DEAR BELLA: Ready to die for my ghetto man


I’m in love with this boy and I feel like I am ready to give my life up for him because my parents doesn’t want us to be together.

I am 17 and they somehow feel like he is too low for me.

Just because he hangs out in the ghetto all day and smoke a little herb, they think he is bad but he really isn’t.

He’s a sweet guy who loves me; hugs me; makes me feel special. Plus, he gives me money all the time.

My mother and father says I have to chose between him and them. I chose him. Now that I have made my decision they want me out of the house.

But I have no where to go because the boy in question lives in a downstairs of his mother house with two other guys. Matter of fact when I come there they usually have to go so me and bae can spend time alone.

I told my parents last night I will kill myself if I cannot have the guy and my father say make sure I die when I attempt to because he is not fascinated by attempted suicide.

Bella what kind of father is that? Anyway, so I giving my parents the end of the month to accept my boyfriend or accept my death.

Romeo and Juliette

Hello Dear,

Your rebellion will only land you in trouble and disaster is already knocking on your door.

I’m not going to water down my response because based on your tone and use of words, you are quite aware of your actions and very intelligent.

If you wanted to kill yourself you wouldn’t be writing to Bella.  I think you are just trying to throw a pity party, hoping your parents would be threatened by your suicide claims and allow your ghetto man to be in your life.

I believe your parents want what is best for you. Sitting in the ghetto all day smoking herb, isn’t quite the picture your parents have in mind of a partner for you and you must understand that.

But at the end of the day, the decision is yours to make.

Your parents gave you an ultimatum: leave the ghetto man or leave their house. You decided to add the suicide note to the matter. So now you have three choices. Choose one.

And for your sake, I hope you choose to stay at home.


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  1. Kaykay
    May 10, 2022

    Bella ,it’s been a while I have seen some real good advise from you that I totally agree with.That child want noticing.Go and study your book not man .

  2. Jean and Dinah
    August 23, 2019

    Eh beh Look it noticing you want nah

  3. Hon. Dr. Roosevelt Skerrit
    August 21, 2019

    LMAO. Mamselle father is a straight up Gangsta ahahahah! De boi checking “I’m not fascinated by attempted suicide…” :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: legend!

  4. Nana-Lain
    August 19, 2019

    AA, what I seeing there nah? @ Romeo and Julliette, if you want to kill yourself just do it nah instead of seeking advise. I hope your BAE feels the same way
    because when you kill yourself by montth-end, he will have BRAND NEW BAE two days after they put your lifeless body in the morgue to prepare it for burial and after they bury you , there is no return…actually after you kill yourself…there is no return. And you know what that BAE of yours is going to say “That Sakway Sot ” kill herself for me. GIRL,stop being a fool and take the advise your parents.
    youeople try talking to him about you, he will just say ” That sakway sot go an kill herself for me”.

  5. Bwa-Banday
    August 19, 2019

    Girl you are the boss of stupidity and flat out immature. You smart enough thou to threaten suicide but that’s just a ploy to have your parents ease up on you. Your hormones are raging I see. That so called ghetto man will sure be happy to use and abuse you until the baby comes along then dump you for the next vulnerable fool.

    I love the choices Bella gave but I sincerely hope you will control your hormones , close your legs, read the Bible, go to holy communion, say the rosary and respect the wishes of your parents. Life is NOT the bed of roses you are looking forward to in the ghetto.

  6. Not Pushing Daises
    August 19, 2019

    As a parent of four 18 plus year olds, I can certainly attest that teenagers and some young adults can literally drive their parents crazy at times in spite of parental best efforts.

    Some parents will face more challenges than others trying to guide their little “princess and princesses” through the turbulent teen years. Many parents are under the sad illusion that the boy or girl next door is the problem while their child is a perfect angel.

    All we can do as concerned parents is to make sure we try our best to fulfill our parental responsibilities by nurturing and preparing level headed youngsters to cope in this sometime crazy world.

  7. I use to be you
    August 19, 2019

    A man that cant put a roof over his own head has no money at all…
    Stay home sweet girl

  8. I use to be you
    August 19, 2019

    What our parents see sitting.down, we children will never see no matter where we stand. You may think you love this man now but i am betting my last dollar if u were to wait at least 5 years you would wonder if u were in your right senses.. 😪 we are to fast for life sometimes that we forget that guaranted or not tomorrow always comes.. My dear patience will get you the right man at the right time . So forget this man , obey your parents and wait for that special man who will give you more than just hugs and kisses and temporary sence of self worth . Wait for the man that will give u the world not just chicken change . Cause a man that put over his own head has no money at all. Why settle for hundreds when waiting will get you thousands and even millions. What we want at 17 we will not want at 30.. stay at home sweet girl

  9. mine
    August 19, 2019

    If your so called boyfriend loves you he would make his two roommates leave and take you inn. My mother used to say when you in good house bad house is calling you. Young listen to you parents.

