I just started college and the work load is kind of getting to me. I wanted something as a ‘free up’ on the weekends to get my mind off things.
Well, I don’t drink alcohol and I am not much of a ‘sewo’ person.
I have been doing basically one night stands over the past few weekends. I find this to be very helpful because I always start the week full of energy. The sex over the weekends acts like a fuel booster and I always feel like taking on the week with much more vigor.
I have access to emergency contraceptives so I don’t have to worry about getting pregnant. I have been with quite a few guys since then.
I am wondering if this is the right thing.
Help
Dear Help,
This is a dangerous thing your are playing with. There are too many diseases going on around the place to be having relations with “quite a few guys.”
You must act now and find creative ways to ‘boost’ your energy.
In the meantime trying finding someone you can start a long term relationship with. Long term relationships are generally better than one night stands.
Bella
Judging from what I hear about college and university life these days this is not an isolated case. On the contrary it reflects an increasingly popular lifestyle. Part of the blame must be laid on insitutions themselves for the godless teachings that are part of modern secular education such as evolution, situation ethics, etc., and the extra cirricular clubs and societies that are allowed on the campuses in the name of progress, freedom of speech, and equality. What is not taken into consideration is that there is at the same time an increase in alcohol problems, drug abuse, STD, depression, and suicides among the students. Christian schools where Jesus is Lord and the Bible is honoured may not be 100% free of these problems but they have much lower rate. I would like to say this to the young lady. God has given you a precious gift. For lack of a better word I will call it “womanhood”. It includes a female body, soul, and spirit. In it are reproductive organs and something known as sexuality. It includes the ability to be a wife to man and a mother to his children. Why would you give part of your womanhood away to a man who gives you nothing in return except a few brief moments of pleasure and leaves you wondering if you have done the right thing? On the contrary, if you have had any significant Christian influence in your bringing up you would walk away feeling guilty and unclean. You shoul know that you mean absolutely nothing to the men who have used you. To them you are nothing more than a conquest. If you heard the way they talk – the way they describe you to other men – you would feel so ashamed you would want to loeave that campus and not return for a long, long, tme. Why would you not want to save what you have for the one special man who will give you his name and be the proud father of your children? Sex belongs only in marriage between a husband and wife. The Bible says sex outside marriage between two people who are not married to each other is a sin. It is called “fornication.” The Bible says in 1 Corinthians 6:9-10 that fornicators will not inherit the kingdom of God. So finding a steady boy friend to fornicate with is not the answer either! Your`one night stands are turning you into damaged goods less and less desirable to the kind of man you would want for a husband. We attract to ourselves the kind of person we oourselves are. Unless you want to marry a serial fornictor you better make a radical change in your lifestle now – I mean now – or that will be the only kind of man who will marry. If you marry such a man the chance of him being faithful to you is very slim because that would be contrary to his very nature. All is not BAD news! If you repent (that means turn away from your sins) and believe that Jesus Christ died for your sins and rose again, and receive Him as your personal Saviour, His blood will cleanse you from ALL your sins! Please read these verses in your Bible. Believe and act upon them – not because I said so – but because these are the very promises of God Himself! Acts 3:19, Acts 16:31 1 Corinthians 15:2-4, St. John 1:12 with Revelation 3:20, 1 John 1:7, and now 2 Corinthians 5:17 Please visit my website http://www.livinghopeministries.ca in the right margin click on to the EAGLE COURSE. This 12 Lesson Workbook Manual can be studied from the screen OR copied absolutely free! The first lesson will show you how to receive Christ as your Saviour and begin a new life that is so full it overflows! Sincerely, Rev. Donald Hill. Pentecostal Evangelist.
Bella keep it real nah plz
LOL Afoss leh zoh weh un ti pwel zor kweh zor cest femme!!! my girl get a man…it better to do it with one man!!!! than to pass like a village scooter! all man riding u!
Nasty she nasty
OK!!!!!!! I’m not going to judge you. and all you people calling the young girl all kinds of names, none of you not in a position to do that…maybe you guys doing the same thing in sigway.
