Bella,
My boyfriend is a great builder, perhaps one of the best in Dominica but he cannot read and write. I didn’t know that until I realized the weird vibes.
Like whenever he is doing estimates or reading plans, he would ask his partner to take charge of it all.
I honestly don’t know how he can build so well and he is illiterate. I would send him WhatsApp messages but he always sends back voice notes. I had no idea this was so.
I love him but don’t want a man who cannot read and write. We have been together for over a year and five months. We don’t have children but he met me with three girls who he has been taking care of.
He takes care of me as well. He is very very hard working and makes a good living but the cannot read a thing. Ahwah, I cannot deal with that.
How can I break up with him Bella? I will never stay with an illiterate man. Not me. I am too classy for that.
V
Hello V,
If you loved your boyfriend or better yet, understood what love really is about, then throwing him under the bus because he is uneducated wouldn’t be your first move.
I am in no position on how to advise you to break up with your partner.
You claim that he takes care of you but you are willing to throw that away because of his educational level?
How about talking to him about his shortcoming and seeking help for him? Even you can help him with reading at home.
There are also adult education classes he can enroll in.
When people love each other, they don’t just throw them away, especially because they have ended up in situations which they probably had little or no control over.
Maybe it is even pointless to remain in the relationship now that you have made your intentions known.
Break up with him in whatever way you chose. Don’t ask me for advice on ending a relationship just because of selfish, meaningless reasons.
There is probably a woman waiting in the wings to help him with his education and treat him with more understanding and respect than you have.
Bella
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nice article.thanks
You have no class ‘miss thing’ Do you even know how stupid your post is. You are so shallow – he should leave you and find someone else
What have you built lately? Can you build anything?
If you cannot build anything and he’s an expert builder but you can read and he cannot read yet he makes money and has a skill and you don’t, it seems like you’re the one who needs to learn from him and share what you know in return.
It’s unfortunate that people in life that are less capable can make people who have great skill and talent feel incapable. This is why it’s important to know your self worth before lesser people try to make you feel worthless like them.
If you knew what love was, you’d help the man and teach him as you would your children that supports, then help him enroll in adult education. I think the issue is not so much that he cannot read but that you’re jealous of his talent and it makes you feel like somebody to say these things because you can do something he can’t.
Well let’s not lambase the three children who were unfortunate enough to have Miss Classy as their mother, bad enough as it is. Miss Classy has an agenda, she is in love with someone else and simply looking for an excuse to leave a good man thus giving all women a bad name.
too classy yet you need a man to look after your 3 chirren. where are their classy dad(s)? that you attracted in the first place?
O.K. fancy pants, go right ahead and dump him because someone else will surely scoop him up. He’s taking care of you and your tribe, talking about classy. Go ahead girl and get your ‘educated’ man see if he will pass the educated money.
if he over 50 just send him to me i will teach him to read, girl you too fool, a man taking care of you and your kids, you saying that you have three kids and no baby daddy yet you classy, so find the baby daddy. and leave the man.
Classy my foot, go eat classy. I hope he sees this post and knows how to kick you to the curb.I hope he is not illiterate meaning he cannot read and still stupid meaning. he love you so much that he cannot walk away from you.if you don’t want the man just tell him. why do you want to tell bella and the whole of Dominica that?you think people do not know who you talking about? I believe you are the one who cannot read. at least the man have a skill,and a good one at that and knows how to count his money and save.I wish I could build a house or houses, you know how classy this is?you have no class miss so called classy.
if see saw this post, it wouldnt matter. he cant read. c’mon. keep up!
Oooh well looky here at Ms. Classy single with 3 kids. Let’s be honest here a single man with NO children decides to date you and you think you’re the prize. Honey please dump him so someone else can grab him up and appreciate him for all his redeeming qualities. Literacy or lack thereof shouldn’t be a deal breaker in a relationship but shallow women like yourself don’t know this. Anyway best of luck finding another man to pick you up with 3 extra pieces of luggage.
lolololollololololo!!!
Send him to me let me teach him to read and write. Make sure you don’t come begging him to come back you ………. So many women are being abused and mistreated by those who are supposed to be educated and know better and you that can read and write and was presented with a pot of gold, you still don’t know what to do with it? Send him to me. I will show you what to do with it.
I hope when he learn to read and write, and your next man have the same selfish ways as you, you don’t run back to him because you cannot deal with the same energy you were once giving out.
It took me a while to write this comment because I’m just so disappointed to hear a woman speak like that about someone she supposedly ‘loves’. You need to do some research on what love is because what you feel towards that young man is certainly not love. Why don’t you encourage him to go to some adult learning classes like Bella suggested or if he is not too comfortable why don’t you help him at home at least in the basics until he is ready to move higher. The way you sound you seem to be an English expert, well versed in all matters literary. Maybe it’s best you really end the relationship because he sounds like quite the gentleman and deserves so much better than you!! Ungrateful and selfish ish.
