
      June 26, 2012

      A man can have Plural wives, but a woman just turning her head and giving a smile to another man is a whore and should be put to death? How would you feel if your wife told you she wants another husband?

      • anon
        June 27, 2012

        a key that opens many locks is called a master key! a lock that is opened by many keys is useless! if my wife told me she wanted another husband then that means she does not love me cause that is not the nature of woman. she can have as many husbands as she want but i will not be one of them

    • Music
      June 26, 2012

      Ok so some men are polgyny as you say. You say you told your wife and she kicked hells. Now, what if your wife decided she wanted to be with other men and that she cannot help herself? Are you going to call her a whore? divorce her? Or are you going to be understanding? What we do not like for our selves we must not do to others. SMH

      • مسلم
        June 26, 2012

        Rubbish, the two are not the same. Could you name me one woman from scriptures who had 2 husbands?

      • ???
        June 26, 2012

        -This is directed to مسلم.

        Did the scriptures say to strap bombs to ur chest and blow up innocent people?

        Did the scripture say to run your own daughter over with a car, or bury her alive just because she decided to follow the north american culture?

        Did the scripture say to stone women to death just because they spoke to another man, even if it was strictly platonic?

        I’m tired of you guys using the scripture to validate your immoral actions.

        One thing I can say is good luck explaining those action to the creator. The 9 virgins you all so preoccupied with, you have a rude awakening waiting for you

      • مسلم
        June 27, 2012

        @ ??? = Where is the revelance to the question as it relates to the issue? Your bigotry simply knows no bounds.

        And that is a correct name for you (???) that is because you don’t even know what you are about.

    • namich2008
      June 26, 2012

      OK…what if this was a woman writing this….what would be your response….

      I am awaiting your response

      • Music
        June 26, 2012

        If it was a woman I would say the same thing. How would you feel if your husband had different women? Would you stay? Divorce? or be understadning? It is simple, ” Do unto others as we would like for ourselves” and if both Husband and Wife, find it healthy to have extramarital affairs, then they should not remain married, or if it was so from before they got married, they should not have in the first place. Marriage is suppose to be sacred, now for different reasons it is not. I am not condoning Divorce, but sleepign with other women (husband) or men (wife) please separate.

    • ???
      June 26, 2012

      I was going to react to that rubbish of a comment that you wrote, but then I saw your name and understood why you are so screwed in the head. It’s the same reason idiots strap bombs to their chest and blow up women and children. Do yourself and others a favour by keeping your worthless thoughts to yourself

      • مسلم
        June 27, 2012

        I am a dignified human being and I have the right to share my thoughts. Secondly, learn to stick to the issue, what does strapping bombs have to do with a man right here in your society committing adultery over and over again? Here he has an alternative and that is to marry these women if he can deal justly with them.

    • Wayway way
      June 26, 2012

      You need deliverance. This is not natural, it is a generational curse that you will pass on to your children if you do not address it now. I would go on , but you need to be saved first so this demon does not come back. My God, go on a fast sir and God will show you how disgusting you really are. When you see how God regards your disgusting lifestyle, you will fall on your knees…your poor wife, your poor children :(

      • Patience
        June 26, 2012

        Really?
        Why are you attacking the man so much?
        Read what he says and try understanding. If you are happy with one wife, thank the lord for that. But don’t go degrading someone because he thinks differently.
        Remember King David, King Solomon, would you call them demonized?
        Think before you write.

    • Sakwe Toneh
      June 26, 2012

      Ok, Mr. Polygynous, everyone’s libido is different. We were created a little higher than the animals, and, therefore have the will to choose. FYI: Women enjoy sex just as much as men and some of us can take it without being emotionally involved but we choose to do the right thing and control ourselves. Also, there are some cultures where women have more than one husband. Wastay la toujour.

      • مسلم
        June 27, 2012

        Polygyny is for those who can do justice to his wives. If the man has a libido issue then polygyny is not for him pure and simple. You seem to divert from the issue. This man in telling Bella about his sexual urges. Why lie to himself, Allah has sanctioned polgyny, this is an alternative way to address that issue instead of cheating on his wife, he should have a frank talk about that once he can do justice to the women he marries.