I just started college as-well and i’m stressed to but i don’t go around having one night stand…my best advice to you is hang out with some friends, go out, make jokes…enjoy yourself in a clean way
Find yourself a boyfriend. he may not be the right guy but make him your only sex pathner.
Its not hygienic at all…and i’m certain you know about diseases out their…you’re putting yourself at risk. stop before its to late.
lol……look it
Girl
I am with you every weekend
I do the same thing
and I am a male
“I am wondering if ‘m doing the right thing”? Girl you known damn well what you’re doing is wrong. Are you out of your mind? Do you think that’s how much you worth? Your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost, and you need to present your body as a living sacrifice unto the Lord. Please go to your spiritual leader or some close friend to talk to.
if this was a boy we would be cheering him on and just encourage him to use condoms–playa playa– but because this is a girl she’s a nasty bitch???? seriously. we all need to stop being judgemental here. what works for peter doesn’t always work for paul– not everyone wants a relationship. some people are satisfied with just sex. the importance here is that she protects herself, select her partners carefully and not allow the sex to get in the way of her education.
my girl no offence bt…WHAT THE ….!!…U NT TIRED,U JUST DESPERATE 4 SEX OR U LONLY AND U LOOKING FOR A MAN DAT EATING UR PUSSY GUD THINKING HE GOIN TO LIKE U AT THE END..that that happening there wii!!
my girl ease up urself eh and find a man that will help and support u both finanially and emotionally!!!
Just a pointer here. Most people claim to want a good partner but when they do get it they let it go to go chasing after the opposite.
Some people only claim to want a good partner in words but in action it’s totally different.
So u never know if that’s her aim/motive then maybe it might just work for her eh.
girl u need to deal with problems you might be holding on to.were you abused as a child? have you ever been raped? if yes to any of those questions you need to get yourself some counseling your sexual appetite might just be a disease/addiction and you think you need energy,your feeding the disease girl, do something more constructed with your life instead of throwing it away ,you are in college you should be wiser ,having unprotected sex with guys you don’t even know is a death wish,go to a Dr. get all the necessary test done make sure your clean and find a good counselor.
@ truth….we have to be careful of what we say to & about ppl…there are woman who are just addicted to sex and it is caused by a hormone….it can be difficult for some women..so what she needs basically is just some help into knowing how to control it.
@ wat a thing. Som1 addicted to alcahol is an alcaholic. Som1 addicted drugs is a drug addict. A woman addicted to sex and with many different men is a salop. If it was just sex addiction she could self-stimulate or keep 1 safe reliable partner.
Someone additcted to sex is a sex adict all you always want to call ppl salop n whore n all does forget we got mothers sisters and neices stupes.
If she’s not a salop who is? A sex addict is a salop? lol
Nymphomaniac = a woman that no matter how many orgasms or partners is never satisfied. yes its a condition of the min d and body but the person is still a salop. A salop does it for free a whore does it for money.
@ hmmm wat a thing
We do not know what type of person she is and how she was nurtured.
Anyone can be addicted to sex. It all depends on their mentality. This woman needs to keep busy and otherwise and in the Lord, worship and pray to Him.
She needs the blessing and grace of God. Be addicted to God rather than sex. The latter is the devil’s workshop which leads to nowhere, no peace of mind and happiness.
OMG! omg! omg! where is ur pride and dignity? i think what u should do is get some positive friends that will keep you occupied interms of getting ur mind off school on the weekends. go to the beach ect. and if u feel to have sex then stick to one ” friend with benefits” dont go giving up ur body like that to everyone. it is the temple og the Lord..
bella want attention she does make up them stories and she cannot give advise anyway lol
@ not pleased with Bella
Why waste your time to comment. This comment should not even be allowed.
Whooossss and i was just going to write to say Bellsss what happening ot the columns and them then u have this Nasty Ti-Salop writing about one night stand. But but those little vemins in dominica there taking all there big wood and by the time they hit there mid 20s the sus wesay but lord help this little Sal that write to Bella may you re-direct her life to the books and not the weekend wood she taking in her bakery to make her bread. PAPA ZORRRR
ADMIN: You show your face only when your friend Bella comes on man. Hahahahaha.