You should be helping him not dumping him because he cannot read and write. Have you considered that he may suffer from Dyslexia.
Dyslexia? She probaby doesn’t know what the word means…
well my dear if u ever loved this guy thats not a reason to break up. if u truely loved him u will help him get him to acknowledge his short coming and work on it with him in love
After he take of you and your three little kids now you want to live him. Instead you teach him how to read and write so you all can become one great happy family.
In this economy in Dominica who is going to take care of you and your three little kids!!
Ungrateful woman after he take care of you and your fhree little … kids that maybe have different fathers. Instead you try to help him to learn to read and write so you become a better family and stronger family know you want to leave him because of that the only thing I heard you complain about your ungrateful (B)
Wich Man in Dominica going to pick you up your fhree kids ain’t nobody going to pick you up with your three not me!!!
haha this is laughable you are too classy and so classy your so called illiterate man maybe one of the best builder in Dca. apparently your class wont allow you to take care of yourself and your daughters. Perhaps your class merited that you had children with different men and that’s the classy Dca women at best. Perhaps you have all the degrees a thermometer has what do they worth you. Finally if you truly love this guy use your class to teach him to read your daughter can also help because he helps them and that was your own confession. Education is not always about literacy because your boyfriend is able to do things many of us can’t come close to doing and that is building a house.
Well, not by writing him a note.
Throw the book at him instead.
This is getting serious. I am a young man 46 years of age. I am not a womanizer but I have dated different woman . Not at the same time. One at a time. I really don’t want to call women Dom. But I am really convince in my spirit that women don’t know what they want and looking for. The more you as a man treat them good. The more they find ways to walk away from you. This so call classy woman is just bloody stupid . Case close.
What have you done? five policemen came looking for you. Some things you did before I met you. I do not want the law in my yard. A thirty year old man no lover and no child of his own. Run him out quickly
@ Candid but what are u really trying to say there nuh???
Bella I too was frustrated reading this letter and yep I totally agree she should dump him because she doesn’t deserve him. He is way too good for her. Her classless self.
You may think you are classy but evidently you are not bright. From your description, the man deserves better than you and your baggage.
You are too classy for him but you spending the illiterate money at ease.
Go fine yourself an educated man who will treat you and you girls like ….. Some of you women out there are really something else.
I
2
3
Ohoh I was showing you how to count…to 4 kids.
SOT…Classy my foot..Bella should have sent the police to pick you up on the Scooter in handcuffs….with a poster on your back saying…I CAN READ BUT I CANNOT COUNT…(TEACH ME PLEASE) you uneducated …..
“How can I break up with him Bella? I will never stay with an illiterate man. Not me. I am too classy for that.”
You’d think someone who cares so much about literacy would know what “classy” means.
Mr Steve Foerster, don’t post many comments on DNO but he could always smell a rat 🐀 a long long way off, well said my man and Happy New year to you.
Bella, cannot read or write doesn’t mean that person is uneducated. Please read and understand the definition of educated. If you have to give advice in a column like that then you need to be more widely educated and well read.
You self is a ……. The woman claimed her man cannot read n write. You think he educated? Give bella a break tan
Watch those adjectives. educated, classy, unmarried, three fatherless girls, yet she criticized a hard working beautiful and handsome man who is supporting her and her fatherless children. Like we don’t know how a child came about. Obviously, she never left the children father and the builder is in the way. It took her eighteen months to observed the man was not a lover but only a boyfriend. She find it hard to kick him out after all he has done. Your cheating heart will find you some day.
Ok, so his money good but his mind is illiterate but not useless since he is “one of the best builders” on island
. I know you and the very man you are talking about and he has been warned accordingly.
You are pretending to love the man so much and there on DNO planing to dump him? You see you all Dca women, allu expect it ALL in one package so you can show off. Why don’t you take an interest in reading the prints and presenting his estimates so he can become even more successful?
No, you want the money from him the illiterate, but need a well dressed, classy, literate man with government job but makes no money so you can look professional. Take a hike and leave my friend alone. Your secret is now out. My dad always said that the “beaches” that look nice, clean and inviting are the most evil and deceptive underneath. You are a SORRY ONE!
Girl, you are one selfish …….. Break u with him, I wish you luck! Hope some other woman picks him up and help him with his problem, then you will want him back. Really, shame on you!
If you love him, just teach him. Nothing hard about that unless u are there for his earnings
Just teach the man to read and to do basic arithmetic.
That’s right Bella, drag her!!
Girl leave the man self, you DON’T deserve him! You haven’t even bothered to ask him directly. Not to say he illiterate and just sit down somewhere, the man making great use of the skills he has, found success AND he taking care of the THREE kids you brought along with you? Lady you very low to be considered Classy for putting down a man so. I Vex. I mod. I’m shook.
