DEAR BELLA: I think I’m obsessed with changing my skin colour

Bella,

I find myself wanting to change my skin tone. I am black but somehow I always think light skinned people look better than us black girls.

I don’t want to be white but a lighter shade is what I am looking for. So I started using a bleaching cream and I am not sure if it became an obsession but the lighter I become the lighter I want to be.

Light skin women get the best looking men. They get by easier in life.  People in Dominica even have more respect for them. It’s like when you see a light skinned person you just know they are important.

I notice, however, there’s a different shade between my face and neck and that worries me.

Also, whenever I decide to give the cream a break, my dark shade comes back.

I want to continue to look lighter but I don’t want to use the cream forever. Can you give advice?

 

Bleaching


Hello Bleaching,

It seems to me that your problem is more mental than physical.

You have convinced yourself that light skinned people are more important than those of colour.

Even if that’s what the world would like us to believe, history has proven over and over again that this is not so at all.

Now, about the complications associated with your skin pigmentation, if you decide to continue or discontinue the bleaching cream, it is something I suggest you speak to a dermatologist about.

You may also want to talk to someone about your state of mind because that seems to be an issue.

People bleach everyday for whatever reasons. Take into consideration however, that there may be long term side effects that could negatively impact your health.

 

Best

Bella

 

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24 Comments

  1. UDOHREADYET
    June 1, 2019

    If its not this its that, if your toes were crooked you’d want straight toes and if your toes were straight you’d want crooked toes. If you’re hair was long you’d want short hair and vice versa… Self love is number one, if you’re trying to find reasons to dislike yourself then you’re already on the wrong path. Its normally other people with insecurities trying to impose their ignorant views on people who would otherwise normally appreciate their natural beauty.

  2. West coast peeping Tom.
    May 31, 2019

    Is bleaching the son of a west Coast lawyer residing in the US whose mom accepted and made peace with herself whilst the father has disowned him for being different from his sex @ birth?

  3. Chu Moon Fan(thats Chinese)
    May 30, 2019

    peter tosh says it all in his song…..Brand New Second hand

  4. Man bites dogs
    May 30, 2019

    Hello black girl so you want to be white, the easiest way to do it is to drink a glass full of bleach at bed time next day you will be white as snow. Oh don’t forget to sing I long to be white as snow.

  5. FLORA
    May 30, 2019

    The mare fact that this stupidness can be printed on a national media is a clear indication of how far back Dominica and sadly, the rest of the world has gone. The Black Power days are really history. This girl needs a dose of black consciousness together with all those who seem to sympathize with her.

  6. Maybe
    May 30, 2019

    Take bleach and pour on you if you don’t love the beautiful color you have or the way God created you

  7. Anonymous
    May 30, 2019

    Its a give and take situation. I am a light skinned man but am attracted to dark skin women. Just love yourself and look good. :-D :lol:

  8. TeteMorne I From...
    May 30, 2019

    Well, your skin color is NOT the issue here. LOW SELF ESTEEM is YOUR ISSUE. Appreciate what GOD has given to you and top coveting foolishness.

  9. BN
    May 30, 2019

    This is an excellent example of mental slavery. You free but u just can’t shake it. As a black woman, I love me. Period! I have zero interest in looking white – because that’s what this is all about. If you want to know just how gorgeous black women are, there are many publications that have us gorgeous woman, in every shade. Read and educate yourself. This is a first step to empowering yourself. You have a choice. Choose not to berate yourself, and expose yourself to skin cancer, apart from the obvious, not valuing you. And when you done, help others get rid of that sick desire to bleach. Cherish the person you are, because there is so much there to appreciate.

  10. Brently
    May 29, 2019

    Go girl that toes still black

  11. Stupes
    May 29, 2019

    People with a mentality like you are the reason for this. I’m what many of you racists call a “shabeh” or “white boy” and I love dark skin women.

  12. Dan Tannet
    May 29, 2019

    Am white. Faced prejudice by black Dominicans. And they would brag to me about a white ancestor in their family!