WHOSSSSSSS ADMIN well if you act right i will show my face more to u dear.. Admin you want a peice of Pusina bad i see..
ADMIN: Hahahahahaha
Whosss HAHAHAHA Admin thats not what u saying in your pants thou..carmem
Its a fact …any sexual act outside of marriage is abnormal behaviour. A number of health, social and economic problems could be solved if we accept that fact.
Cher: What you have said is true. All the problems in society have been caused – and are being caused – by people disobeying the Word of God. Nowhere is this more plainly seen than in the area of sexual behaviour. It amazes me how blind the people of the world (those who don’t know God) are. They have their great institutions of higher leaning and boast of their degrees. But they are no better than the people of the ancient heathen world. The great Apostle Paul (a true intellectual of the first century) wrote “…when they knew God, they glorified him not as God, neither were thankful; but became vain in their imagination, and their foolish heart was darkened.” (Romans 1:21) Unfortunately, today governments of big countries have bought into this ignorance. They are working in the dark passing laws to legalize sin and make perversion respectable in the name of equality while the AIDS epidemic rages out of control, suicides increase, they lose the war against drugs, their jails are overflowing, and the economy goes over the cliff! It is time for those who know the Word of God – not only pastors and evangelists – but Christians in every walk of life – to speak up and make a difference each in his or her own world: to be salt and light in these days. I invite you to visit my website http://www.livinghopeministries.ca Sincerely, Rev. Donald Hill. Pentecostal Evangelist.
Father in heaven please guide the boyfriend and brothers of mines i leave in Dominica ehh is woman like that that does make me paranoid and give people children unnecessary disease……. Awa wii girl u need help
You are playing dangerous games and are traveling on a dangerous path. What a life! Stop this type of lifestyle right now! You could also lose your life. Do you know who those men/ boys are that you are having a one-night/ weekend stand with them? In this age of promiscuity and for some anyone will do, there are some men/boys who are only interested in playing the field and a one-night stand. When you are not with them do you know who they are with? Since you are free with your body, they will accept you as you are. Know that they may also talk about you behind your back. They will not respect you. Have you ever thought of that?
Find other means of having fun. You could perform volunteer work at the weekends or legal work for legal pay as some students are doing. There are some students who also work a few nights during the week and on weekends. I would advise you to consider this especially at weekends. Tuition fee is expensive unless if you have parents who could afford to pay your way. The government is ever-ready to financially assist students. However do not take advantage of those avenues.
As Bella stated get a steady boyfriend.
You are also liable to contract a terminal disease as HIV, etc.
You are young and you should not take such chances with your life and health.
Today, you will feel youthful but this will pass away in time. I urge you to concentrate on your studies, meet friends, make some good friends whom you can share your weekends with and have some clean fun.
Were you brought up in the Christian faith? When last did you pray to God and go to church?
Our Lord Jesus Christ said: “Apart from Me you can do nothing.”
It appears to me that you are in dire need of God, His blessing, graces and enlightenment. This is why you are bored and seek this type of outlet which in the end may only make you more bored and will need to nowhere.
You also need to pray to God to assist you during your studies and also to help you to avoid bad company and men who will only use you and leave you. Listen and pay heed for your own good. May God assist you accordingly.
@Help
You say to Bella, “I am wondering if this the right thing”
You do not need an answer from Bella, you know quite well that this is not the right thing that you are doing.
I know that you know the answer because your conscience convicted you of your wrong doing. Otherwise you would have found it necessary to write to Bella about it.
Why don’t you listen to your conscience and leave Bella and the rest of us out of this?
From your conscience it is God who is trying to discipline your mind, because He loves you, and He wants to heal you, and to set you free, from the overwhelming and distructive lust of the flesh which holds your body in captivity.
Why turn away from God’s healing and freedom to live? And after He has healed you and set you free, He will walk you to that special person, whom He will have chosen for you to love and cherish.
Turn to God’s Love for you, and you will discover that there is nothing better to combat your stressful times, than a glorious dose of joy and peace.
I know what I am talking about through personal experience. So don’t think that I am just feeding a line.
And I pray that those words from me will influence you to try and reach out to God, by your faith, that Jesus Christ will know you have touched Him for healing.