        Now you spoke about women, you’re not being rational. A woman having two husbands or more will complicate matters with the idea of who is the father of the child. How many women in Dominica don’t know who their children’s father are because of their promiscuous behavior. A man on the other hand, he can ejaculate in how many women and each child will know its mother and father.

    • PROF. WIKILEAKS
      June 26, 2012

      Why should faggots have rights yet men have no rights to practice what is their nature?

      That is the real kicker here….that made my day

      Comedy for real.

    • Music
      June 26, 2012

      I cannot name you any two women who had 2 husbands in the bible. But I speaking of TODAY. This thing called AIDS and other STD. Each person should stick to their one partner. SO no multiple wives or multiple husbands. We should abstain, condomize or be faithful. Its not easy but worth the try. If a man has multiple wives, and one contracts Aids, be it from a ear piercing ( not properly cleaned needle, or grave medical error) why should another wife contact it?

      • مسلم
        June 27, 2012

        How comes in Islamic societies have the lowest HIV rates in the world yet they practice polygyny? You are only speaking of desires. We follow what Allah has revealed to us. Why don’t you people look into your pastors etc who are busy practicing unlimited adultery?

    • UDOHREADYET
      June 27, 2012

      Most men cant satisfy 1 woman much less many, the plurality of marriage i muslim clture was not to satisfy his sexual need but to protect the women that he married. Most of which were widows of extended family members who at that time could not provide for themselves due to the restrictive nature of their ancient societies.

      On another note:Why is it that most women these days are adopting the bad behavior of men and claiming equals but yet they don’t adopt the behavior of gentlemen? To all women you are not a man just as a man is not a woman. Men are wired differently physically; genetically etc. it’s the behavior and physicality of a woman that attracts a man to her. When she behaves like a man that long term attraction turns into resentment or disgust not because hatred but the qualities that attract him to her are no longer there. So the resentment stems from not being able to love someone that he should love or be attracted to. A woman does a disservice to herself by adopting male behavior. If you’re not happy with the way your man is behaving and want to emulate his behavior as revenge it’s not his fault, you choose to be with the wrong man for most likely all the wrong reasons. Men and women are different period the end.

    • September 7, 2015

      Read Matthew 19:4-6.

      This is God’s model for marriage. It is one man with one woman.

      Early in human history men began to practice polygamy and continued for centuries. But it was not ever approved by God, and it never worked well. By New Testament times it was pretty well phased out. It was never practiced by the Christians.

      There are “religions” that allow polygamous “marriages”. Usually they do not treat the women well. Physical abuse is common. Many polygamous wives are happy to get out of such arrangements.

      There is no room in a marriage for a second “wife”. If either the husband or wife develops an emotional attachment to a third party the original sweetness of the marriage begins to disintegrate, and the bond that holds a couple together weakens until it is no more. This is something both should guard themselves against especially if one or both are working outside their home and in contact with other people.

      Sincerely, Rev. Donald Hill. Evangelist.

  51. lovely
    June 26, 2012

    leave her and go with those young gurls is that u want u properly lose feeling for your wife

  52. Woodher
    June 26, 2012

    they like the vibes … tebe they tebe

  53. High speed
    June 26, 2012

    a standing …….. don’t have conscience.

  54. CZA
    June 26, 2012

    WHAT YOU HAVE TO CHECK IS THEM LIL TINGS THESE DAYS CANNOT GIVE YOU WHAT YOUR WIFE HAS ALREADY GIVEN YOU

  55. Tiger
    June 26, 2012

    You must be a bus driver.

    • Saysay
      June 26, 2012

      I would like to know what’s the comment about bus drivers in Dominica? How do the relate to whatever is going on. I see that phrase alot.

    • bondieu
      June 26, 2012

      HAHA!!! WELL SAID!!! :lol: :lol: :lol:

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