  13. Jenny
    May 29, 2019

    Try the pill its a bit more expensive, works well for me

  14. J4R
    May 29, 2019

    good looking has nothing to do with skin colour. There are many light skinned people who are ugly.. Many brown/dark skin people who are pretty.. and vice versa

  15. mine
    May 29, 2019

    I think you need to see a shrink

  16. One of the Scattered
    May 29, 2019

    Bella is pretty on point (no pun untended). Bleaching cannot boost your self esteem. Sadly, you drank the widely disseminated Kool Aid of deception which espouses that “softer hair and lighter skin” is more beautiful and desirable.

    Control what only you can control and love yourself. Exposing yourself to the adverse effects of a bleaching agent is definitely unwise and not an expression of self love.

    Ultimately, it is your life and decision to make. My two-cents worth of advise is that you work on improving your more redeemable and non-external personal qualities so that others will accept you for who you really are.

  17. Kermit
    May 29, 2019

    Go and bleach nah. For all your lips to stay stand and around your eyes looking like a raccoon and your face red, red, red like somebody throw Clorox on it.

  18. Praying for DA
    May 29, 2019

    If this hirl don’t embrace her skin and stop using these cancer creams :twisted: :twisted:

  19. time has told
    May 29, 2019

    Foolish. Light skinned people are black too. Understand that your melanin is a blessing. When the sun is being drawn closer to the earth and our ozone layer depletes it is your “blackness” and righ melanin that will save you from harmful uv rays. But, go ahead and bleach yourself to look like a monkey. Your lips will be black and your skin will look pale and you will look like a monkey, but to each his own. You will be susceptible to skin cancer and other skin diseases as a result, but go ahead, do it if you think you looking hot when you stand in front the mirror. While you are at it go ahead and buy some white or asian people’s hair to put on your head. Get some colored contacts and glue on some eye lashes and plastic nails. Fakeness is what is in these days. Then these women turn around and say they looking for a real man. The irony.

  20. S.M.M.F.H
    May 29, 2019

    I think she need help really help. Or you can just move to Alaska that might help. But if you ugly you ugly.

  21. May 29, 2019

    Dear friend, i understand your pain/dilemma. We often try to convince ourselves that color-prejudiced behavior has been eradicated, but the truth is i see it everyday. I am a person with lighter skin and i often see individuals bashing dark skinned people everyday, whether it is done covertly or overtly. We all do things to make ourselves feel better but bleaching your skin is just going to have a negative effect on you, mentally and physically. Also even if you bleach, the people around you are soon going to notice and that might be more of a problematic situation. I’m not going to be cliche and tell you to love your skin because that’s how God made you, because in actuality we all hate things about ourselves whether they are internal or external. What i will advise though, is that you start valuing yourself more and that you start understanding that, that’s the way you are. Once you have accepted yourself and have come to terms with your dark skin, you will feel more comfortable.

  22. darkie
    May 29, 2019

    Imagine we, black people, are the Majority in this land and our skin still cannot catch a break. we have colorism instead of racism.
    But my girl, bleach all you can, you still not going to cash in on lightskin privilege. People will see you bleaching and look down on you anyway, talking behind your back saying you hate yourself.
    I CANNOT see myself hiding from sun, worshiping cake soap. And men that only value light skin (when they self so black) are not worthy men.

  23. smhhhh
    May 29, 2019

    In Asa banton voice….” Your DA”….black is beautiful, when you get vitiligo you will stop

  24. May 29, 2019

    By way of hundreds of paintings and scores of sculptures in my series “Daughters of the Caribbean Sun” I have spent a lifetime trying to convince Afro-Caribbean women that black is beautiful. Please do not modify your facial features, hair and skin tone to satisfy a foreign concept of beauty, just be your natural self.

    “Then I will swear beauty herself is black,
    And all they foul that they complexion lack.”

    (From William Shakespeare’s Sonnets to a Dark Lady.)

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