I still got the ‘hots’ for my high school sweetheart

Dear Bella: I’m in a complicated situation where I’m in love with two guys. One is my boyfriend who is almost twice my age and my high school sweetheart who is about same age with me.

The problem is I’ve been with my boyfriend about six years now and I’ve tried to be faithful, but I’ve ended up going out with other guys which he has no idea about.

I love him so much, but I fear that if I tell him the truth of my unfaithfulness he would leave me without a blink of an eye. He has said he don’t believe in giving a woman a second chance, because she should know before she gets involved.

Now I have been in love with my high school sweetheart since six years ago. He is back in Dominica and won’t mind being with me only if I was single. I feel tie up to my throat.

I don’t want to hurt either one. I am in love with both of them. What should I do?

Tie up.

Dear Tie up,

You’ve already taken the decision to hurt your current boyfriend and I’m sure eventually he will find out. It’s true that temptation will come, but it is up to you to not deliberately put yourself in situations where you know you won’t be able to control your feelings. Not because the opportunity affords itself you should act on these feelings, because as you stated you love your boyfriend and you’re in a committed relationship. If he is not fooling around I must commend him for being exclusive to you.

You’re with this man for six years for crying out loud. Nowhere have you mentioned also that you are unhappy or that he is ill-treating you. I suggest if you want to continue the relationship with him you should come clean and clean up your act. Also if you know that you’ll start to quiver and bite your lips around your high school sweetheart I suggest you keep the relationship restrained to “hi” and “bye.”

Bella.

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26 Comments

  1. gullygod
    June 22, 2011

    My girl all I can say is I have my own issues almost like dat and I chosse to do the rite thing…all now so I starving from sex.but u not ner..girl make d rite choice yer,it maybe hard but in d end its worth it

  2. jookytom
    August 17, 2010

    girl you too sort.you eh love the man you love the sex…claiming you inlove with both..hmmmmmmmm well seeing that you in love with both tell your man the truth..even if he leaves you you will still be inlove right…you eh know what you want

  3. sad
    August 9, 2010

    not*

  4. sad
    August 9, 2010

    all of you who say she is a b…. shut up … i think she is comfortable with he bf but she loves her high school sweetheart .. girl u need to go with ur heart let them mongol stay in relationship cause they comfortable and they think its bad to leave cause ” HE DID SO MUCH FOR THEM ” crap …. love is a thrill and i love it and i will encourage anyone to go for it … them mook need to start living find love ppl love no comfort

  5. mints
    July 23, 2010

    u need to come clean with ur bf i kno he mite give u a hard time but if u are in love with him as u say u are u will fight 4 the relationship to work and as much as he is sayn he dont give 2nd chances he will eventually c that ur r srry and give in and as bella say keep high skool sweet heart a distance

  6. Anonymous
    July 17, 2010

    Alas! Those comments real tight. Best de girl keep her problems to herself.

  7. July 15, 2010

    GIRL IF YOU WAS MY SISTER I WOULD HAVE DISOWNED YOU,YOU JUST A LOW DOWN DIRTY SHAMELESS LITTLE BRAT WHO NEEDS DISCIPLIN. I HOPE YOUR MAN FINDS OUT LET YOU FEEL WHAT A GO PWEL IS AND AFTER YOUR HIGH SCHOOL SWEET ASS FINISH PLAYING GUITER WITH YOUR PUSSY HE LIVE YOU DRY. AND ON TOP OF THAT BRING HIS GIRL IN YOUR FACE SO YOU CAN PASS LIKE A REAL DOG.YOU SHAMELESS DIRTY SLIME I DOUDT U USING CONDOM YOUR LITTLE SALOP

  8. Pitty..
    July 15, 2010

    DARLIN!!! you are wrong in so many ways.. you should’ve never cheated on him.. learn to control ur rushin hormones and if it was you,! you would want your boyfriend to tell you wheither he cheated or not, Your with this guy for 6yrs and you still have feelings for ur HIGH SCHOOL sweetheart?? hmmm seems you just dont loose feeling for your “EX’s” at all… or you jus want to run you high life?? tell the boy so he can move on!!

  9. Pnuts
    July 15, 2010

    What can I say bout u? Let me think …..Hmmm. U sound like a clothe pin girl. If any man come to u and full your head with sweet talk (that is like squeezing the head of the clothe pin), your leg will open. What a shame it is to call u a young lady. Shame Shame Shame.

  10. HMMMM(1)psychic
    July 14, 2010

    You lie…you don’t love anyone. You are just a plain azzzzz cheater. Once a cheater will always be a cheater. If you loved your boyfriend you wouldn’t have hots for anyone else but him.