  10. Athanasia
    August 19, 2019

    This young man cannot even provide a dwelling place for you. At least your parents have a roof over your head. Take your head out of the clouds and smell the bush tea girl. Do not give up bread for biscuit. Take your time, 17 is very young and if you live to be 37 or even 27 you will look back and see the silliness of the phase you are going through now.

  11. Casio
    August 19, 2019

    Ladies and Gentlemen, our future, sadly is in the hands of these people, the next generation.

    • Zoe
      May 7, 2021

      Please. The older generation are hardly better.

  12. jamie
    August 19, 2019

    Girl your young and think of your future,this guy have nothing to offer you,the money is hustle money and soon you will be begging your parents to come back,many of you young women and men just keep putting shame on your families.

  13. Kalinago
    August 19, 2019

    First of all get your education, get a job so you can provide for yourself, that way you do not have to be dependent on a man to give you money all the time. Then think about what decisions you are going to make concerning your boyfriend. If he feels the same way about you then he should understand. Everything is nice right now, he makes you feel special etc. But wait when you guys start to have children and you do not have a place of your own and cannot provide for them. That’s when you will see how nice he really is and worst of all he hangs out in the ghetto.

  14. Dunce
    August 19, 2019

    Hahaha that is funny wonder how the love of your life feels.about you commiting suicide.

  15. Totoy
    August 19, 2019

    Just don’t get pregnant. Your child will not be grateful because you put it in a life of misery.

  16. Jeff
    August 19, 2019

    My girl according to Asa your …… my girl tell your mother you done with mr and take yor bord and coolout in silence …. or come check me I living upatairs my mother housee me alone..

    • Ajee
      August 19, 2019

      Allu dem little girls just retarded.

  17. Choose your words
    August 18, 2019

    My fellow Dominicans be careful what you say to a person who is suicidal. Just the thought of thinking it and persons saying she should do it is actually helping her to kill herself. That’s wrong. Help the lady to recognize her bad thoughts by uplifting her. She need our guidance . Not everyone knows how to make right decisions at such a confusing age. From adolescence to adult it’s a period of raging hormones where one thinks she is mature enough to what is best for them. Even adults get crazy in love where the forget about their kids and just want to be with that new love. Making them feel special like they never felt. Do you know her home condition. Meaning is treated with love and understanding or is she being stiffled. Also the parents could be very loving and wants the ghetto life. We do-not know. The lady needs therapy. As a loving society we should offer some counseling and help to the lady. Before some thing bad happens.

    • August 19, 2019

      @Choose your words, people who are suicidal hardly make it visible to those around him or her, far more to send it to a news media.

      That young lady is not suicidal, she is simply trying to boss her parents to go along with her fallible choice, by using the threat of suicide. That is a very weak display on her part.

  18. Choose your words
    August 18, 2019

    I am shocked at the responses that U are giving. When a person is thinking of taking their life for whatever reason. This means that the person is suicidal and going through some crises and they don’t know how to deal with the problem , that is not a joke. Young lady u have a long life ahead of you. Your life is precious and no human being is worth having to take your life for. Do not even think of this. He would not do that for u. When you die he would find another lady to replace you. Abide by your parents rule. Get your education, find a job then you can move out and love who you want. This is the worst thought. Ask god to cleanse your mind from such evil thoughts. To the father you are wrong to tell your daughter to make sure she die. You should tell her that she is precious and beautiful. And that she must leave the man because clearly he cannot give a good future because he is headed down the wrong path in life. Jail, murdered for drugs, poverty, mental .

  19. August 18, 2019

    Juliette, you say that you are 17 years old, that is the reason your parents have to watch the boys whom you date–especially that you are living under their roof.

    I was 17 too, and at that age, if my parents had rejected my boyfriend, maybe I would react just as you speak–except for your foolish idea of suicide.

    I am here to tell you that you do not know one thing about Love, and if you do not go along with the foolish decision of yours, when you reach my age you will thank yourself for staying alive.

    By that time you will know the bliss of Love so well; you will know that Love is not just about hugs, kisses, and receiving money–in fact, most of the time Love has nothing to do with those emotions.

    Girl, your experience right now is human affection. By the time you reach 30, you will have had those emotions towards, much, more than one guy.

    Love and human affection are not the same. Don’t go taking your Life in the name of Love

  20. Braindamage
    August 18, 2019

    Du Du Darling…you are just 17.
    Stay home and think of college.
    The other choices, Ghetto man or suicidal, you are dome.