And He will say to you: Your faith has made you free–but in your case it will the freedom from the control of fleshly lust in your body.
Why do you people read this things anyway. It is all made up
whossss u see puss when John call out Bel-liar fictional stories he thing getting post but when Me. Ms Pusina have something to say that Admin editing or not posting my comments. I already tell Admin i dow want people and is thats whats getting to him because he can’t have me. But Carmem..whossss
its easy …masterbate ,get sex toys and dolls…it will save u the fear of std..if u wanna be wrong at something go this way..
Emergency contraceptive will not protect you from STD’s which includes HIV, my friend.
WISE UP ! ! I really think you should get tested , or by the way , are you already HIV POSITIVE ? ? ? ?
i am getting worried now,these stories are so vague no truth made up.not saying things like these dont happen but lack energy and real life come on dno,give up this section get some thing positive
Well look for a website in Antigua. What happen? It don’t have any there that is why you coming on DNO? We love “dear bella”…..leave it alone.
its not positive to say such to the person Buwo!
There have been certain stories on Dear Bella and were made up.
you go to college?no wonder they say education c ecst pas lesprit. young ladt pull up your socks before it too late. how will you feel in the future when a handfull of guys point their finger at you about that past? turn to the bible too and pray that will surely help. All the best.
@ Kevin, Antigua
Why worry? It sounds like you need a real life. DNO does not need your advice. Keep it to yourself.
Then do not complain since you are an Antiguan and have nothing to contribute specifically to this article. I suppose that you are only curious to read what is going on in DA. Welcome! Nevertheless, just read it and pass it up.
Are you really in Antigua? What are you doing on our Dominica Website? Looking for excitement? No excitement on your Antiguan one?
I am very pissed, you don’t need help you are just seeking attention in a trampish way,so what are you studying in college Stdology? HIVology? at the rate you are going you will finish with a degree in Aidsology and a doctorate in deathology,I work as a health professional,I would admonish you to go visit the Aids unit in your area,your reckless behavior will surely come to a SCREECHING halt,you have got to be out of your mind,getting pregnant is nothing compared to what you are setting yourself up for smdh!
WOW;;;;;;;;;; WE ALL BETTER PRAY OUR MAN IS NOT PART OF THIS,CAUSE THIS IS SOME MESSED UP SH**
yeah yeah my girl keep going but emergency contraceptives dont prevent aids hiv or std so go along abd ride free
FAYA BUN.
THIS IS PURE RUBBISH!
SHE KNOWS IT IS WRONG…SHE JUST LOOKING FOR ATTENTION
imagine that for true a college student. MAY YOO FAIT LI MAL? eben e sort?
You are young and having fun but you know somethin is not right. Apart from the diseases, some things follow you for a long, long time. I spoke to an old school friend (a guy) we’ve known each other for many years, when I asked him if he ever saw a mutual friend (a girl) he laughed with a smirk and said some not nice remarks around her being the village bike. She wasn’t even that naughty at school and we’re talking many years later and my friend has not seen her. I assume you are going to college because you want a good future. Stop and think, guys will talk and eventually they will make the connection, do you really want the possibility of having the wrong reputation follow you into your future.
a fast motorbike too….. no brakes when i hold dat eh is weelie i weelieing.
i can guarantee that most of u who calling the young lady nasty worse than her! stop it and grow up she needs help before its too late. Darling it was not the kind of energy booster u needed try seeking christ and get some positive influence in ur life and u will see the diference! thanks for speaking out and asking for help since that means you were in doubt about your actions.
I AGREE WITH YOU HALF OF THE PPL THERE NASTY .. DOMINICANS HYPOCRITE .. THE SAME PPL YOU SEE SAYIN NYACK AND I WONT DO THAT SAME PPL IF U MEET IN A TRIPLE KAY JAM AND YOU FLASHIN MONEY .. SLEEPING WITH YOU ONE TIME EVEN WANT TO HAVE YOUR CHILD
yup my chic on crack need a head check girl wen ur boyo fall out then u gan ask urself a question? oh my lord stop that sh** get a man ONE MAN for every night if it means stopping that shit u doing what the hell is this “one night stand acts as fuel booster” full of shit no wonder women have to look bad, find something good to do with urself
Ms One night stand, If you feel weird after you sleep around then you know its not the right thing. The girl never said she wanted a long term relationship. Running around is not the best option. If your not ready for a relationship get your services from one person FWB.