In this day and age being illiterate must come with a great reason. Perhaps he’s dyslexic , perhaps he suffered trauma. How dare you look down on him when he’s worked so hard to provide and go past his limitations. Man on the block you looking like. I well want a good man, I’ll teach him, my major is English.
You like his money but not his brain like Bella say get help for him that will show how much you love him and he will love you more I know lots of business men and women that could not read and write but was successful in life because their partners take the time to help them its not just the money and sex show your love.
the man taking care of you & your THREE girls without checking no sin and that’s how you want to thank the man?
my girl i wish you well in your future. SMH
OMG! What an UNGRATEFUL, WORTHLESS ting you are. I won’t DARE call you as Classy, as you tried calling yourself V! I PRAY to God that someone he knows figure out that is Him you talking about & READ it all to him so he can LEAVE you for you to go find your babies daddy, or daddies to provide for them & you as well as he does.
Woman you are a stupid, selfish fool who have no clue what love means. You should leave the man alone because he deserves better.
Girl, your boyfriend is not illiterate. YOU are foolish! He lets his partner take over to share the work or maybe he does a better job at it, than him. He is one of the best builders in DA so he must be busy. You WhatsApp him, he reads it but he’s too busy to text so he sends voice msgs. Has he ever sent you the wrong answers to whatever you texted him? Sounds like you just like the dollars to help with your kids and nothing else. Go ahead. Break up with him because he deserves a woman who truly loves him and does not think he’s illiterate simply because she can’t reason for herself. Then wait and see which educated, literate builder or banker will pick you up. Make sure you write bella to tell her because I want to know. Sackway sort.
Thanks bela. She have things too good.
Ya..bella hit it to you hard wii…you’re very selfish indeed
Lady, if the man not good enough for you then you leave. You do not need Bella for that. You are a woman of class so just go. Stop using the man Money on your children and when you leave,let All the things he bought you stay where they are.
Woman of class, hope you have a plan
Great advice Bella. This woman is selfish. I hope the man find someone who can help and love him at the same time.
I agree with you Bella, if she teach him he will read and write. The man is in need help him PLEASE,
Some years ago I had a friend who , like your man, was very talented, but had problems reading and writing. He got married to a woman from the UK. I met up with him a few years afterwards, and was taken back to this man discussing some topics like a pro. His wife had taken him in hand and taught him the basics. Work with your man.
Is reading and writing a criterion for love? How much better can the father(s) of your children read? Why don’t you just talk to him, and help him. Is it not just funny how women are quick to state well is it because I am a woman?
Lets be for real, if you have three children that are not this man’s own and he is helping you with them, you should consider yourself to be lucky, because one could come to the conclusion that were not able to keep the father(s) of your children around. So come on sis, you may never again be as lucky to have another man like him in your life.
Just like he is helping you with your kids, you should in turn help him with his issues. Please do not be selfish.
If you had any serious level of education, him being illiterate would have been obvious from the first time you spoke to him. Looks like you may not have accomplished much yourself. It’s little thing you are single with three children and depending on a man to provide for them.
Right Bella; you responded well! The woman with three children,no husband, is fooling herself with the idea that she’s too classy for a well skilled man who can take care of himself and a family
I tell you, that island has some crazy foolish people!!!
am sure Bella! someone. Yes she is selfish. A woman breaking up with a man because of his educational background which he may probably have no control over. Of course there is Adult education and as you say she can help too. What is this. All you always want, want and do not want to give anything?
Bella I like that too -“Break up with him in whatever way you chose. Don’t ask me for advice on ending a relationship just because of selfish, meaningless reasons.
There is probably a woman waiting in the wings to help him with his education and treat him with more understanding and respect than you have.”
Teach him to read then. What is classy? Teach the man, he will be grateful for that. Let him know gently that u realise he cannot read & tell him u can teach him.
Selfish heartless woman you are. !!!!It’s always all about you and what you want. Y didn’t he dump you having already three most likely illegitimate kids of yours that he is not responsible for???!!!! On top of that you are well on almost two years with him and all his sweat and labour are feeding your children plus u which aren’t his and he has no problem with that. Hahahaha and u claim to be TOO CLASSY for likes of him???? Give me a break. U are d one way below his Calibre . Don’t u knowTRUE CLASS is something about thei inner character and less about academic excellence? U are t worth this man and thats the real truth. The sooner u walk out on him or he leaves u d much better for him. Trust me, mark in your memory my meaaage today. D day will come and soon too, when u will literally crave for him. Pity I don’t know him personally otherwise I promise u I wouldn’t wait for u to voice your thoughts to him but I would personally tell him so myself and hook him up with someone…