  21. Around watching
    August 18, 2019

    Young lady have you talk to the guy about your intensions? Talk to him and hear what he says.

  22. Vic
    August 18, 2019

    Yes girl go ahead with a knife. I’ll come to the funeral and send you the most resent picture of your man with his new girlfriend a few days after your funeral.

  23. Didi
    August 18, 2019

    Are theses stories real life lol asking for myself …. It’s always been too surrealistic

  24. %
    August 18, 2019

    You sound very childish still! Why would you kill yourself if you cannot get the guy.. Really? If the guy was prepared for you, he would have somewhere to put you (a house). I think that you have not understood your parents love for you, and you need immediate counselling, three days a week!!!

  25. Gouvelma
    August 18, 2019

    Hey young lady stop talking of attempted and manning suicide. You may attempt it and left scarred for life. I hope and pray that by month end your parents do not accept you boucan. If you cut youf wrist you may survive and people redicule you for the rest of your life. If you jump in front a moving car you may be bruise and scarred for life. If you try to drown yourself a good swimmer may be there to save you. If you ask for gramaxone people will deny you it since you are not a farmer. There is what I want you to do. Go to the pharma y and buy a bottle of paracetamol. You do not need a prescription. Go to ANY gas station in Dominica and ask for a bottle of brake fluid. Tell them I sent you and I will pay for if. Then you catch a bus, go to mark beach. Take as much tablet as you can into your mouth and wash them down with the brake fluid and lay down on the chair and relax. By the time you are spotted no one will be able to save you. That will prove your love to him. Parents forward

  26. Kalinago Justice
    August 18, 2019

    :?: Seems like this young immature lady is looking for sympathy and to be pitied :?: If you’re so silly to choose being suicidal instead of your parent’s advice,then carry on…

  27. Dee
    August 18, 2019

    Oh my. Bella you just don’t mix words.. how you want to leave a good house for a bad house..

  28. Kalinago Justice
    August 18, 2019

    :?: I am not here to be judgemental about anyone. But sitting on the ghetto all day smoking as we usually see the youngsters do,is not a good sign! Where does he gets the money given to you, what’s his source of income :?: As a young man who wants to have a young lady,he should be productive. Parents may not be always right, but they’ve got the age, maturity and experience that makes them able to see things that younger ones, children don’t and can’t see for themselves. You may get pregnant for this young man who’s job is sitting all day in the ghetto smoking, therefore this leaves the responsibility on your parents since you are still living at their home. You’re still pretty much a young lady, having a man now should not be a priority. You should try engaging yourself in some meaningful self development until you’re in a position for caring for yourself and when you start having a family of your own. Right now, you and the boy are in no way able to care for each other.

  29. August 18, 2019

    Very nice respond Bella. I would give the young girl the rope or the knife to kill herself. Young girl. This is very Dom and stupid on your part. Firstly the young man sits in the getto all day smoking a little weed. He don’t smoke a little. He smoke a lot of weed. And you know what smoking does. Second. Where does he get the money from when he sits at the getto all day. He sell drugs to give you money. Thirdly. You threatening your parents about killing yourself. ( big mistake) I think your father responded nicely. Young
    Girl. Being in love with a getto man is not a problem. But you need to stop and think about your action before it’s to late and you have to regret.

  30. Doh Do Majee With Yourself 2k19
    August 18, 2019

    This one is clearly doing Majee with herself. Two big slap from her mother or father can fix that. Easy !

  31. lmckoy
    August 18, 2019

    At this point, your behaviour indicates that you are on the road to wasting your life. If you were sensible and had ambition, you would be concentrating your energy on becoming independent, being able to take care of yourself. Instead, look at what you are engaged in. Clearly, something else sweet you now – hopefully you will get some sense before the tragedy comes. To your father, as difficult as it may be, he should stick to his decision.

  32. TJ
    August 17, 2019

    Well said Bella. I hope she open her eyes, open her heart, the problems your generation creates, then make your decision and live with it. I can see a spoil brat in you.

  33. These kids.. smh
    August 17, 2019

    My girl you have to be a special kinda stupid or you just plain ignorant!
    You not seeing or feeling how HARD Dominica getting, you want to go and mostly likely mess up your life for no reason! Then put your parents under some unnecessary pressure.

  34. Hard back iller
    August 17, 2019

    Girl love your man eh.. Me that is u I even stop go school too.. Your parents know nothing.. You’ll be the happiest person in the world.. If you lucky he might make you his baby mama before 20 then leave you with the kid.. I say go for it baby girl.. You’re 17 nobody knows more about life than you.. You go girl…

    • Unknown
      August 19, 2019

      @Hard back Killer. You made my morning. I cant stop laughing :-D :-D :-D :-D

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