ON LUNCH ; MISS FUEL BOOSTER;DONT LET THE DEVIL PUT THE GARMENT DEFILED YOU BY FLESH.KEEP YOUR SELF IN THE LOVE OF GOD, LOOKING FOR THE MERCY OF OUR LORD JESUS CHRIST UNTO ETERNAL LIFE.
IN THIS DAY AND AGE, WE STILL CONSIDERING HER ACTIONS AS NASTY, PEOPLE GROW UP. WHAT EVER SHE DOES IS HER PROROGATIVE .
@ Great
Prerogative.
not just nasty ……dam nasty
GREAT: You are saying what the young lady does is her own business. Many agree. But unfortunately what we do in the realm of sexual beaviour often affects other people. If she becomes infected with a STD or even HIV not only will she suffer herself but in all probability she will past it on to another partner. Some types of STD have long tern effects and we know of one case where a marriage broke up because it as discovered the husband had been infected in a previous relationship many years before. Also this young woman is not doing justice to the man she may someday marry. She will be presenting him with “used goods” after giving herself to so many oher men. Some will say this does not matter in this day an age. It certainly matters to God! And it matters to many of US in the world WE live in. I am also concerned about the reputation this young woman is earning for herself. Believe me, her college years do count! The reputation she gains for herself in college can follow her through life. No woman want to be remembered for this kind of behaviour. There are people who make comments to a letter like this to judge and condemn. Some comment to spue out their own brand of filth. Others write because they care. They know God loves us all and He will forgive and change all who come to Him through Christ who said, “I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father but by me.” (St. John 14:6) Sincerely, Rev. Donald Hill. Pentecostal Evangelist.
Pregnancy is the least of your worries. Aids, syphilis, gonorrhea and the other stds should be your worry.
Nothing wrong with a healthy sexual appetite but do it safely. Not judging you just trying to keep a beautiful dominican sister disease free.
Condoms 100% of the times…
Carib genius you can not keep her disease free she needs to keep her legs closed when she feels herself running on low fuel agood night’s rest on the sexfilled weekends should give her a burst of energy for the new week!
gyal u fi check me one ah dem weekends…. i totally 4 d one nite stand…. and dem hipocretes talkin bout bible is lesbian and batty man dem are!
thats totally not nice the girl needs good advice and help not encouragement to run man
u need help just like her
waw Am a guy and i think your nasty.
and the ordasity to even ask if u doing something wrong shows how much common sense u don’t have.
I know u having your fun but i do hope that you will also accept the consequences.
MY GIRL U DOH EASY EH! AH DE WORK LOAD KINDA GETTING TO U! WAH U THINK IS U ALONE DAT GOING SCHOOL THEN?!
MY GIRL DOH MAKE NO EXCUSE DERE! JUST ADMIT U LIKE TO KOKAY! AND IS DIFFERENT TOLEY U LIKE!
LOL
YOU WANT MORE WOOD FOR DE FORE
*FIRE*
offorse some of dem ppl dat writing to dear bella just like noticing!!!! i just wasted 15 minutes wen i cudve saved 15% or more on my car insurance!!!!!! REAL REAL TALK!!!!!!!!
That one kill me..im still laughing hehehehehehehee
Salop P, p, p
I DON”T BELIVE THIS STORY, I THINK SHE JUST WROTE THIS JUST FOR WRITING IT SAKE.
I had a few myself, it is a great source of energy booster, but protect yourself , what happen to you ah? you doesn’t see all the warnings out there? Pregnancy is no longer an issue child is the HIV that is the issue!!!!!
Ha ha ha. That was an interesting post. I cannot judge you by your statements or actions. All I can say is that there has to be other activities you can indulge in to boost your energy. Sports, hiking, art, and if all that fails get a partner, commit to him and pretend every weekend it is a one night stand. Have him meet you at secret locations and have wild sex, but don’t sell yourself short and sleep around. In the end you will regret.
