DEAR BELLA: I’m in love with a poisonous woman; what’s the antidote?

Bella,

I am in love with a girl and based on the things I am now finding out that girl is poison.
The only thing is that she has already infected me and there seems to be no cure.
I met her through a friend who works at the bank. Well I am beginning to think her friend looked at my savings and tried to hook us up because that woman was in serious debt.
Anyway, I cleared all her debt once we got together. Let’s say we fell in love.
Bella, after Maria, I decided to have her move in because her home was compromised and I paid to have her house repaired.
She decided it might be best to rent her place since many people were out of a proper home. So she stayed with me and rented her home.
I can attest to the fact that at first she was helpful, clean and she took care of my home.
But now, she is making some weird demands that got me thinking whether she is for real.
She asked me to help her further her studies. I told her well, let’s get married and she refused. Then she is asking for money to go on a cruise but I won’t be coming.
She said she needs a break from Dominica. I told her only if I am part of the cruise.
Since that time, everything she used to do, she does it no more.  She don’t cook, wash, clean – nothing.
In fact, she hired a help behind my back. Some Haitian girl and I am paying the girl while she sits and does nothing.
I can’t ask her to leave, because she has a three year contract with the people to whom she rents which doesn’t end in another year.
But I can’t manage her anymore. She would stay on the phone for hours at nights talking to men and I am right there.
She goes out and stays until 5 a.m. She has no respect for me.
What should I do?
Venom.

Venom,
It seems you were stung by a deadly scorpion and it has somehow poisoned you indeed. But be of good courage because it doesn’t have to kill you.
It is quite obvious that this woman is sticking around for the money and be thankful that you are finding out before you went blindly into marrying her.
Her rejection of your marriage offer was a blessing and the only one you should be feeling sorry for is her and not you.
I understand you may not want to ask her to leave because you were part of the process of having her lease her home.
But listen. This is your house and it is your prerogative to demand respect and peace in it.
You need to let her know the terms under which she can remain there, or have her leave the house. It is simple as that.
When she entered the house, she came in as your partner and now, she no longer holds that status, so it’s okay for her to leave, especially because of this gross disrespect that she is showing to you.
Be a man about the situation. Get that woman out of your house and out of your life.
I think you have done enough for her.
Best,
Bella

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30 Comments

  1. sot
    August 12, 2019

    padnah…send me your number so I can send for you in the US..I make US$30 an hour… doh need your money…but I could need somebody like you that financially stable…put your house for rent too and come up…

  2. August 12, 2019

    Boy get the woman off your life . Tell her to fly away.

  3. jamie
    August 12, 2019

    Padna start running,or go by the obeah man.

  4. Bigman tings
    August 12, 2019

    first of.. don’t just open your home to any nice figure and a sad story!
    2rd any person that cannot express sincere gratitude to a helping hand, should be sent back from whence they came!!

  5. Zandoli
    August 12, 2019

    Padna, are you a little boy? Only little boys would not know what to do with a woman like that.

  6. SMH
    August 12, 2019

    they sharmay you pal… :mrgreen:

  7. As if
    August 12, 2019

    “I can’t ask her to leave, because she has a three year contract with the people to whom she rents which doesn’t end in another year.”

    Who cares about HER CONTRACT WITH THEM, IT’S NOT WITH YOU. She’s not bothered with you, she doesn’t care, why should you??

    That ungrateful leech needs to be burnt off.

    No mercy! Pack up all her crap and tell her peace.

  8. KickThatThingOut
    August 12, 2019

    When you drink that water my boy that does make you tebeh… I know about it, it’s not obeah or she maweh you it’s just simple human nature to be lust at that flesh… and you cannot leave that sweet thing.
    However, for every toxic relationships there is an ever more toxic antidote, it’s high Time you put down ur foot and act as the prehistoric man and take that bi#$% sorry bull by the horn and put her rass out. No softness, no heart, no kindness cause if you do she will find you weakness and cause you to take her back. Just remember the advice of the others… it’s quite clear that she has at least someone else. Why would she not want to marry you? Why not take a cruise ship trip with you? She is sitting her rear end all day doing nothing chatting men on social media. ………………………………. bro just get that b€@{# out!!!

  9. Casio
    August 12, 2019

    The antidote for poison is never too far from the source of the poison itself. Usually thats how nature works.

  10. Castries
    August 11, 2019

    How to I message Bella with a story?…Just curious.

    ADMIN: You can send an email to [email protected]

  11. Man bites dogs
    August 11, 2019

    I often ask myself if those comments I read from people asking, Bella for her opinion is true because I cannot believe how people could be so naive to let a woman take him for a ride like that 🤣 it was a sting between the bank worker and her to what i am reading, we all are human mistakes are made when the sult fish is sweet it’s hard to tell her enough is enough and if she bend over to pick up something man what can you say is joke i making with you ha!! 🙊

  12. August 11, 2019

    Just put her things outside and change your locks. The longer this goes on, the more miserable you are going to feel. Rember, the lady has already demonstrated that you are only and ATM to her. Even a blind mand can see that. Yoiu cannot even get fake cake from her; she is of no value to you.