  11. susan
    July 14, 2010

    @concern dominican: why do you have to generalise every Dominician woman?,

  12. Don't trust
    July 14, 2010

    When these guys go abroad especially to study and come back home “TRUST ME” they have baggage. I was in love with someone like that and when the truth was revealed “Oh Boy Look Tory” Don’t be 1 out of 8 females claiming to be his woman and yes don’t forget the baby mama drama that comes with the package.

  13. MOT
    July 14, 2010

    @m s: I fully agree. who told you de high school sweetheart haven’t got a woman somewhere? What wrong with him? If he’s educated, and good-looking, there’s no way he don’t have another girl. Stop fooling yourself my dear. He’s just telling you what he thinks you want to hear i.e, he’s single and unattached. THE GRASS IS NOT GREENER ON THE OTHER SIDE!!! In any case, if you’ve cheated on your boyfriend a few times, is either he’s not satisfying you in bed, or you just like to run around. Be careful, you may be biting off more than you can chew.

  14. July 14, 2010

    Dear tie up,

    you have allot of answering to do,dios ayuda este muyer,if your man finds out your gone,leave the high school fella alone,and be good to your man or live on yourr one and do what ever you want

    mala muyer,

  15. Response reader
    July 14, 2010

    @SIRENE: All you Dominicans not easy!!! LOL

  16. Young man in dominica
    July 14, 2010

    My girl you are exactly what bella address you as a tie up even if you leave this man and go to ur high school sweet heart you stilll going to do the same thing tie up once a tie up always a tie up cant teach a old dog new tricks

  17. July 14, 2010

    my dearyou going down the wrong road sweetheart,stay with you man i never read that he is treating you badly,the pussy the high school sweetheart wants to get again and when he finish he leaving you and gone.STAY WITH YOU MAN.

  18. Tyhee
    July 14, 2010

    YOU HAVE NO RESPECT FOR UR CURRENT BF, YOU NOT TIE UP, YOU JUST NASTY! STRAIGHT UP, YOUR HEART CAN’T BE TWO PLACES AT DE SAME TIME, YOU SOUND LIKE UR RELATIONSHIP IS FINE AND THERE MIGHT NOT BE NO MAJOR PROBLEMS, AND YET YOU F-ING AROUND, SHAME ON YOU GIRL, YOU CAN’T LOVE A MAN AN CHEATING ON HIM, SA PAS LOVE…I WISH HE FOUND OUT, AND THEN YOU ENTER IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR HIGH SCHOOL SWEETHEART AND I WISH HE CHEAT ON YOU, EVERY NIGHT GO WITH A DIFFERENT GIRL ON YOUR HEAD, THEN YOU FEEL IT…FOOL…..

  19. BLUE PRINTS
    July 14, 2010

    Its obvious that you’re young and unsure of wat you want right now.. sleeping with the other guys have proven that you still wanna be out there and not committed to anything or anyone.. do yourself a favor my girl free yourself from your prison. none of wat you’re doing is going to benefit you now or later…you say you love your b/f but really he is just your comfort zone the place u can run to every time one of them flings fail… grow up and live up, respect yourself so others will respect you.. do your shit but do it in the right way… dont be going around hurting a man who has no idea the shit you putting him through.. and always protect yourself..

  20. concern dominican
    July 14, 2010

    that is just proveing that dominican women is not good.

  21. possie
    July 14, 2010

    now the seems like hes a good guy y wld u think off doing that 2 him
    but its done so just let him dwn slow and let him know its not there any more 4 him
    ps his like me i wld be gone if i find out theres no way i can sleep with u knowing u give
    another man my saltfish u mad

  22. ME
    July 14, 2010

    I am not surprised “your ..”..Is all you like dat that giving man “Go Pwell There”.

  23. Dr. Finger
    July 14, 2010

    Hey…its all about the sex. Be honest. The older guy may be unable to do it right so obviously you are getting your needs met. He is twice your age for crying out loud. Child take your thing and keep your mouth quiet. What the eye don’t see and the ears don’t hear does not hurt. Selfish maybe but die like a soldier, with your boots on. Just don’t go giving every man the man thing.

  24. drlove
    July 14, 2010

    what about leaving all of them alone and be by yourself and figure out what you want or who u want i think that is a better idea and dont be a fool the high school sweet heart dont have a woman well mr have a dayfoe so watch out

  25. poosky
    July 14, 2010

    lol @ sirenes comment.. Anyway, six yrs is alot.. you have not said anything bad about the guy so im assuming that he is treating u right. so why u wanna leave the guy for ur high school sweetheart that just come bek d/ca… stop being a b***h….

  26. SIRENE
    July 14, 2010

    NASTY! NASTY! SHAMELESS! AMEN!!

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