Don’t ever under estimate the power of prayer!
All else fails drink a RED BULL
I bet is a “Christian” girl! Like so many others…smh.
Just to remind you being christian is to be “Christlike”you might want to say she probably grew up in a Christian home,I can accept that.
Ok.. when i first started reading this i actually thought it was a guy who wrote it, and i thought this guy not serious. Then i read further and saw it was a gurl, then i thought “WOW..OK”. It’s sad that in my mind i just brushed off the instance when i thought it was a guy and I judged the young lady. I hate this way of thinking.. society’s double standards becomes your own way of thinking.. sad. To the young lady, just have sex with one person you trust. Am not sure what’s worse.. drinking alcohol or having sex as a past time.. wierd..
Girl do your thing until your coocooloce finish. how many years of college do you have left?
Is it so hard to settle with one person? are you not confusing yourself even more…contraceptive can only prevent pregnancy, not STD..pregnancy is nine months sometimes less if premature..Aid is a life sentence…
Why would you go to college to attain an education week days, and be a fool on the week ends…..
l’éducation n’est pas l’esprit…
you need some common sense..
I pray God my brother don’t take you as his WIFE after all of this…
You too damn nasty…What kind of advice do you expect from the Councillor?? Neways there is a need for bitches like you out there…for man like me to “free up” my head too…DAMN!!
please use protection or better yet find someone have a relationship then u can sex your life away, but go about it the right way if you want to have sex find a partner and start clean the both of you. take tests .
girl dont worry with them people…..link me up and we can do a ting on the weekends. no attachments, no committments, plenty latexxxxx so long i looking for a girl like you!!!!!!
i think my prayers have been answered
thank you lord!!!!
you’re an idiot
U SOUND LIKE ONE OF THOSE CLINGY GIRLS, ALWAYS NEEDY….I CANT STAND A NEEDY NEEDLEMEISTER……URGGG THE THOUGHT JUST SCARES ME…..I have everything I want and need except a girl to bump and go!
girl dont worry with them people…..link me up and we can do a ting on the weekends. no attachments, no committments, plenty latexxxxx so long i looking for a girl like you!!!!!!
i think my prayers have been answered
thank you lord!!!!
walk in the spirit and you shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh. Forcus on Christ and your education..take energy foods etc. It’s all in your mind it’s not the sex that gives you the energy my dear. Maintain your integrity and you will be proud in the end..sex does not run it ruins lives especially if you do not have your license..you must control your feelings and don’t let your feeling’s control you. I can and so you can do it to once you set you mind to it. God bless you. Your body must be the temple of God. i need not say more.
i’m usually going to offer good advice but i have to admit that someone had too much time on dere hands and decided to see if that Bella ting is real… so she sent an email message lol
lol i dont think thats a good thing to help free up ur mind, there must be something else
da is ting to make man go behing every college ting it hsve in dominica
DO WAT U GOTTA DO BABY
CUZ WHO IN THE KITCHEN FEELING THE HEAT
ok you said that have access to emergency contraceptives i hope you have access to emergency antiretroviral(CURE FOR AID)
STUPESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I’ll be d/a for creole fest and would love to be one of ur one nightstand partners baby.Do ur thing girl at least u straight up unlike a lot of women out there who make some of us guys believe they love.
the article did not say the person is in DA.
LOL PERSON DIDNT READ .. LOL
What kinda stupid question is that nuh….*kiss teeth*
bitch u just nasty!!! concentrate on your school and leave toly alone!
STUPES! NASTY.
READ YOUR BIBLE AND PRAY.
lol lolzzz
The young lady is asking for help n thats wht u guys r saying omg…i’m embarrass……..i mean come on we all have our ways in releasing stress n she finds hers by havin sex wit random guys……….thts not gud but i wont call her a bitch even if its a lil slutty, but seriously sweetie u need to find some other way to release ur stress n boost u up cause tht road u goin down is very dangerous n all those pills could give u serious health complications in the future, u in school ui should no tht aids is not a toy………….so take ur school work seriously cuz those guys u screwing around with wont…………..