  13. huh
    August 11, 2019

    dont call no obeah man/woman from the USA!!!! put that girl out her many men will assist her and have a pastor pray over your house and get some prayer oil and plead the blood of God over your self and home daily. ebeh wey some women have the most luck huh

  14. UDOHREADYET
    August 11, 2019

    “Give them an inch they take a yard, give them a yard they take a mile.” Some peoples minds are corrupted, they think if you’re not cheating and abusing them, they should be the ones doing it to you. its mental programming (weak minds, easy fodder for the devil), those people don’t know how to be happy, they only know of one way to live, in chaos. these are the people that try to the down well meaning people and inadvertantly keep overall society from progressing because when you should be planning for the future they keep you in the present and the past, they turn wealth into poverty, good relationships into bad, families into broken homes and trust into resentment and dislike. Another weaker man would have turned abusive and made himself the bad person, take Bella’s advice end it and End IT FAST. Also that so called friend that hooked you up with her is a frenemy.

  15. Joel
    August 11, 2019

    My boy sooo much woman it have out there you worry with that mashopper. Better to check scene on a Spanish from mero them seasons there; way cheaper

  16. August 11, 2019

    Those kinds of problems in a relationship always have to do with the fact that people mistake the difference between “Love” and “human affection”.

    We need to know that “Love” is spiritual and it binds us together; man and woman, children and parents, close relative and friends. When we are bonded in Love, we are always looking out for our loved ones.

    Venom you mentioned that you and this girl “fell in love” and that is where you made the mistake. The falling was of human affection maybe even on your alone, she must a great actor. Why would she want to go on a cruise without you, if she loved you?

    You are lucky that she did not accept your marriage proposal, and she knew why she didn’t. Now get rid of her as soon as you can–don’t call it “being in Love” because, between the two of you, Love has nothing to do with it–especially on her side.

  17. lmckoy
    August 11, 2019

    Ten chances to one you are much older than she is. Your situation sounds similar to those retired men who have a good pension and are being scammed by young women. Your situation is more common than you know and some have ended in tragedy. Consider yourself lucky UP TO THIS POINT; get rid of her now.

  18. Astounded
    August 10, 2019

    Wow that’s unfair and I’m a woman.Why treat someone who is there for you regardless of,in that manner?.Karma has a funny way of paying us back.

  19. baret
    August 10, 2019

    my boy give me a call let me tell u.what u.can do do not waist.no time my #301549 0610 I am in the USA call me now

  20. %
    August 10, 2019

    But what I hearing there nah papi God! The house is not yours man? She needs to push you out of the house too! Ha!Ha!Ha!
    Just now she will take another man in … Get ready, for you will be pushed out!

  21. The Mongoose
    August 10, 2019

    Venom.
    That was some good and wonderful advice (antidote) from Bella. You better drink it before it’s too late. The bottom line is, let her know she’s not welcomed at your house anymore……PUT HER OUT NOW.

  22. Looking for love
    August 10, 2019

    If she doesn’t want you Please let me know. I’m single looking for someone. I don’t understand y women these days so busy for money from a man. What about being independent!!!! .

    • Me too
      August 11, 2019

      @looking for love sorry my dear that was suppose to be a thumbs up for you but mistakenly I hitted the thumbs down .You are so right while others are looking for love other take love for granted …..He need to give her at least a month for her to get somewhere to live as far as I see he’s being used he really needs to get raid of her .

  23. Faith
    August 10, 2019

    Where can I find a man so? -asking for myself

  24. Acela
    August 10, 2019

    My brother u have issues knowing what’s a good relationship qualities u spair the rod and u spoiled the bitch

  25. Bwa-Banday
    August 10, 2019

    Man you don drink the water too :mrgreen: :mrgreen: ! I know her based on the information you wrote.

    Partner run run run and keep on running until you can’t run no more. The woman have a man out there so kick her out ASAP. Her having a contract on her house is none of your worry so change her name to Caroline and tell her take her bundle and go. You say poison? That woman is worse than satan himself and will run you dry. Ask her previous boyfriend and he will you about the diaspora man she has sending her money monthly. Please don’t marry that woman because if you think she bad now you have not seen anything yet.

  26. Keeping It Real!
    August 10, 2019

    Young man, her lack of loyalty and dishonesty and not wanting to be with you for the right reasons is screaming right at you.

    I do agree with Bella, please get out of this woman’s life. It’s not too late now, just admit that you have lost abit but if you are strong and consider yourself a man of faith, you will pick up the pieces and move on. There are much better opportunities out there for you. Just move cautiously.

    At the same time, if you want to communicate further, feel free to share your contact information with me via Dear Bella, however, I reside out of Dominica.

    Blessings

  27. JoJo
    August 10, 2019

    Young man, her lack of loyalty and dishonesty and not wanting to be with you for the right reasons is screaming right at you.

    I do agree with Bella, please get out of this woman’s life. It’s not too late now, just admit that you have lost abit but if you are strong and consider yourself a man of faith, you will pick up the pieces and move on. There are much better opportunities out there for you. Just move cautiously.

    At the same time, if you want to communicate further, feel free to share your contact information with me via Dear Bella, however, I reside out of Dominica.

    Blessings

  28. Princess taurus
    August 10, 2019

    I can tell u what to do … i grantee u it must work

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